get ready for someone pissed me off story time!
so on our way into the ‘burbs we stopped off at red room so i could run in and give emily her popsicle painting then before i went back to the car i went to that variety store to get an energy drink (no carbs equals tired doods!) and as i scan the fridges and turn to go to pay i see two hipsters, one of which at first i honestly thought was an old lady cos she was small and crouched over and wearing a kerchief like your nona wears when she beats the rugs, anyway, the other hipster is this tallish guy (blond hair big calico framed spectacles) wearing leather metrosexual pointy cowboy boots, he looks a bit haggard and i think he’s gay, anyway, he is totally ignoring the girl hipster who is rambling on and on and on in this irritating nasally monotone speak like a full on monologue and i’m digging in my purse and i tune in to what she is saying and she’s talking about hair treatments and long hair and that’s what she would do if she had long hair and because 1. her friend is NOT paying attention to her at all 2. she is facing me and talking about long hair i think she is talking to me, so as not to be rude i say in a jokey airhead voice “are you talking to me?” and then there is a mile long pause and she “comes to” in this fucking valley girl voice uh NO i was talking to him and me and gay dude exchange a smile (he’s like even i couldn’t tell if she was talking to me expression on his face) and the cashier of the store starts chuckling because he’s been listening to her fucking prattle on and on about whatever the hell for way too long and my puncturing her essay to the world was like a fucking relief, so, she and her friend walk away and JUST before they exit the store she exclaims GET OVER YOURSELF! in her valley girl voice too and cos i’m mid-exchange with the cashier and him still chuckling over my are you talking to me line (really it wasn’t even funny to begin with) i couldn’t run after her and scratch her fucking eyes out, i did mutter you muuutherfucker like joe pesci in goodfellas though. when i got out of the store i was right on their heels and stood on the sidewalk gaping at the back of her fucking head and contemplated running after her and calling her a cunt to her face or ripping out her hair HOW DARE SHE! i was being NICE and i’m not the one talking about hair treatments and boring my friend to fucking death on a saturday afternoon in a variety store she is the one who needs to get over herself! i wanted to spit on the back of her head and if i was wearing appropriate running shoes I WOULD HAVE!
if you know this girl (platinum blond hair, haggard face, late 20s) total fag hag who was at the variety store on the south west corner of spadina and college (beside the poolhall) saturday afternoon just before 5pm TELL HER I WANT A FUCKING SHOWDOWN asap!
should i have body-checked her? what would you have done?
maybe if i looked like a tiny little troll like her, she would have been nice to me? and for future reference if you DON’T want a girl with long hair to think you are talking to her DON’T TALK ABOUT LONG HAIR AND TREATMENTS AND BE LOOKING AT HER WHEN YOU ARE TALKING AND DON’T HAVE A FRIEND WHO IS TOTALLY TUNING YOU OUT AT THE SAME TIME!
