Ryan: you should start a rent a friend business

me: how do i do that

Ryan: i bet a lot of urban jerks would love to have a posse for a night
um start a webpage ,torontorentafriendservice.ca

me: u mean just hang out for work

Ryan: i think so
well there are randomer ways of making money

me: it wouldnt work i cant even get my real friends to hang out with me how would i get strangers to pay me to hang out with them?

Ryan: sucker them
see i think you’re cool, from reading your blog that’s the impression
i suppose you’re as uncool as anyone but that’s beside the point

me: i am neurotic and annoying
annoying people are well annoying
so i get it

Ryan: ok well there should be a network

me: it is lonely at the top

Ryan: if someone wants a neurotic annoying person then they choose you
for like a night when their real friends ditch them or they want to make an ex jealous

me: well i am more things than just annoying
like sweet but i get obnoxious if you are boring me

Ryan: yeah you could sit there and look pretty

me: and then people think i am wasted
but im not

Ryan: oh is THAT it
you’re good-lookin’.
i’d say…a handsome female.

me: oh yeah and im very good looking thats a big factor peple dont want to hang with me cos i am so good looking they feel like trolls

Ryan: other people are good-looking too
is it all in yr head that people don’t want to hang with you?
i mean you’re enthusiastic about drinking so what else is there.

me: dude i dont know im totally fucking joking right now
people cant handle my truth?
i am too transient i guess
i dont know people just do their own thing

Ryan: how do you start to accumulate hits, i’m starting a new blog with a friend.

me: uh i dont want to talk about that shit
if you dont know how then you are stupid and it will never happen

Ryan: i like yr idea of suckering people into reading anything you could spin off

me: BE INTERESTING
BE RELEVANT
BE COOL
BE FUNNY
BE GOOD LOOKING
THE END

Ryan: i know how but is there a shortcut

me: porn is the shortcut

Ryan: hahah ok check.
wouldn’t that be rude though
to show a dick
i would feel slighted to accidentally see a dick wouldn’t you

me: not you porn naked bitches porn