Dear Raymi,
There is this guy that I really like that I see during the week, we work in the same building but not for the same company. When we run into each other we talk a little, but he doesn’t say too much. I know he likes me because I see him stealing glances at me when he thinks that I don’t know he’s around, in the cafeteria, elevators, common areas of the building.
I flirt with him and he smiles then retreats. I’ve hinted that we should go out and he always says something like, “that sounds good”, or “sounds like fun” but he never takes the hint.
From the small talk we’ve traded I know he’s not married or dating. We only see each other at my work building. How can I get him to break out of his shell and ask me out?
Thanks,
Not a shy girl
Dear Not a shy whatever
you’re full of shit you are at least a little bit shy and the fact that you’re writing me for advice proves you are completely fucking useless. anyway, this is what you do:
you: hey dude ARE YOU GOING TO GO OUT WITH ME OR NOT?
him: bwa wah wah wah wah, (runs away)
do you really want to wait around for this shit? he seems to be the type that his heart will explode if you look him in the eyes for more than two seconds and will commit suicide if you say anything remotely negative about him even as advice.
anyway, if you aren’t direct or forward straight off it’s never going to happen or some other harpie will come along and snag him. once you start dating you’ll see that he’s a super nice dude and is a great catch bla bla wait is he MY boyfriend?
I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU!
good luck.
xo raymi
