yesterday was a family dinner at chez whitehouse and i got to see rocky (cat) and he is so fucking cute i want to put him in my mouth and fil wants to throw him up in a tree so he can lay his eggs. fil tried to catch a rabbit in the backyard but he couldn’t. we played poker. i drank a lot of wine and then we watched dodgeball at fil’s and i drank more wine and passed out halfway through because i am awesome and fil had to walk me to bed and take off my clothes and i don’t remember any of that. he had to fight me out of them or something.
yesterday was my neice’s 7th birthday and today everyone is going to one of those annoying places with balls and games and creepy costumed fucks and i am not going because i have bad nerves and will most likely end up nursing a pitcher and then blowing fifty dollars just to win a green plastic comb and some gummy bears.
the last time i went there with mark and thom for beer and pizza i pretty much had an anxiety attack and fantasized about yelling at all of the children.
RAAAAAAAH!
