regan called me 4 in the morning i was at noels and she was an e-tard and had already propositioned ndidi and i was her choice two and even said oh so i’m second place maybe if you called me first and i said come over here then and be with us and she said no i just want to be with a woman alone and then she called back ten minutes later begging for me and i said no i kinda like this guy so i didn’t go to her but then noel sends me a you are going to hate this email message dumping me a few weeks later anyway. regan, i blew it.



boondock saints – hot film. woah. not only kuz the irish dudes are hot city, just kuz of the violence and guns and toilet landing on the russian guy from the top of a building. i want to get a hail mary tattooed on my neck now.




here i am with scooby. i know i look like total ass. this is when no one would swim with me because i was constantly urinating in the pool. blerp.



blonty is balmy


i got stung on the ass by a bee this one time i was peeing on the grass behind my backyard with brooke kuz no one was home so we just went there. we were making forts in the garage out of cardboard boxes and dirty blankets. sarah was there too. i ran all the way to kim’s to tell my mum about the bee sting and i pulled down my pants and showed everybody my ass and i was crying.


i rule.





I’ve a Big One says:

bony maronie


raymi the minx says:

yo hussla


raymi the minx says:

whats the word


I’ve a Big One says:

there is no word


I’ve a Big One says:

i’m stuck at my family’s in kitchener


I’ve a Big One says:

i punched the shit out of my own face last week and got arrested for it


raymi the minx says:

oops i was wearing my shirt half inside out and all twisted up all morning til now


raymi the minx says:

idiot


I’ve a Big One says:

then i missed court yesterday


raymi the minx says:

u can get arrested for that?




I’ve a Big One says:

well i also kicked out a window


raymi the minx says:

wow your life is like an action hero’s


I’ve a Big One says:

yeah i wish


raymi the minx says:

give me shit on toronto people


I’ve a Big One says:

most toronto people are lamos


I’ve a Big One says:

i’m going to be in a play jeremy is doing at the drake


raymi the minx says:

herehehr


I’ve a Big One says:

i am pretty much dissallowed in most social scenes in toronto


I’ve a Big One says:

i smoked the craziest shit last night


I’ve a Big One says:

i thought my brain was trying to talk to me from across the room


I’ve a Big One says:

and i realized i can’t write when i’m stoned


raymi the minx says:

dad stepped out so im gonna smoke a j now


raymi the minx says:

and caress my hangover


I’ve a Big One says:

you live with your poppa?


raymi the minx says:

yeh fer now


raymi the minx says:

fucking cat is in my face


I’ve a Big One says:

i hate that


I’ve a Big One says:

i have to live with my mom, grandma, and lil sister for now as well


raymi the minx says:

why


raymi the minx says:

cuz u are retarded


I’ve a Big One says:

very much so


raymi the minx says:

me too!


I’ve a Big One says:

not as much as me


raymi the minx says:

brb smoking j outside


I’ve a Big One says:

this girl from kitchener keeps trying to pick me up online


I’ve a Big One says:

but she is freaking me out


I’ve a Big One says:

she’s all into piercings and bondage


I’ve a Big One says:

like, fack oof


I’ve a Big One says:

it will be funnier one day


I’ve a Big One says:

when i’m all growed


I’ve a Big One says:

the girl called me vanilla


raymi the minx says:

how old is she


I’ve a Big One says:

prolly like 18 or 19


I’ve a Big One says:

she is too young and creepy


raymi the minx says:

ew gross


raymi the minx says:

my fucking cat thinks hes a mountain lion


raymi the minx says:

sorry fierce


I’ve a Big One says:

hah


I’ve a Big One says:

a few weeks before i got polluted at a vice party and asked some ttc cops if they knew

where i could buy some acid




I’ve a Big One says:

needless to say they ripped me off the train


raymi the minx says:

hahahahahahaha


i’ve a Big One says:

i shoved them and started going mental at yonge/bloor station which they required like 8 more cops to come


I’ve a Big One says:

i wasn’t even that drunk


I’ve a Big One says:

i just keep losing control



it’s the part in the relationship where you just sit back in different rooms and let shit happen on its own or you check on each other every 5 minutes and then some guy calls you a cracka and you are like do you mean honky or crackhead and he says both and he is on steroids and you are like Whaaaaaat mother effer? and he’s like your bangs your bangs and his friends step away and won’t back him anymore kuz they realise he said the wrong fucking thing and there is no saving his ass and then he fucks with yer bf not 5 minutes later not knowing we’re together and well, i hope he likes wheelchairs.

this is an audio post - click to play


If you do a cover of a Morrissey song of your choice, and put it on your blog I will mail you a photograph of mine that you can either keep or sell ( they go for a pretty penny these days).


I was hanging out in the Rodeo bar on 3rd avenue last week, started talking to a complete stranger and then all of a sudden your blog & you in general came up. Me and stranger both agreed that you are one of our most favorite people in the whole universe.


Jefferson


fat 18 year old tanned drunk moron raymi with pokey nyc



im pissed off the gary busey show isnt on til 7 30. guh. oh well. the wb shitty singers show is on and i love it love it. i coulda been one right? right. i hope tonite isnt boring. i hope my tan evens out. i hope my room gets magically clean on its own.


if i were a day of the week i’d be wednesday.


if i were a bird i’d be a hawk.


if i were a member of the cat family i’d be a cheeta. no puma. no panther. whichever one is the sexiest and moves in the slowest of motion.


if i were a band i’d be lush.


if i were a color i would be red.


if i were a toy i’d be a play-doh fun factory – this one i use to have as a kid that made play-doh ice creams and sundaes and wavy french fries and hamburgers and i remember my mum sitting on the livingroom floor with me, showing how to mix brown and white into flesh tone color for pretend hamburger buns.


if i were a dog i would be a miniature doberman pinscher.


if i were a book i’d be generation x, by douglas coupland.


if i were a country i’d be england.


if i were cake i’d be caramel crunch. it costs 20 dollars and my friend ward almost sat on one i bought for this tropical drink blending party of steve’s and i almost died of rage at him.


if i were clothing i’d be a scarf that is orange.


if i were a condiment i’d be ketchup. tho that’s pretty boring. maybe i’d be sauerkraut (sp?). but only this time not frozen with icicles outside of systems and gross bacon bits.




if i were a movie i’d be casino. fuck. man that opening scene with sharon stone where she throws up the guy’s chips in that glitzy white dress of hers and hair is up valley of the dolls style and deniro sees her, falls in love immediately even tho she is stirring up shit in his casino. also similar to the scene in trainspotting where renton falls in love with diane upon seeing her rudely drink both drinks of dude’s across the way by the bar.


if i were a gun i’d be a silencer pp7 that sexy sexy bitch. though the automatic weapons in goldeneye 007 for n64 are better. for example, the RCpm?90? whatever it’s called that shoots fat-ass lasers, super-ass fast at yer opponent’s head like mental and comes out the other side. the best is shooting the crap out of ‘em when they are already dead. the shotgun is pretty boss too.




if i were a song i’d be all of them. but especially that kanye west all falls down one. where’s that cd jonafran?


happy friday gang.


ms bojangles.