Iced out

Bonjour mes amis, comment ça va? Ca va bien?

Another day, another pandemic adventure. Let’s take it from the top.

For those unfamiliars out there, this is the Skyway Bridge and it connects us to the Promised Land: Hamilton. It is windy as Hell when crossing it and can be quite treacherous so now here’s a quick story about that. One time a few years back on a very cold day in Feb, talking minus a lot can’t remember exactly but, it was frigid, and as we were coming back toward Burlington a van driving in the opposite direction’s roof carrier flew right off (because it was empty and the winds were so strong) so we braced ourselves because we knew it was coming right our way and going to land in our lane, specifically hit our windshield. It was mega-scary and there was absolutely nowhere to go. There were cars on either side of us and you could see them wavering a little bit and fully feel the intensity of the moment because everyone saw that thing flying the wind just took it. We didn’t realize yet that it was empty though and thank god it was and because it was so cold once that thing hit the highway it utterly exploded into shards of plastic completely shattering and obliterating it into nothing so all we could do was drive through the shrapnel just fine and dandy. It was hella-terrifying like something out of the Matrix sheer panic to instant-relief. I will never forget it…. like how cheap is a roof rack carrier for your skis and what-not that it shatters like glass upon impact with the road. It was that cold out and in hindsight we were so very lucky that it was I still have visions of it sailing up in the sky and a couple cars were able to dart by it before it was our turn for it to land directly in our path and then all this plastic smacking us in the windshield. Jesus.

We went to the ass-end of the beach for a laugh. I wanted to take post-apocalyptic-looking photos of Wild Waterworks which is obvi closed for 2020 and I hope they open again someday, I guess they were closed all summer. Wow I just realized it’s not even 2020 anymore.

This is a special place, kind of a relic. One summer, I must have been 7 or so, my mom and her friend Kim surprised all us kids by packing up a van and bringing us here. I skidded my bike into our driveway, yelled up to the kitchen window, and was like MOM LETS GO! (to swimming lessons) and mom’s head popped out and she says we’re not going today and I was hella miffed because I lived for that shit I would wake up at like 6am and sit on the couch with cartoons until swimming lessons that level of excitement.

But when I realised we were going here I LOST IT. I don’t even think we knew in the car ride, maybe we did, but once you see those waterslides as a kid your brain goes AHHHHH!!!!!! Total freak out. Their hours are stupid though because one summer we decided to go (as adults) and we killed time at the beach a bit then walked the hot deserted parking lot to WW and the girl at the check-in kiosk was like come back at 4 we’ll be open. FOUR O’CLOCK? Bruh how you gonna stay in business this way?

Wally World sadness vibes.

ya no u won’t. Seems like y’all been closed a long-ass time.

Mmm yum we’ll take all 6 I don’t even know what bottom right is.

Sad.

and now for the magical part.

it me.

Hey guys, how you is? Honkity honk. Does anyone know anybody who has ever eaten a Canadian goose? Just curious…

Walked down there on the snow it was very hard and crunchy, icy. Since I’ve rolled my ankles pretty badly a few too many times I have to be careful doing the dumb things that I like to do.

So the day before we were watching that fruit loop swim in the lake and basically all of that week it was majorly cold and windy resulting in the water hitting the rocks freezing over into Narnia. Ice storms yo.

So scenic tho.

Love the details. My mom has a few photos published in a Toronto Star coffee table book about the ice storm of 2000-whatever in Oakville. I think I was in Holland at the time but anyway she’s got a keen eye and always seems to be in the right place at the right time.

I see you, cute little branches.

We have a trip planned for the weekend which we may likely cancel because of the weather conditions not gonna lie pretty bitter about it am very stir crazy right now and was looking forward to V Day weekend as am a suck hole and “I deserve it” lol goddamn Canadian winters.

Looks like some kind of dessert square edible.

Looks like some kind of dingdong.

Then we took a walk and happened upon this beautiful creation.

Love it love it love it.

The desire to smash icicles is strong but there’s not a chance in hell I’d ruin this beauty. Seasons in nature give us gifts to enjoy not destroy but the Devil in me definitely considered it.

Kissy kissy. NO I’m not fat or pregnant I’m wearing two pairs of pants and sweaters in that coat.

Just love to see it. It was warm in the sun this day but still chilly on your hands when you whip out your phone to take a picture of the fiftieth icicle installation that pops up.

Another fun thing about hiking and taking walkies is the other people who you pass and get to eavesdrop on and I am certain we give them a run for their money but it’s cute to pet their dogs and hear their chats and various dramas. I have always been curious about humans and sizing them up.

“Get a picture of me standing in this hole.”

Just when you think yer done you pass by this ridiculosity.

Okay not saying we invented it (but I kinda am) all these people started following suit when they saw what we were doing so I watched them take turns posing beside it knowing that icicles periodically fall down and make scary glass-breaking collapsing sounds so each photo pose results in a picture of terror and I stood there pretending I was none the wiser.

Beautiful.

A bunch of shit shattered loudly while taking this one I would NOT want to get hit on the head with any of that nonsense hell no. We also fed a squirrel some nuts which was a major highlight GUYS I am going nuts!

Do you understand why I cry about missing summer all the friggin’ time now? We should be drinking Sangria from Barrangas here instead of this stupid winter walk lol.

Santa was motoring it and grooving along nicely.

Now that is some enduring beach grass I have the same picture of this spot but in the summer time.

You know your bf is a hick when he puts his gloves down and you don’t know where they went.

We went for another walk at La Salle afterward but you get the point there are only so many photos of swans I can post or take.

Have a good one y’all TGIF not that it matters anymore!

Here’s a cheeky pic from skating the other day too.

and one more dramatic selfie for the road xoxo Raymbo