so yes i will be 23 years old soon. march 31. there will be a party for me of sorts. who wants me to mail them a postcard? the first person to email me their address gets one. ok i have two to mail. no wait this isn’t fair to people who can’t read my blog until after work. whoever pays me the best compliment in these comments will get a postcard. the runner-up compliment gets one also. i will mail the postcard at the end of the day. you are also required to scan or take a foto of the postcard, the side i write on and put it on your blog or email it to me if you don’t have a blog. (if you don’t have a blog by now you are ugly).
this is what the postcard looks like:
ps. people who pronounce mature like ma-tour and not ma-chur are animals!
oh yeah are you allowed to mail nudity? if not i will x out my nipples.
noel wants to wage an internet flame war with me. pffft.
last nite samir pointed out that i enjoy quoting myself. NOT TRUE! i mean TRUE THAT GUY!
later on in brendan’s kitchen samir drunk-yelled at me and i drunk-cried – it was over 9/11 and him being egyptian and being related to terrorists ha. brendan had a good idea to drink a bottle of this “amazing” 7 dollar bottle of wine. dude all wine tastes the same to me. we ate all his pistachios and i poured an entire bulk food bag of sunflower seeds (de-shelled) into my mouth and most of them scattered all over the floor. then geniusface makes me a vodka redbull. we argued more in the street while samir was trying to usher me into a cab like the condescending douche he is – look at me getting mad all over again.
i’m suppose to email brendan and apologize why should i samir was the one YELLING IN THE STAIRWAY AT A GIRL WHO WAS CRYING COS SHE HAS MENTAL PROBLEMS COS OF SEPTEMBER ELEVENTH AT TWO IN THE MORNING!
oh yeah after getting off the fone with jakalope i screamed like a maniac in brendan’s face and samir’s ear MWAHAHA THAT’S AMAZING THE FUNNY THING IS MY COOLNESS METER JUST ROSE IN SPEAKING TO HER! I MEAN HER FEELINGS ARE HURT…MY STREET CRED GOES UP!
brendan called jakalope last nite so i could apologize for the post i had written about her music video sucking and i think i also said that she talk-singed her stupid goth poetry, pretty funny i think and brendan agreed. she sounds like a 4 year old on the fone. i told her i was all about making fun of shit and she said well maybe you shouldn’t i dunno i said no no for entertainment purposes i wanted her to know that i wasn’t dissing her as an artist i was dissing the shitty music video which as it turns out brendan filmed or worked on i dunno. anyway i said to her i would make a public retraction on my blog about my post. i still think that video is gay but it’s not marketed to me so i understand, she’s cute she sings at things in jars and on the stairs, i’m sorry katie/jakalope.
stupid brendan showing my post to the actual artist i am making fun of NICE GOING BLOWHARD! i can’t remember if i asked her if she reads my blog, ha ha.
now i feel like a mean tabloid. wait what? good!
yeah she pretty much hates all things raymi, she wants to start an i hate raymi site. do it!
ladies try it with yer actual boob size then start over and choose the biggest boob size and choose horseriding, don’t forget to view it from another angle also. fucking brits.
my underwear is on inside-out. i don’t care. samir and i will be hanging out in an hour for the first time since redparty. when we don’t talk or write for a few days samir calls and asks if we are still friends and fil will say hey samir, remember when we were friends? yeah, that was awesome.
being insecure is the funnest.
i pretty much hate everyone today equally. my throat is all closed-up. tonite i’m going to get wasted the not-drinking-during-the-week is temporarily on hiatus for tonite because I AM TURNING TO THE HOOCH because because BECAUSE!
i need to get slammed and shit-trash the world with my peeps.
shit-talking not slammed isn’t as effective or fun.
