FACEBOOK EVENT INVITE if we aren’t already fb buds.

you can have your “special” “real” birthday dinner in the big bad city like you always fuckin’ do or you can put some distance between yourself and it.

no road hhead.

and now where are we? so swank!

i love weird. i know i was talking about how unphased i am by weird before but that’s because i am a dickhole. weird is great. out of comfort zone? splendid! throw in a mass exodus of people in a lit-up carnival-style tourist trap built around one of the seven wonders of the world? stop it my brains are orgasming. plus you get to say all night long IT’S MY BIRTHDAY.

this conversation SERIOUSLY took place. make a right the falls are that way. (as he’s turning left) no no RIGHT. him: how do you know? silently, maniacally, i gesture wildly at sign stabbing air with world’s most pointed finger ever. OH you mean those falls. i just packed a bowl so this is gonna get jokey. someone asked me how long these posts take which i interpret as what is wrong with you aka how DO you do it raymi? more so, why/how? or my other favourite which i invented, “why come?” well i can tell you how at least, for now, and it rhymes with carijuana.

um if the kingdom is lost how did those birds get found?

so many pictures of the same shit over and over at different times of day it was literally like going in circles. they cram everything so close together for all the lazy suburban tourists.

blues brothers 101.

home base.

kissing insane disney times square what the fuck is going on? street.

all work and no play make raymi something something.

get ma pose on.

27 in there. as previously mentioned, i am now a member of eligible for the 27 club (wikipedia it i am too lazy right now to hyper-link) also another member of that club whom i admired for many a year during mainly some formative ones, my tattoo has some cobain significance surely, (and g-ma) it’s nirvana weekend all weekend long (deathiversary) on some buffalo rock station, etc etc. now luckily i ignore coincidences and am not superstitious but i can’t help but to feel a little jinxed. i already drove myself literally insane once before thinking things “meant” something. that is all.

viewtastic.

i like the greek olympiad architecture. such a gladiaor boner, russell crowe. fuck yeah.

oh hi oh hi.

see how a bra turns me into a friggin’ cartoon character bunny stripper?

kinda scurry.

you get used to it.

one of us has heights phobia. what’s the actual term for that?

ok we get it.

free birthday shit. welcome to niagara falls here’s CN TOWER chocolates: the place you shoulda went. ahhaha.

maple, of course. no irony included. this would be the beginning of non-stop shit consummation. no wait that truck stop was, he got dairy queen i had tim horton’s. i consider that garbage too.

i so over-packed. 1. i am a girl 2. as my moods change i change my clothes 3. i over-think and over-plan, i worry about potential changes in climate, atmosphere, destination it’s annoying but so what. i am a canvas and i like to reinvent. i don’t do boring. i need variety.

just crap upon crap all stacked atop one another. i love it. slow tourists, i do not. they’re so STUPID. MOVE GUY GET OUT OF THE FUCKIN’ WAY CITY WALK COME ON. i swear to god their brain only works when their feet is in motion. the lights aren’t even on and no one is fucking home. it’s their diets i think and their kids and the giving up, settling. just.can’t.take.another.step.or.make.another.decision. but please just shuffle out of the path of foot traffic you lazy sloth. FUUUUUUUUCK. it didn’t bother me this time around actually, wasn’t crabby at all, it totally amused me. i felt smug as shit and content. don’t think you wouldn’t either.

we didn’t go inside any of this shit. no wax museum, no haunted house no nothing. just candy stores, a bar, casino, strip joint, some lounge then another bar. we got right crushed. left my camera in the hotel for those things though. it was like a vacation from myself.

GAAAAAHHBLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!

oh yeah a cabbie sang me happy birthday on our way back from vice lounge (where they played all the songs i wanted to hear, and accidentally twice haha) he was getting nervous about it and kept trying to bail on his singing commitment but i kept egging him on even though i felt shy too.

went here today to get some junk. i love the rock heads, so grotesque.

james hetfield’s all RAAAAAHHH! and maddona’s like LIFE IS A MYSSSSSTERRRRYY! and elvis goes huu-aaaay bebe real slow and croony while marley takes an enormous dump.

vedder looks great HAHAHHA

mick is hilarious too and whoever drew tina just plain old gave UP.

great back drops everywhere.

no tourists in sight. this street is like a block too far for them and it’s so not even far away either.

yuh-oo-hoo sweet little aryan girl it’s Das Führer. huh what?

not today dude you look mahfuckin’ grouchy. yeah i’m gonna go ahead and put that little corner over there in the BUZZKILL category.

kinda played the you find it you get to pose with it game for a bit.

such a fucked up place i adore it.

went to the very first bar in niagara. totally forget the name of it.

hmm what’s going on tonite oh, nothing? that’s what i figured.

I’M WHAT’S GOIN’ON NIGGAS!

i need to start hangin’ with younger non-shaky handed dudes.

red flag couldn’t get over it. what? makes total sense to me. consider the territory.

i read the components to this appetizer and kinda got ADD halfway through right at the part where ANCHOVIES began. such a retarded concoction. whatever. don’t let stoners design your menu.

woman said they were known for their wings. is that right? so you’re known for mediocrity? WIIIILD. then she essentially cornered us into complimenting how great they were. lying to strangers is fun.

lets do this.

glow in the dark mini golf in a place like this? yawn.

oh god i am so craving more sweets. is that how it starts? we ate so much retarded shit. for me totally out of the norm. lots of chocolate candy. so good.

i love photographing these they always photograph well. i’d never eat one though.

i am not a product of consumer victimization. well, not in places like these. all it is is a dressed up variety store with a few fudge showcases. mmmmmm fuuuudge.

i am mawing down the caramel candies kamila threw in that bag of clothes thanks to these pictures like, i cannot unwrap them fast enough hahaha.

alright i’ll can the hate for a sec and admit this is quite high in the adorable department.

oh jesus.

a syropy sweet sugary rich sugar cone rolled like a doobie dipped in rich chocolate oh right and filled with caramel.

peanut butter cookie pop that i ate the shit out of.

something doesn’t sit right about this one.

i guess i’m too sensitive.

no i mean it I AM!

of course.

that’s more like it.

costume change. had to dress for casino-friendly/strip club friendly simultaneously as we were not coming back to the hotel. got some interesting insight from this evening. specifically in a “bringing a big mac to fat camp” type way when bringing someone who looks like me to a strip club. some sneers for sure (at RF not me, me i got pure love haha) BUT the girls will outright avoid you so no pushy lap sitters. such a great scene (all of it, everywhere) to be on mdma by. away from the city and any and all chance of claustrophobia, insecurity. anonymity can be great. looking into the falls pie-eyed is pretty amazing too.

had several outfit selections, settled on subtle french understated slutty. people look more in the burbs i find. in the city this outfit is like, nothing. speedwalking to the bathroom with your eyes shyly at the floor cos you know tables and tables of blackjack are gawking, well, i don’t know where i’m going with this. i’m a goddamn spectacle and i’m trying to get used to it. i have good posture and i walk with purpose, you notice me. i notice this happening and i guess being way too self aware to begin with, shy, plus high kinda puts it over the edge. this picture is awful though i hate my ear tucked out like that and i look tired as shit in the face.

everywhere i go my bags just explode all over the room.

can you imagine being blissed out high as crap at a slot machine with lights and music blasting all around you and then you win two hundred dollars. high on top of hilarious high.

thanks for the goose adil and for your friends thinking i looked like kate hudson in the magic pony video tour.

uh i think it’s working.

time to get out of this room. making fun of how i used to always photograph myself.

after sundownders and vice lounge we went to dj’s and they had freestyle hip hop nite with three guys standing around with mics and one little twerp with an 80’s hair metal guitar jammin’ away it was HILARIOUS and i danced a little grimey ghetto for them with that gold chain and leather jacket and heineken in my hand just a little bit. i’m a wigger’s delight that i am. the chicks were not feeling their territory being compromised. at the vice lounge i had a stripper complex with some of my dance moves where back home (toronto) it is outright encouraged to dance like a stripper, i feel, and totally acceptable. whereby, in the big N Falls, if a chick is dancing like a stripper in a bar, guess what, she’s a stripper.

the moon looked magnificent, and you could feel the air was getting warmer even by the falls it was such a bonus.

everything felt amazing. i took nothing for granted. i enjoyed myself immensely.

that’s the last picture i took for the evening. round two tomorrow.

speaking of, my little old birthday jam is tomorrow nite at THE CENTRAL 9.30PM. i have a blythe cake too that i haven’t seen yet it’s going to be a surprise reveal and all the girls are going to be dressed as slutty bunnies as it’s good friday (my idea! IDEA HOG MEMEME) and i’ll be dressed like one too so come dress up, dress down, dress slutty, go big you know me i love camp. it’s going to be dangerously fun. bring anyone you like, don’t be shy! we’re gonna go all night and we have the entire upstairs, with patios. it’s going to be amazingly warm too. directions here:

this is melodie’s chain what i borrowed. need to find my own.

uploading over a hundred pics right now and only from day one. will wheedle down to a more modest number. had suuuch a blast. red flag won over 200 bucks at the casino which essentially was free money anyway cos i was cashing out and he was set to just blow it all and leave to our next destination. man how i love cheesy touristy shit. you can only do that stuff if you’re in on the joke and not a depressed nuclear failure of a family bitching the whole way through. felt so free i swear, it was totally a good idea to ghost town it up mid-week. slide show with witty stupid captions comin’ right up. i got to wear shorts today and even got some colour. balls awesome!

so far, 27 rules.

today is going to be epic. friday too will be epic. i’mma tell you all about it tomorrow. basically get ready for a blackout drunkening and don’t expect to make any good use of what saturday’s gorgeous weather is going to have in store. your call though, miss a great night, or miss a great day? as if more fabulous weather isn’t on its way. it’s going to be a wicked summer.

my cousin leigh is going off to bali and china and she may not return. i was talkin’ to her ex who showed with a massive gash (from the nite before or before that?) on the bridge of his nose i was all like here man have a whiskey this is brutal, there’s your girl, my cousin, ugh awkward. anyway i was like what happened? someone was talkin’ shit, essentially, my memory is foggy and he capped it off with the quote of the evening, “i like to keep it scarborough, what can i say?” and thanks to sofi i learned that jane and finch is so not scarborough. I KNOW MY SHIT! leigh says i am doin’ the family proud what with my writing and other things, it was sweet to hear.

pretending to slave drive. oh clem, as if i listen to you.

this is how i look hung. obvious? don’t answer that.

start practicing your dirty dancing to this one. just tryin’ta gear you up!

thanks spliffanie!

re-post!

cool pose! that thing fits way better now, it got shrunk. a size zero and no fucking way it’d fit ever again though, i likely wouldn’t have shrunk it then eh.

should i bring my laptop and blog from the hotel throughout tonite’s pisstankening?

the craziest rudest shit happened to me today. i’ll share the story another time though don’t want my spirits to be harshed i is be gwan’in rasta me k’yant be talkin’ nyaw popa-tranzin’ hahaha sorry there, sorry.

this room, when all the light goes through it i can actually feel the endorphins flood throughout my body and serotonin release in my brain, it is amazing, as a depressed person to actually notice it. i clomp up the stairs thinking about all the shit i have to do, open up the doors and then it all melts away ahhh.

and it stays like that for hours. purely a sunroom. every time melodie comes to hang in my opium den she sighs and says i’m so lucky and that she’s jealous. aw. the sunroom at cedar grove gave me vitamin D highs like nothing other as well, constant good feeling in this room is what i’m saying. the bed is so comfortable i think i’m getting rickets.

jesus seriously wept when i tried this on. puma wraps my tits in the most spry of ways i think asthma got cured for a second there.

off the shoulders is how this’ll be worn.

an unrelated quote from a chat i just had, spake by me of course: i go for crushingly devastatingly handsome types because i know it will end in fucking flames, knowing that it can and only will be temporary is a thrilling sadness.

tomorrow (today) i am off to the border. may hit a strip bar. casino. hotel. maybe i’ll pull out my tooth and wake up with a tiger in the bathroom.

it’s been an interesting fuckin’ year.

happy birthday asshole.

TORONTO! FUCK YEAH HOMOS!

thanks jamie!

oh, hi.

met halfway at jack astors by bloor/yonge. my old stomping grounds. tattoo culture is by pape station so i was all uuuh where can we go, what the fuck is at bloor yonge? short term city memory for sure. this is the beached drink. nice. ryan the bartender tried to jack it up for me (hard sneaky up-sell, didn’t fall for it) and oh fuck yeah J. astors is for wieners but what can you do when you’re in a rush? the pepsi of the bar & food industry, that’d be the one.

puh-retty goddamn true.

pretend to be tourists. always.

toldja the sound academy would come through. another d-bag moment, oh ho, so humble now, what, you mean everyone’s name doesn’t get printed on drink tickets?

later on my man brought 8 more replete with raymbo personalization. good to go.

who we here for again? oh yes, spoon. opening guys were the strangeboys (fun dance tunes!) then deerhunter (who knew? not me. very british invasion them guys) then spoon. i’m liking live music again and guess who’s to thank, the central. i love dancing and i love good times. overdid it in the live music department for a good two or so years there, can’t tell one band from the next and the last but more so, just yeah, not feeling toronto crowds or i was just goin’ with the wrong people. sorry friends don’t take it to heart. if you’re rollin’ with me it’s gonna be a shit show (blast) and you had better be dancing so you best be checking your insecurity with your coat cos no one else is gonna be (dancing) til the encore rolls around.

so we did the math, based on the vip show hook up plus drank tickets plus cab fare had we not not been set up last nite would have been a dickload pricier but it was so solid, therefore, who cares? we had a time is what. both pleasantly surprised. probably had the best time out of everyone there and likely the most ignorant of all acts doin’ their thang up there on stage. i think they call that irony. i think music, bands, everything is at such a boiling point right now it’s like EVERYTHING is good therefore NOTHING is good, too much choice and selection. it really doesn’t matter who you’re seeing or where you’re going, you’re going out to have a good time, and then you have one. case closed. everyone delivers.

spotlight on those guys.

i hated my outfit last nite. i forgot to wash my shorts, well, attempt to shrink them so they were just way too bulky with my teensers waist and shirt there i had to do a lot of hands on hips posing to let everyone know how fuckin’ lanky i actually am.

these were the tights i was too insecure to wear to the harlettes audition because of one barely audible run. well, audible cos it was stand alone stand out and so decided to alter my look. it changed over the course of the evening.

unwrapped perhaps a little prematurely but i got too in my head about dancing with a blue bandage on.

the strangeboys brought it.

the real show’s over here.

here too. once my face finally goes to shit, look out p0rn.

mugger.

i want to hug you. lets never fall out again, promise?

see this is why i hated my outfit, everything is the wrong size compiled.

dear penthouse…

i was essentially trashed all day. up down all around. tattoo nerves sedation, over-tired, hung, over-worked, over-played.

wow. what an unbelievably original and unique pose.

why doesn’t anyone hang out over there? can i next time?

guy who “wasn’t hitting on me” apparently is throwing a party in a couple weeks where crystal castles are playing. then he got kicked out for being too slaughtered.

slootsky slapped my tattoo. if i get infected brah…

take more photos!

zach looks like an ex boyfriend of mine who i f-ing hate so it’s kinda hard to look at him. i still gave him some drink tickets cos i am super nice (was loaded enough) like that. send me those pics guy.

back upstairs.

spoon. amazing. and deerhunter were sooo good but spoon you took it for sure. by a hair. very close tie. spoon had a radiohead thing going strong. each band was perfect to be shitty by. had a lot of fun and i rarely bother to mention these things about shows or anything period i’m too busy scowling at everyone who isn’t dancing and thinking about when we get to finally fucking leave. not no more!

holy fuck. haha that’s what i feel like when i sit at a computer ALL THIS CREATION POSSIBILITY IT’S SO ENDLESSSSS

jeeesus.

off to the beav for erykah badu album party and a costume change.

dutty had to point out what his shirt was actually of. chick thighs ass poon.

gonged.

good news there’s a zit on the end of my nose too. have yourself a rice krispie square from the beaver they have nuts and sunflower seeds in them. chase it with a cookie. dance like a de-railed locomotive.

fuck it, tomorrow i’m 27.

lets see if i make it to 28.

deck building

stephen shaw brrrap brap! awesome! will tell you the meaning behind it and all that in a little bit. busy busy busyyyyyyyy.