blow me

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hi ding dongs, your loyal leader is here. ready?

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i went back in time to my old haunt brennen demelo last friday, (the place where my blond transformation began) for a blow-out tutorial.

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as usual, i was late, no biggie, so brennen blew me. blew me out you perverts. then i went back for more on monday after a courtesy roots job (spoiled) and a blow dry tutorial which today fabfind is running a deal for you to go in for your own session, an $80 value slashed to $30 worth it and as usual, raymi gets to do everything first to demonstrate life’s finest so lets continue…

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BD will be having a relaunch pretty soon, the dudes who do the clothes are going to be moving out. big changes up in thur. i love hearing all about it i feel like i am a secret silent member on the outskirts of their cult. they all party and hang together i pretend not to be at all jealous like oh yeah totally i have my own life of parties too, but i am greedy and i like to be involved in everything if possible.

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the man himself. i was excited and nervous, i’ve never had him do my hair before, rose used to do it but i’d always stare at brennen walking back and forth in his perfect johnny depp outfits um this post is sounding like a love story. awesome. because it is. i made brennen fall in love with me.

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every baby in skulls. i would have bought that jumper but i think babies grow fast right? plus my colleague’s kid is not a girl. maybe a g’n’r tee when it’s older. haha “it”. i bought my mary locket from here. i kept weed in it. where is that thing now?

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i love my new camera oh so much. alen you are the best. i wonder if i will ever be reunited with the pen.

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i was dressed like a truck driver and i left my makeup bag at home so i was pure lesbo plain jane trucker tired eyes for the rest of the night until i changed into bridget jones.

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in this photo i look like annoying girl who shushes you in the library. annoying prude girl. i dressed even nerdier daintier than this to the bovine sex club once and picked up like every girl there. JUXTAPOSE 2011 Y’ALL. oh right back to hair. clipping it like this is such a drag but if you take the extra time to section/separate then the hair gets drier and therefore less strain on your puny arms you weakling housewife. that’s right i said it. housewife. wife of a house. i ran out of thinking medicine today sorry.

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dudes of matching hair feathered, flock together. i am totally going to rethink this outfit in the future do not worry. it’s the plaid shirt, it’s a size 2 or something retarded i bought it like a month before i started working with cheese boutique and then all my size 2 shirts turned into size 4 and then 6 shirts anyway this one buttoned up on me looks like a dude slept over and had to put your clothes on the next day to go to the bathroom and your roommates see, basically any rom com ever involving owen wilson.

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here we go much better, hello monday.

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kinda tinier after friday and saturday’s back-to-back tmr sessions (i discovered last night that i have stripper upper-ass/lower-back muscle now). this outfit is also semi-truck driver inspired but more so winter cabin doing dishes and transporting logs. um, i live in my head way too much.

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brennen said it’s ok for all the partying i/we do. you work super hard you have to party super hard to balance it out. i wonder who would win in a party battle, me or him?

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i don’t know how but my eyebrows were nicely tinted on monday all on their own and by the way i rediscovered my dimples yesterday and practiced in the mirror beside my bed. i am going to land so many more deals now just wait and see and when i go to speak at streetsville high to a class on how i made it big i will say all that regular shit i say but i will impress on the importance of dimples, knowing their power, and when to use them.

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summer wheatley rounded bangs. sitcom bangs. tv watching bangs.

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things look more serious from below. the subject is thinking. she is brooding. shit is serious.

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mmm yes.

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you can see one of my cute beauty marks.

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my turn. if this one doesn’t say stepford slave then i don’t know what people.

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brennen was impressed by my skills. i said i used to round brush blow my hair all the time as a teenager. my mom started me young. i got highlights for the first time in grade, 7 or 8? once you start you can’t stop. ps. um ladies, brennen is the one who will have his hands on you when you have your blow out tutorial not to be a pimp or anything but, the dude is fine.

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he was talking to me and the dryer’s fan was blowing his hair back like a fucking harlequin book cover and i was like um can you keep doing that i have to take a picture of it. ok that’s nice now, can you do that again but this time, take all of your clothes off. right meow.

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these aa pants had a tear on them when i bought them. instead of being a priss i just sewed it up so my pants have a scar. also fyi you are the opposite of invisible when you wear red pants on a snowy day so prepare yourself for that.

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i kept getting prettier and prettier. brennen confirmed this.

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i kept flashing game show smiles at myself and then busting up laughing from embarrassment because it was too believable.

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woah this one’s severe like, just beneath the surface, she may buckle under the pressure meanwhile brennen is obsessing over his work.

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by summer my hair will be mid-back length.

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so get out of my goddamn way when that happens i will be royally egotistical so however much you like me now enjoy it as it will be depleted day by day by day leading up til then. the longer your hair the more vain you are, my crazy friend told me once. crazy friend? which one, i know right.

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looks darling all clipped up.

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finishing spray.

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and voila, good to go. take care now, bye bye then.