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how do i deal

if you help me figure out this problem i will buy you a fucking carton of smokes or a pet iguana, i dunno, SOMETHING cos i’m so steamed!

the bad kids come to our park all the time and they piss me off a lot, they purposely make mischief, they amped it up after me, sass and britt went and screamed at them in a drunken frustration rage. they throw glass bottles over the fence into our parking lot when fil and i are trying to drink wine and watch our yuppie tv shows, GOD those awful kids, they are destroying this one tree branch by branch and they scream, yell and pull stupid dick head kid moves for hours on end.

can i set a bear trap, or call the police? threaten to call the police? leave a scathing note? buy a bb gun? can someone come over and scare the shit out of them? can you pretend to be a scary molester stranger?

matt said i should blare siren noises through the window.

HELP ME

what is the laziest most effective non-illegal way to fix this?

this is how crazy those kids make me feel and how they view me


blarhaha no wait this too


but probably more accurately like this


but really, in my heart of hearts, i hope they see this:


that’s how you guys see me right, fearless leather-clad hero? i mean, we pose the same, hand on hip, total dead ringer.

and while i’m at it, this is how i see cid:

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