someone must be downloading porn here or something cos the internet is broke-city! should i exclaim aloud that i suspect someone is downloading porn? yes no?

speaking of porn, fil says i can no longer rely on my one signature porno bitches freestyle rap and that i should write some new lyrics to yell out when i am drunk raging so i think that i will do that now.

i live in toronto and i ain’t no ho but when i see a dick you know i gotsta blow

it ain’t whack it ain’t wrong i just like to hit that funky schlong

uhhh?

that’s pretty much all i got right now.

last nite i vomitted. i am never drinking jager ever again EVER! I MEAN IT THIS TIME! FOR REAL! thinking about the taste is making my stomache churn. i remember getting jealous at some point because fil had a crush on some girl in a movie like ten years ago and i wanted to make a big deal of it but everyone pretty much talked me out of that would-be tirade. i did however get a few cunty remarks in there i’m sure.

tonite we are going back to the ‘burbs for some fondue (sp?) and i am having a wonderful time nattering about saying FUN-DUE!! MORE LIKE FUN-DON’T!

last nite’s leaf game was brilliant. fil’s mum got him a leaf hat that basically looks like a retard helmet and it is the ugliest effing hat in the world which also makes it the nicest effing hat in the world.

there is a weight room in our building but the sauna is out of order and the treadmill isn’t plugged in and a table is in the middle of the room on its side and it is a creepy looking room that makes me feel like i will be raped in it so i haven’t done any working out i also gave all of my lounge pants away so i’d have to be like that stupid kid in gym class who never brought his shorts so he was playing soccer in his winter boots and jeans. i hated that kid.

i like how i got nothing but mad props for shitting my pants.

so everyone ended up making out with each other saturday nite on account of my drunklor split personality and then samir was all why won’t anyone make out with me!? and he couldn’t handle me and sharpie being trashy bulldykes at the horseshoe, but it’s not my fault, she said that i talk too much and then mouth-raped me after i shoved her up against the wall and slobbered all over her. and then after i told her and fil to kiss i immediately regretted it cos i got all jealous and on the way back in the taxi i was all DID YOU ENJOY IT TELL ME THE TRUTH!???

and everyone gave me the silent treatment and the next morning fil woke up still drunk and talked really loud and wouldn’t shut up meanwhile steve was going to jump off the balcony to go get some food cos he didn’t want to leave the door unlocked.

last nite i dreamt i ate 5 blue ecstasy pills then wandered around streetsville and went to a fancy food store and broke the coffee machine and spilled my soup everywhere but the E never kicked in and then i bumped into noel and he looked very skinny and old and then i went down to the park and yelled at noel where is my jacket and it was in my hand and then i couldn’t find my pizza and then me and fil were looking for art at sherway gardens and then i saw a guy in a tie that i recognized smoking a cigarette at the park where children were on swings and then we were driving i dunno that dream sucked.

c// says:

hey, how was your weekend?

raymi says:

pretty drunken

c // says:

nice, so you made it count?

raymi says:

hahaha

raymi says:

it was good

raymi says:

i am at an internet place and this girl is clacking the keys extremely loud and i want to explode because of it

c // says:

tell her that the keys aren’t nails and her fingers aren’t hammers

raymi says:

hahahahhaha

raymi says:

i dont think that would go over too well

c // says:

yeah probably not. if i was her, i’d type louder

raymi says:

i wish i could outloud type her but i have a quieter keyboard

raymi says:

hers is all hollow and grey mine is sleek and black

c // says:

so you got it better regardless. feel good about that

raymi says:

yes but i still have to listen to CLACK TIP TAP TAP TAP TAP CLICK CLACK

I meet people on the streets of toronto who know of you[raymi] and your fame spreads exponential inspiration through some hypertextual social need to read and write and read and write and you unite minds by accident congratulations have a dramatically enlightening non-denominational holiday