me:
i have to empty out the hall closet cos these guys are coming to check the something or other vent
all i did was move the hats
i dont want to unhang all the jackets and then hang them again
they are lucky you did that even
me:
DUH
i had this fantasy of being all breathless and saying oh well “i am a little lazy so i haven’t gotten a chance to clear it all away” and then they just shake their heads at me not getting my laziness joke and then it’s very awkward while they work on it and i type shit about them on my laptop
arran:
Is this one of those fantasies where you end up having a 3some with the vent repair guys?
me:
no
im actually dreading it and thinking that they are scary criminals out of a 90s voilent nyc movie and they are going to attack me and are saving our condo for last specially to rape me
arran:
you should clean the closet out then and not make them angry
me:
well i think it’s fine the way i did it
before fil left for work he was like you know u cant blow this off cos they actually have to do this cos normally when someone rings our bell i pretend im not here
people being at your door can be a scary experience
thats something crazy cat ladies say
arran:
I know what you mean though
I get like that about phone calls sometimes
me:
i always think it’s someone who wants to kill me
then it turns out to be some 13 year old who is way more nervous than i am
arran:
ya but you have pissed off a lot of 13 year olds
