we watched funny games last nite, it’s good and scary and will make you very stressed, it’s kind of clockwork orangey in a sense. anyway, tim roth stars in it, i say oh yeah that’s the dude in dawn of the dead, fil says no, i say yes, then a bet is placed for 20 bones. basically, the guy in dawn of the dead (jake weber) has no business LOOKING EXACTLY LIKE TIM ROTH and vice versa, GEEZ!
try and tell who is who in the following pictures:
what the fuck right?!
the first one is tim, then jake, tim, jake, tim, jake.
this post got me out of doling over twenty bucks, WORLD I WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT PHIL IS RIGHT AND I AM WRONG.
+++
oh hey and now lets talk about HOW SKINNY I AM AGAIN RIGHT NOW it’s been like 24 hours at least. i tried on this dress last week and went against my disease of having to walk out with at least something every time i walk into an h&m, thought about it some, then forgot about it until i saw this picture on sass‘s blog, and then immediately wanted it again:
anyway, it’s sass’s fault for blogging this picture, it was only 16 bucks anyway, she picked it up for me yesterday and oh right the skinny moral of this bit is i am wearing that dress over an entire outfit and it’s a size 6.
friday we had dinner with gill, this is a rock ‘n roll, not bad.
thursday’s jerk chicken mmmmmmmmmm.
what i was wearing that i guess made that PLAN dude chase me down the street, ugh. i feel a bit too bouncy in this shirt, plus you can totally see my nips, not that i care, just in the annex, there are only so many disapproving glares from raisin-faced wasps i can take before i have a total george costanza meltdown.
sigh, i have post cottage blues, on top of pre-menses blues, good grief. i at least was able to crap infinity times yesterday, on top of the worst hangover quite possibly yet. i generously gave fil my last eno saturday when he had the spins, mistake. on the way home we had poutine and then a few hours later ordered chinese food. for real. i got a nice tan re-reading judy blume’s perverted summer sisters tale on the beach, it helped distract me from my hangover. now i get to figure out what to do with all my wrinkled clothes, i fuckin’ love overpacking. GOSH JEEZ.
i understand your hatred towards the douchey clerks. i try my hardest not to be one of those chicks i know what they wear looks better on them than me sux but its true and im not bitter i work at a c-store and there are tons of fit attractive chicks that come into the store wearing things i wish i could even think about buying and regardless of what their wearing its my job to be nice. everyone has SOMETHING to say about everything. i think the things you wear are so creative, look good and seem to fit the mood your’e in for the day, or moment. anyway… theres no point to this email really, i had a few too many jackncokes after work and and just putting off bed cuz that means i hafta wake up and go to work in the am….
im sure sometimes it doesnt feel like you’re appreciated, and surely very few people actaully know the real lauren, but when it comes down to it, you know you’re awesome you cant please everyone, right?! keep doing what you do
-dannielle
we went back to the same liquor store yesterday and i saw one of the chicks working, she has looooooong black curly (crunchy over processed) slick hair (woodbridge hair) and wears a huge fleece shirt over her uniform, to cover up her dumpy body. i purposely did not go to her check-out. while in the store i was thinking man, is it like part of your job to criticize every woman who comes in there when they leave? then i thought would i do the same, and honestly, as much of a judgmental dick i am, i wouldn’t, i pass up on a lot opportunities to rip into people’s outfits, meaning, i ignore other people, and if a hot babe (competition) comes in on my radar i do a mental note to take (copy) something from her outfit and thumbs up her in my head for a job well done. the only people i do slag in my head are the ones with bitchy attitude, no matter what they look like, but if it just so happens you’re a cunt to me on top of being ugly, you give me no choice but to chalk it up to self-hatred and bitterness on account of looking like a troll, not my problem.
two years ago there is no way i could wear tight leggings or short shorts, and now that i can, the transformation you notice in how people treated you when they knew you before you were a cow, during when you were a cow and now after when you’re ok (cos we are never ever satisfied are we) with your body, their attitude toward you changes slightly, resentment and bitterness, while all along during your starvation quest you were like i am dieting blah blah bla and they’re like IT WON’T WORK because they do not want you to get thinner, but you stick to your guns and do it anyway, and fuck them.
though cos of my big mouth (confidence, FUNNIER THAN EVERYONE ELSE) i’ve always noticed some chips on shoulders, anyway, now it’s monumental, to the point where you wonder hey i haven’t seen so-and-so in a long time, wonder why that is?
the moral of this post is i am always a victim. always.
and no i do not wear this outfit everyday, i took a ton of pictures and didn’t use them all at once
cures moodiness, i am slipping some in fil’s drink tonite
just in time too, i’m pre-menses right now, tho aren’t i always?
perfect, these will totally fit up my nostrils.
perfect for road vodka thanks guys.
then i left the room for an hour and someone got all up in my menses care package…
i took that tote out shopping yesterday, very spacious, anyway, if you have a teeny va-gine, i have like ten million tampons for you.
then off to ryerson for a project.
i had to take pictures of myself while being photographed a thousand times, then record some PSA material.
i am NOT awkward!
sass met me after work to babysit and destroy a shelf.
then we went for a brew at the imperial and saw this dinnerinthesky business over dundas square. last minute amex card holders were invited to dine, LUCKY!
i believe jen was one of the lucky dicks to experience this.
then tv on the radio as you already know about.
have yet to sew up that slit.
these pants, i tell you, people can’t handle the red, like they half-admire them half-attempt to scowl me into oblivion. lighten up squares! another thing, my short shorts, my buddy paul overheard two cashiers at the lcbo slaggin’ on my shorts after i left, he was in line and heard them say “…if I wore shorts like that…” what? what would happen? nothing, cos you CAN’T wear shorts like that. get OVER it and focus on yourself. i’m getting pretty tired of being treated so shitty from bitter chicks all over town just cos they’re insecure and forgot to take care of their own shit.
Oh by the way, I don’t want to start shit but after you left the LCBO, your clerk and my clerk started talking about your shorts. I totally gave them cut eye. They were both overweight too, so when the one girl said “if I wore shorts like that…” my only thought was “but you couldn’t wear shorts like that”. The two skinny female clerks there are faster and friendlier, I should’ve just waited in one of their line-ups.
-Paul
omg what else did they say!!!!!
That was it, I wasn’t paying attention then I clued in when I realized they had just finished talking about you.
you should have said THATS MY FRIEND YOU ARE TALKING ABOUT
I should have but I was too shocked. You’re right, those clerks like to start stuff, you didn’t even say anything to them to get them started.
happens to me ALL the time everywhere i go ugly people treat me shitty then play the victim
ungh, also i was with my TALL HANDSOME BOYFRIEND did they take note of that? you can’t walk around with a HOT BABE DUDE if you don’t make an effort to at least match him in the looks dept.
this print busts me up. sigh.
we are going away tomorrow now i don’t have to kill myself! and why do we always go away when i am a fat pre-menstrual pig, i also haven’t crapped in like DAYS.
oh YEAH happy fourth of july all you amerinoids!
all you dudes said happy canada day to us and were like BUT I DON’T KNOW WHAT THE MEANS!!! yeah me either i guess, in any event, we got our party over with first so i think that means we win. thanks for stickin’ with my blog even though you don’t understand how i talk eh. i will make more of an effort to post american material for you to enjoy.
