ok so we were playing the compliment game where we take turns complimenting ourselves using the alphabet and then that turned into the ‘dis game once we both got a chance to compliment ourselves using every letter of the alphabet. when i had ‘g’ for the ‘dis game i said I HAVE GHONNOREA then i said what if i really had ghonnorea and this is the way i chose to tell you and then fil said I AM GAY for his ‘g’ dis and i said ARE YOU REEEEALLY!? by the way fil isn’t homophobic he meant gay like really uncool.

then that woman fell off her chair and busted her hand.

later on i spent a good twenty minutes crying and trying to fight with fil, i am nice like that.

yesterday at the supermarket i asked the woman cashier if that old man from last week got his satchel back cos someone took off with his cart and his satchel? was in it and she was like WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT? and i said please i don’t have any friends be nice to me.

i dreamt i got turned down by liam gallagher for sex in a bar and i thought it was because of my winter hat but no it was because of my hair and i was like I WILL NOT FORGET THIS LIAM!