last nite i dreamed that there was all this looting going on and half-blown up people running around with blood and they were destroying this mcdonald’s and we got our food and then went to this house next door and walked through the backyard over dead rotting cows and went inside and fil offered the owners of the house two bananas so we could chill there and eat our mcdonald’s and then we were driving up a big bridge that was higher than the CN tower and there were tiny apartments as the base of the bridge all brick wall and i asked if they were low-income housing and then we were in a some hasidic jewish neighbourhood and a bunch of fat women were laughing and falling down this snowbank and then we came to a tiny ciniplex theatre and we went inside and fil went to the bathroom and i started fixing my hair in the mirror and this black chick starts screaming at me for using her mirror and i copped a major attitude and was all fuck you i can use any mirror i want you don’t own this mirror and she said why don’t you get another beyonce book (of destiny’s child) and then she said my dad was a bitch and his name was steve and i wanted to scrap her but fil dragged me out of there before i could.

i dreamed of this it’s true.

and there were mental patients that escaped from this house beside the mcdonald’s and they were rioting and celebrating all their mcdonald’s food and for some reason the mcdonald’s employees kept on working and making hamburgers.

Jamie says:

and have some kids gig it up years later and read from it to each other around a cmapfire

raymi says:

gig

raymi says:

cmapfire

Jamie says:

i kow

raymi says:

u are dyslexic

raymi says:

HAHAHHAHAA

Jamie says:

i can;t type

raymi says:

i kow

Jamie says:

i use all the wrong fingers

raymi says:

i thought u said that to be funny

Jamie says:

no

Jamie says:

i’m pathetic

Jamie says:

i can’t believe i wrote a whole book

raymi says:

what the hell are you going to do with yourself now

Jamie says:

even though it’s still full of typos

Jamie says:

retire

raymi says:

do u think people would buy a seven page book?

Jamie says:

ha

Jamie says:

i will

raymi says:

and then the 8th page will be point form notes of possible story endings

Jamie says:

fill the back of it with empty pages and “invite the reader to create their own ending”

nowl says:

tonight going to see Anagram play

nowl says:

with all the girls..

nowl says:

maybe a boy or two thrown in

raymi says:

wow yer such a stud

raymi says:

who are anagram

nowl says:

no studs complete without a lauren

raymi says:

right

nowl says:

anagram is xenias exbfs band

raymi says:

right

raymi says:

are they shitty

raymi says:

but like ironic shitty which means cool

nowl says:

theyre shitty and not bad

nowl says:

theyre sloppy and not bad. Matt the Singer might be a cut above and is very good with falling around and sometimes breaking things

nowl says:

they usually play parties

nowl says:

the last house party i went and saw, that they played at

nowl says:

someone started a fire upstairs and the placed burned down

raymi says:

haha

nowl says:

julia was there

nowl says:

her sister was living there

nowl says:

they lost all kinds of stuff and were all sued by the owner

raymi says:

did they pay?

nowl says:

dunno

nowl says:

you can ask xenia about it when you see her

raymi says:

thats a retardedly trashy story and endearing

i always wanted a man’s sweater that was striped red and green and had a zipper on it and a collar and now i have one because some unlucky hack left it all hung by itself on the wall and forgot about it so i stuffed it in my left sleeve and then i looked like i had a robotic arm that was fatter than my right arm and i was a good peter sellers sleuth type and before i left i turned around and pointed at the room and said YOU’VE BEEN MINXED!

ok no i didn’t.

i feel guilty about the sweater now like there is going to be an article about it in the gossip town times and then i’ll have to bury it in the backyard and then i will be on city pulse with a sweatshirt on my head and my lawyer will be shoving the camera away.

i’m so hung/dehydrated i feel 90 years old.

el duderino you.may.have.already.won@gmail.com to raymi

he’s getting married soon –
18 hours soon.

i got him drunk and high last night.
i got him drunk and high tonight.

i distract him with gameboy and mario.
he’s totallly into it.
he screams with excitement,
he curses with anger.

my job is done.

…the best man

i get strange emails.