Hello hello hello!

Thanks for riding through my crash-out the other day I am better now. Everything is sorted and booked all I gotta do is ride my anxiety adrenaline thru the airport and visualize standing in lines and not sleeping and hearing noises oh god I exhaust myself. I have charged my earpods.

I’m not gonna prepare a speech just well, prepare something, I am collecting funny anecdotes to mention and memories to share. Yesterday I recited an entire Ted Talk on grief during my walk and it actually flowed rather nicely but ion think it would go that way in reality. The last time I spoke at a funeral I was Courtney Love-coded. This time I plan to be more chill but we won’t know for certain until we see how much sleep I get tomorrow night.

Today’s agenda is another powerwalk then decide what to pack MINIMALLY do my nails watch Love Island USA whiten teeth lift weights make my kale before it goes bad I guess check-in for our flights, accept the fact that the money I spent on this is worth it and don’t be bitter or angry that traveling within Canada is so fucking criminally expensive like wtf two grand for flights/hotel coulda gone to friggin’ literally anywhere ok ok chill there’s opportunity for that another time don’t be such a Debbie Downer. Real talk, I am still grieving the loss of my friend and I am mad that I am going back again this summer which was the plan to visit again but not like this. Now that i’m not a shut-in alcoholic loser anymore I actually want to do things and would have enjoyed having my friend around longer for that. I am able to compartmentalize it better because I don’t live there but this past week has brought up all the feelings I’ve been suppressing. Whatever that’s life and apparently I need to grow up.

You have lived quite the life

— Lorazafan (@lorazafan) June 4, 2026

yes I have. when ppl say I do nothing I look back at all this shit and say I have done enough buddy. next chapter is pretty excellent too. ps. below deck finale, i cried.

— RAYMI THE MINX (@raymitheminx) June 4, 2026

pic.twitter.com/aU6Jnhxegh

— RAYMI THE MINX (@raymitheminx) June 4, 2026

I remember every mean thing that ever gets said to me and it happens often. I’m sick of it. I will vent about that another day though. I try not to be defensive but you can tell in the way I write I am always defending myself. People need to catch up and recognize that I ain’t taking their shit anymore and that this is who I am. Period.

Okay I’m over it time to hydrate BYE FELICIA

What’s your favourite Blue Jays jersey colour on me?

The post I’m in a fight with myself and winning appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

Hey what’s good I feel lost right now maybe I will find myself writing on my blog — feel like I’ve reached the ceiling today posting fb memories and getting lost in the abyss of twitter (X, whatever) notifications holy hell being niche twitter famous is an investment in time management of which I have none but anyway it’s interesting trying to cover all bases with a variety of nature videos selfies memes garbage reality tv hashtag opinions (specifically Euphoria, Below Deck, and whatever else I am bingeing quickly and instantly forgetting all about) reply guys blue jays food pics dog videos cats walks and then talking to my weirdo friends from the internet and irl, what a privilege it is to be me.

I am “finding myself” here now as well because I am actively avoiding doing something that I have long since put off all month or so and now it’s D day week to get’er done so I am pro-crastibating with the blog post but it’s okay I got a loose system in place here there’s pieces in motion ahah okay stoner mystery speak just shut up. I will let you know when I am ready I am trying to minimize damage always it’s like, a must, with the big mouth that I got and the stupid crap that I do plus no filter. I am flooded with that feeling of dread like it’s the night before your essay is due that you did fuck all all month long for. I carry that feeling almost daily lol.

I’ve just gotta book some flights and hotels and co-ordinate all that together and like use my brain and focus two things that I do not at all enjoy doing in the slightest you know that song I just want to bang on my drum all day, that’s the quintessential definition of my belief systems + life practices essentially, if I don’t do the opposite of “locking-in” I will basically crash out. Which sucks but I don’t make the rules I can only follow them and so normally my buddy would be holding my hand throughout all of this and guiding me but he is dead now so it’s ironic that I have to adult-it solo-mish in order to make it to his celebration of life this weekend and I am taking my brother because I don’t want to go alone and we know my mom is gonna flip out so I didn’t want to say what it is that I am panicking over because I don’t want to deal with that hassle – I suffer enough from travel anxiety as is.

See how much OCD people/anxious people torture themselves? It’s very real. Talking about it helps alleviate it. I saw that Deena and Vinny on Jersey Shore (which I am bingeing right now I can’t believe I didn’t already mention it above they are dominating my parasocial circle at the moment) suffer from what I suffer too: anxiety & OCD and lately I’ve been thinking I am AUDHD so when I see my shrink later this month I will be hard-launching the rest of my neuro-spiciness onto her see how that goes. Trying to get as many diagnoses over here and break some records jkjk.

When I die (knock on wood) I think that my brain should definitely be studied for science and if only there was a way they could later on tell me about it like how Walt Disney is waiting around for them to cure dying. lol aw I get it. If I were Walt Disney I would totally want to stick around.

I spoke with a few friends yesterday and Mel was over (i’m in the country right now he’s a buddy from town friend of bf’s and mine) and I fielded a few calls from various people after a few on auto-pilot I hung up and said and now that is how I get thru my day lol I am like a prisoner trapped in this cog of wheels that do not stop turning in my head it’s kind of exhausting but I am used to it by now when I have a moment of pause to reflect a wave of fatigue tries to settle and it’s like I could either sleep for a hundred years OR I could get up and do infinity fucking arm curls right now LFG then I’ll try to see how long I have been sitting hunched over for and if I need to pee so I’ll get up. I remember as a kid not being able to sleep at night and now I know why. I mean, I would lay awake thinking about all kinds of shit knowing everyone was sleeping I didn’t recognize this as racing thoughts dressed up as insomnia. It’s brutal. I can’t even sleep with my boyfriend. People who can fall asleep while I am on edge alert from the quiet tick of a clock and the hum of a fridge. I can identify every little noise in your house but then other times I am kinda deaf. Next post we can discuss my declining memory. Oof.

Okay is any of this neurotic bullshit even interesting I dunno just please don’t tell my mom yet until I talk to my brother and book my flights okay this is your test if you rat me out you’re banished from the Raymi fan club, I’m revoking your special ring.

See ya later haters!

Update: flights booked $1484. Hotels next.

Jules and I over a decade ago. She just got married sorry.

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it’s a rush when the pieces start pieceing.

200 days. it’s like that 200 cigarettes movie except not.

I just checked my blog traffic and it’s um, quite high, lol.

Over the years I have spun my wheels on various social media platforms to maintain my online presence, yes, all those years being a covert watcher non-participant was all for this very look-at-me moment.

thx twitter. remember when i vowed to do less of you lol. it’s at 80k now i wish i was monetizing fackkkk me. soon. you will pay for these words lol. lol? yep. lol all the way to the bank!

Whatever, what do you say to people anymore on the internet here? I feel like I am split personalities everywhere I am. Twitter? that’s ratchet Raymi. Facebook? a little classier, just a little. Instagram, there I am most attention-seeking of all. The possibilities of instagram are endless if you are clever enough and I feel as though I am hunting for my next big thing over there but this time as delusional as that sounds, I’ma make it LOL.

You have to big yourself up if you’re gonna achieve anything and within the crazy there is excellence of fuck I dunno, something just finally lands right. I took my hat out of the ring for a long time but now I am here to announce that I am a gun for hire and if you want some of that overspill shine come and get it. That Hansel is so hot right now as they say.

I remember years ago in my twenties having arguments “business discussions* with potential VC’s about my brand and it boiled down to with one person the “get hit by a car theory” that if they invested all this into me and then I go and died on them. Okay that was more than 20 years ago I am still here buddy. Do you think they told that same shit to HANNAH MONTANA, LADY GAGA, HILARY DUFF, literally anyone better and more deserving than me? Likely not.

Also what is my brand what am I giving the world who DO tenaciously read and follow along, potential cu$tomers I have all been long-conning love-bombing for fucking years. All I am asking (begging) is for an editor to give me a writing collaborator to help organize a book. Then proceed from there. This is how I level up. I am going to take cues from the manosphere to blogmaxx my potential and as my my physique tones tans and hair grows all at once combining to dominate my comeback arc. It’s giving main character.

What would Pee-Wee Herman do? Exactly!

Podcast. Another thing I was always thinking to do because I love a good blabbity blah and it’s truly always an adventure plus I would have a different person on each podcast episode as they do, some being old Raymi characters. Could you imagine if I featured exes and haters? um no. it would flow just like a phone call and be as simple as it could possibly be because that is all the energy I can muster, too many moving parts, it aint happening.

Okay gonna cut this short it’s tan o’clock my homies.

Just remember, go thru life with the passion dedication and self fucking confidence as a crazy rich successful person might. To soar you must jump and to jump remove the fear. I will try to stop being a life coach (no I won’t). Spreading wisdoms always!

See ya

ps I think I’m going to take dance classes again. just putting it out there.

The post 200 days appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

We’re not suppose to romanticize or glamorize alcohol or drinking or drug stories during meetings when sharing but this aint no meeting so i’sa spin some yarns here so gather ’round sumn other okay just kidding I’ll type with real words, not in minxlish. I’ll try.

I’m watching the last man on earth right now and they’re drinking Scotch on a boat it brings to mind the kind of person who you drink Scotch with, someone you just know you’re being drug down to Hell with them for a Scotchy drunkies and there is no fightin’ it, with that there powerful spirit dawg you is in it. Scotch is like the K-hole of drunks. If you don’t know what a k-hole is it’s when you do Ketamine and you’re in a bubble and you cannot get out that’s why it’s called a hole. Not a good time. Mormons do it tho which is weird. They can’t have caffeine or alcohol but they do Ketamine “treatments”. Maybe that’s just the Mormon housewives show and not actual reality. A lot of my education sadly derives from reality television.

We did Scotch Fridays at the office. We even had a Scotch log and to be in Scotch Club you had to get a bottle on a Friday no one had got before and enter it in the Scotch spreadsheet log, that’s about it (we took turns but sometimes there would be two bottles to go around, deadly) then you get fucking gassed with your coworkers in the board room and if you’re the only woman like me then you are in charge of cheese and crackers for the piss tanks who turn into little toddlers, fuck, emails stop dead sharp at 4pm on Fridays — you have zero ability to write shit about fuck whilst on Scotch (I attempted to do our tweets, bad call lol) and then welp, lets call the plug and get his ass on over here ahh good times, good times, work hard play hard. Hangovers at an office are the worst days of your life. Shaking like a leaf, no sleep, you look rough and you don’t remember meetings you’ve had… sending emails out to coworkers about deliverables you’ve already heard word back on wtf.

I was never a Scotch person. Scotch people are made not born. You gotta brace yourself for the most disgusting shit you will ever taste and I’m not sorry either to admit that. I’m an alcoholic and I have tasted the shit rainbow of every kind of alcohol known to human, it’s all poison. You acquire an affinity for that you don’t get born craving it.

Peat? Smoke? Barley? …burning gasoline no different than moonshine make ya go blind? Yeah no that ain’t delicious. Have it with ice, that’s me. Some, a drop of water, some, just neat.

I like to twirl my glass around like some bastard in a sumptuous den wearing a cable knit chooch cardigan sweater fuck can you say dry drunk much? I guess after 197 days without booze you start to romanticize it a little bit.

On the train into the city Friday I sat beside the right chick it was perfect social harmony killing time til we got to Union station, she says, I smell alcohol and I said it isn’t me! This is the only time ever without a shadow of a doubt that it isn’t me she says oh youre an alcoholic oh good I love alcohol I laughed and said um I don’t think you know what you think that means but I said yes i love alcohol too, too much so I cant drink it anymore. I love a nice drink in a pretty glass a gorgeous cocktail perfectly crafted, mixologist porn I can recite circles around you about booze. I liked that she admitted to loving alcohol but she can drink it “normally” sorry, “enjoy” it responsibly, as alcohol marketing would have you hear.

which brings me to my next reveal which I was saving for THE BOOK.

At the beginning of the pandemic when I moved from Toronto to Burlington I worked for the LCBO, I was an essential worker. Me. Queen Smirnoff at the Liqbo (and I kept it secret from the internets). I am planning to deconstruct my time period of secretly working for 3 years in the lions den of hooch as a lush. I had to resign. They will come for me when I say what I got to say. I mean. I didn’t sign any NDAs and I don’t plan to lie about it — it’s my truth and my story. So fuck them I’m not scared. I learned a lot. It was good, it was bad, then it was ugly. I realized I am a very anxious person and being around alcohol as an alcoholic was like that girl who fell in a volcano, bitch, you too damn close.

However, obviously being an alcohol expert came in handy when recommending drinks from wine to tequila, beer, fucking everything, you name it, I drank the store. I am a living breathing database of wine, spirits, beer, ciders & RTD (ready-to-drink) knowledge. What do you wanna eat with that shit? I know that too. How hammered do you wanna get and money u wanna save blah blah all useless to me now. I’ve drank my last drink but I can still talk about it like how I fixate on foods and tv programs and internet garbage. Everything is alcohol to me now.

The inspiration of this post was Scotch. Mostly the drunken overpowering feeling of a Scotch drunk. The first couple sips you know what you’re getting into. Do not make plans, you are going nowhere. You will sound and look like Homer Simpson. Nothing you say will make any sense, you sound like a total idiot, and you won’t remember any promise or plan you made. And you’ll do it again despite the mega-hangover.

Vodka though. She was the one that really took me out. That’s a tale for another time.

Adios muchachos. Enjoy your Sunday.

If you’re struggling just know I have been there before and I am here to talk and tell you that you’re worth it and not alone and you can stop drinking. If you’re irritated just walk away, don’t let that glass of wine be the only thing that can get you through your life.

ps. leave me a comment here and tell me where you found this blog, my visits are skyrocketing right now so someone linked me someplace, but where? fucking tell me! actually might just be organic natural traffic coming from all my social feeds okay whatever i’m just a very curious need to know things type of person.

xo raymi

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I have this rule that I seldom remember but I am trying and it is to blog when I am crashing out hard on various social media platforms as in INSTEAD of pissing people off over there draw them here to RTM.com if they want more raymi doses of crazy and while I’m at it, it is so sad that I am unlearning shit I use to strongly preach “if my blog needs a blog kill me” as in twitter and facebook FUCK I am trying so bad to bring it back to basics.

Take this drawing for example. Don’t just AI it. Don’t google it. Learn a new font and create it yourself.

DAILY AFFIRMATIONS. Try it. If you’re spiraling out, write. I remember writing this when I was furious not gonna say at whom but now looking back at these it appears to be a positive thing instead of screaming into the void aka more rageahol pointless texts and now we have these to look at. Maybe I should apply them to reality. I was feeling attacked and guilty for doing whatever necessary to be happy to be me to fucking exist I dunno.

These are the equivalent of sticky notes people put on their bathroom mirrors and read while brushing their teeth to get motivated for the day to CRUSH IT. It’s cute when you read one of these pump you up sayings you’re like DAMN STRAIGHT I WILL PAT MYSELF ON THE BACK FOR THAT MINOR THING I WAS PROCRASTINATING ON. One of my favourite in-recovery things we are taught (also while struggling in active addiction) is to give ourselves grace and be gentle with ourselves. Never been taught that before normally we just accept that we are pieces of shit who made bad decisions. Turns out, you’re allowed to flip the script and be a buddy to yourself, check in, not out!

This one speaks for itself. I try to write out things I find to be a little more original so that it’s out there that my brain thought of it first. I’ve come up with lots of firsts of course but that’s enough bragging for today. Back to blasting Peter Gabriel now to get thru this crappy rainy weather xoxo your pal rlw.

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