fil thinks these are porno, i said it’s just the socks, they change everything like oh this girl is thirteen and her interests include skipping, pigtails, rainbows and tea parties please stop jerking off.
H&M socks don’t last very long when you walk all over toronto good thing i have 6 other pairs.
peep my pipes.
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Phil: well get going sweetness cuz i will be home soon and the only thing i will be doing is making and eating my lesbian macaroni
me: THAT SOUNDS LIKE SO MUCH FUN FOR ME TO BE HOME IN TIME FOR
Phil: oh i meant… nvrmnd no if you’re gone when i get home then i guess that makes sense so you dont have to watch me
raymi: ha cos lesbironi is such an event
merkley???: work with the mistakes not against them
me: i am trying
merkley???: embrace them make it into barf
me: no this piece is whimsical cant
merkley???: ha ha — you said “piece” art fag
me: i thought you would like that im sending you a picture tell me what to do sending to @merkley sent tell me now
merkley???: must be a big file, didnt get it yet
me: omfg i hate yer email account everytime i fucking email
merkley???: its YOU
me: im sending to gmail and i hate you ITS YOU
merkley???: it prob didnt even leave your computer yet
me: oh you dick it is you always only you everyone else gets my email its you i emailed it a thousand years ago you didnt get it
merkley???: look in your out box
me: i did
merkley???: still uploading i bet
me: it’s sent ITS GONE COS I AM DOING OTHER THINGS NOW THATS HOW GMAIL WORKS
there’s a fucking st.louis in the annex i wanted to try it out before it went out of business, i know it’s a chain, i’ve never ever been, you winners who have.
six flatscreens wtf?
that was my server, she was the bartender too but did all the work, there were way too many people on staff for such a tiny place, even a hostess, like i can’t see where i want to sit from across the street. it all came off as very insecure. anyway taking pictures of the decor and everything never fails, it fucks with their minds and they think you might be a spy sent from management to dine on chicken wings, ha. who the hell takes pictures inside st.louis?
retards who intend to blog about it.
didn’t know fries came with it, they’re pretty good but a raymi diet no-no. i scarfed 1/3 of them anyway. i figure that’s how these fuckers get you fat, pile fries on top of the wings so you have to eat your way to them, then you are like i will just dig them out, then even digging gets tiresome this post is a new low for me kids.
the air-tight seal/pressure blasted this shit all over my face and hair when i opened it no worries, three staff members saw it all go down, oh yeah i was by myself too, extra embarrassing, fil was on his way.
not really a fan of blue cheese this was nice, cheaper, but nice.
see? two wings later and i am fries mountain. tuesday is wing nite, 9 for 6.95, 18 for 12.95, with fries.
don’t think i’ll be going back no offense, not based on quality, it’s just not my scene, yes, i have a “scene” and consider myself to be somewhat of an elitist.
hey if you have a restaurant that you want me to come eat and take pictures of and NOT talk shit about on my blog, email me raymitheminx@gmail.com – great for advertising and cool points.
we should have went here as hokey as it is, the place was packed. i dunno if it will last either.
every business that takes this corner spot, fails.
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party couch, i bet hobos sleep on it when the tenants go inside for the nite.
pauper’s, nice patio, if you like drinking amongst nerdy annex spinsters and guys with eyebrow piercings.
fil got egg on me. now we have to reboil more, i knew we couldn’t wait for the pickling process to finish.
seeing the self-portraits is what gets fil to take out his dslr and school me.
after explaining to my mom fifty times that that “interview” is not a contest and there is no reason to nominate and where the thumbs up thing is etc unghhhhhh (typos left as is for full effect of how on edge i am/get.
Phil: i will think about it you think too
tracey: are you supposed to nominate yourself?
lauren: there is nothni to nominate its a fucknig interview dont talk to me anymore today im going to explode dont write back hahaa well all i know is i am having some woine i am way too wound up
Phil: do what you have to do peach
me: PEACH WAHT DOES HTAT MEAN
Phil: ?
me: im kidding
Phil: oh phew
me: im being psycho
Phil: ok psycho go tan
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and then i can’t find my tanning goggles
me: found them someone put them in my new drawer
Phil: where
me: ! you! dont ever dothat again
Phil: i told you to look there and you said u already did i told you to look there and you said u already did i told you to look there and you said u already did i told you to look there and you said u already did don’t force me to clean up your messsy area then
me: it is our messy area thats lauren space for lauren time for looking in the mirror at lauren
!!PAINTING SOLD!! AND FOR THE EXACT ASKING PRICE TOO!! I’M RICH AGAIN!
looks dark and spooky but it is actually sunny and whimsical.
see? as fil fucks off down the street with the environmentally friendly reusable grocery bag oh that must mean we are going to whole foods! i asked fil if he was going to be as annoying as last time where he thinks he is planet lesbo earth saviour and gets all manic and MUST find the most organic of organic tuna – he’s switched to all natural patchouli/orange deodorant guys, he’s serious.
fil’s dinner, saving the world one bite at a time with the washable non-garbage bowl.
mine, note the cardboard. i wasn’t planning to eat it all in one sitting, fil helped, then gave me a WICKED COOL LECTURE about recycling!
i normally throw in a hard-boiled egg as my meat substitute but they were out.
how much of a cock was i for saying meat substitute?
my FIRST TIME hardboiling eggs. i had to call my mom and she had to ask her mom. i have seen it done before but i was super young and that’s when my mom gave a shit about making food so i guess she has forgotten. i put the phone on speaker for fil to hear my mom, nana, and papa all talking at once trying to tell me how to do it and he asked me to TURN OFF THE NOISE! i thought it was cute.
check out the crazy in his eyes.
i think cid is bipolar.
received an anonymous letter in the mail yesterday via easypost i would be lying if i said i wasn’t nervous intrigued by it. tell me if it was you cos i don’t remember sending myself a letter.
though it seems like something i would go out of my way to say/send to myself so who knows.
we ate two, pickled the other four. i am a good cook.
that white blemish on the left is not on the canvas i don’t know why it’s there anyway whoever wants it email me and i will tell you the astronomical price of it based on who you are and level of how much i like you oh and you can tell me to stop adding shit to it or keep going etc.
cool story tough guy.
wet hair + bun = curly barf
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these geniuses decided the day they put up my interview is a good one to change the voting system, so now it’s thumbs up or thumbs down, go give me a thumbs up please.
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baltimore weighs in
dear raymi
when i was originally directed to this site (and i dont remember how) i said (probably something like this, embarrassingly enough) “nice, a hot girl” but two minutes later i said “shit, this girl is funny “ and, as a sidebar, i thought …and she’s hot too… (please read the … [ellipses?] as the beginning and end of a internal conversation) but the crux of this email is you are funny and, to use a word i dont really like but find particularly apt in this situation, clever and i read the words instead of just looking at pictures please continue to be funny but dont think about trying to be funny because you will forget how so after you read the last word of this email, and it has become very confusing indeed, forget all about it starting now
crap sleep last nite. figured since we weren’t drinking booze we may as well have cold coffees after 9pm and go for a walkies and rent road to guantanamo, it ended around 12.30 then couldn’t get to sleep, that fucking umbrella song that every slut i know is all about was running through my head, i have only heard it a few times, maybe i’ll get it off itunes today to blow my mind to it all afternoon. and now i am up cos that pepto bismol jingle decided to affix itself to THE VERY ESSENCE OF MY MIIIIND.
on a sidenote, if i were to somehow meet rihana and she had her umbrella, could i like, demand to stand under it with her, is her song like a mutually binding-contract if i buy it off itunes? or am i going to get a check to the ground and an elbow to the spine and served with a restraining order?
maybe she should be a little more careful with all those promises she throws around, what’s that other one about being a murderer, no wait, the SOS please someone help me, see, lucky i am smart, cos not everyone is so like some dude could you know esgithrgnrelnvfdlbfd
i have a good feeling about the garbage what will be my posts today, fingers crossed.
the old man next door is yelling at the ancient woman he lives with, his wife or mother, who knows, he is depressing the hell out of me, calling her an asshole and other mean shit, she is the frailest little bird thing and he is an angry fucking dick, i was standing in the hall listening, this close to yelling STOP YELLING AT YOUR WIFE but figured he would say she is not my wife and then we get to have hostile uncomfortable tension on our floor until we move away or they both die. if she dies and i never say anything i will feel like shit for the rest of my life, so what if i make that guy feel embarrassed, he SHOULD feel that way. he just left the apartment and waited for the elevator and i watched him through the peep-hole, he was breathing really heavy and sighing. fuck him. yeah it’s so overwhelming to verbally abuse a woman likely suffering from alzheimers and cannot fend for herself, way to go dickbag.
