ps. who the fuck spilled an entire beer all over my coat, it was all down inside my sleeve and collar and i had to walk home carrying three booze bottles in the cold wearing a wet jacket and now i am going to drink everyone’s left over sauce because someone in my circle of friends is a secret dick and i don’t mean private eye.

pps. wendi don’t invite strange guys from the hallway into our hotel party when i am lying on the bed stuffing four slices of the most untasty pizza ever into my mouth – one guy was way creepy and i’m glad i gave my fucking business card to his buddy too, and even as i was doing it i was thinking in my head i should not be doing this, it’s all wendi’s fault she got them to circle me and then said THIS GIRL IS THEE BEST BLOGGER IN THE WORLD (maybe she said universe) pointed at me a bunch so then i crossed my arms over my chest, nodded and said IT’S TRUE! ahhahahaha.

i should make a separate blog just for writing down everytime this scenario happens when wendi is introducing me to someone, how much she fluffs me up to them and then fucking leaves so i am forced to talk about myself to a total stranger like i am a used car salesman as well as the used car and i can see on their face how their brain is 100% rejecting all the bullshit coming out of my mouth. thanks wendi. usually now i just say oh yeah i have a blog bye or talk about myself in a self-depricating fashion that comes across real facetious-like cos i am a socially awkward buffoon. then a month later i meet them again and they are like hey i thought you were a total flake or something equally rude and then cap it off with but i was wrong you’re awesome turns out you’re famous blah bla h blah. i would like to return the what i initially thought of them favour too, but i am not a piece of shit like that. hi guys!

ppps. i was so mad about my jacket i decided to do a theatrical performance of rage for fil by throwing it onto the floor and gruffing?/growling like a grizzly bear and stalking in a circle three times before i put it on.

Raymi Art Show Tour

Lindsay

there are some pictures from last nite on my flickr (once you scroll through the waterworld ones) i am tired of doing all the work for you go there and look at them.

i just spent like 4 hours lying in bed watching the postman, and now i feel better about my life. watching a movie stretched out to be four hours long for commercial break purposes on new years day makes you feel like yeah i could be a mail carrier in a post-apocalyptic world, totally, i could even be that chick kevin costner knocks up, and as i lay there with crap on my teeth, coffeebreath and pasta peameal bacon breakfast/lunch fil creation medley in my belly i thought, fuck i have it lucky, why am i complaining when these people don’t even have microwaves and i even cried when the girl told kevin costner that he handed out hope like pieces of candy (that’s a good thing) (oh and i also cried when i flipped to the spice girls documentary thing and fil said why did you sigh and i said because and started crying cos i want to see the spice girls, turns out i can’t that ship has sailed).

where was i?

oh yeah i want to buy waterworld and if everything wasn’t closed today i would walk over to hmv with my 30 dollar gift certificate, buy it and then watch it tonite, i don’t care how many people enjoy railing against that film i think it is the most magnificent fucking piece of cinematographic (yes that’s a word i looked it up) (no i didn’t) masterpiece ever. period.

then i thought why do i like these movies so much this time of year, oh right that’s because i live in a part of the world where it is like antarctica several months out of the year and it is the only chance i get to experience crystal blue water and guys with gills on their feet.

anyway.

i like the postman only because it was on tv and tom petty is in it and i will think of more reasons later.

oh right, the postman is exactly like waterworld, except on land.

i am a genius.

‘in the mountains, there you feel free’

stay gold ponyboy,
riley

blogging has been hard lately, i don’t think i have ever said that before other than after my nervous breakdown, and even then i didn’t say that, or maybe i did, all i could bring myself to blog was three sentences every two weeks or so. the last month (as christie stated on our hangover shopping spree) has been a drunken blur, if not for digital cameras and other person’s present i doubt i could remember any of it. next year i am taking a december hiatus and fucking off and fil gets zero presents. i’m pretty sure all the boozing and xmas partying on top of xmas partying is directly associated to my kidney pain. i can’t wait for the ultrasound techie to be like doo dee doo doo OHMYFUCKINGGOD THERE’S A FUCKING DINOSAUR WHERE YOUR KIDNEY USED TO BE!!

here is an example of how i blogged post-nervous breakdown. sad.

i feel like people are tired of me and my stupid stories so i made a point to just stop writing them down or remembering them altogether, i think it’s just a phase.

i’m just hyper-focused on my health right now and blogging every single thing some french stranger yelled at me on christmas eve seems inconsequential.

one good thing about funks is you come up with some good one-liner emo quotes, here’s one i’ve said over and over in my head since all this nausea pain began I’M NOT GOING TO LIVE VERY LONG AND YES I AM AFRAID TO DIE. now pretend you read that in rolling stone and it’s printed over a picture of me in a field holding flowers and a milk jug or something. see? gold i tell you.

happy new year.

this is pure garbage.

oh great MORE of them.

pitt needs this.

faeries are in right now.

mom i’m boooooored when are we going to mcdonald’s? here susan play with these until your dad gets home.

1 dollar necklace.

1 dollar nicole richie vacuum the house head thing.

presents from radmad i HATE roe.

fil’s present, i can’t help but feel that this is a dig at me.

cid hates art.

i bought new things!

two necklaces
four underwears
overall shorts
a shirt
a grey cardigan (now i have 4?)
three head wraps (bands?)

MEMEmemememememe!

leaving the hotel video.

and if you want to hang out tomorrow like a regular tuesday nite (for me/us, that’s a friday for you guys) email me mmmkay. not sure if it’s duane’s or tony’s hotel yet.

oh and i have zero resolutions so don’t ask, relying on the passage of time or a date to make changes in one’s life is stupid, how about just owning up to your shortcomings now, fat ass? oh once valentine’s day rolls around my life will be so much better. pfft. the only alteration to my lifestyle i foresee happening will be because of the results of a bloodtest i take for the pain i have recently been experiencing, not because a bunch of families from oshawa, mississauga and ajax will descend upon nathan phillips square to watch a fucking ball drop.

i wish i looked like a cabbage patch doll all the time too.

how to change the world.

look it’s that stupid kid (grey cardigan,right) who drags his mom out to bars and parties and other ridiculous shit in toronto and he’s only 12 or something. sad.

his poor mother, i wanted to go up to her son and say YOU’RE KILLING YOUR MOTHER but christie decided it was time for barfing.

christie‘s under there somewhere.

“missing” cds.

present fil picked out for duane, i wanted to get something cuter but according to fil GUYS LIKE STUFF THAT DO STUFF.

if you can believe it, duane’s drunk outshined pitt’s, we were stunned.

tony sucks as usual.

party pants showed up.

i have a video of duane doing sweet child o mine and it is BRUTAL he will probably kill himself if he sees it. i haven’t been able to watch it yet. i deleted the video of me doing jewel. last nite was so stressful for me i unleashed 5 separate crappings. did anyone at least get me doing oh darling?

this is a picture i looked at earlier and decided I AM BUYING A NEW DRESS but then fil made us steak and potatos and now i am wearing a t-shirt the size of the superbowl, and there is no new dress in sight. i am also on my period.

skipped out on the clinic, i’m feeling better and i do still have an ultrasound appt. soon so i’m hoping kidneys like, fix themselves?

i’m a horrible coward when it comes to these things.

we ate nachos twice yesterday and then chinese food for dessert. i can’t eat chinese food anymore (or as chinese people might say i can’t eat food anymore), the msg or whatever that magical stuff is just doesn’t sit well with me.

i am an old delicate flower.

christie barfed four times last nite.

new term: tampwn’d as in tampon + pwn’d (as in owned).

everybody wins.

example: richard was putting the moves on michelle all night long but she wasn’t really feeling it and too polite a girl to tell him to stop, once he manouvered her trousers off he soon realised he was tampwn’d. burn on richard.