Hello my lovelies, ready set go for some more snow? The moral of this blog post is appreciate what you have while you have it ‘cos when it’s gone, bro it’s GONE. Okay that’s a little dramatic all I mean is it’s sunny and warm out now all this snow is goners.

I swear if I ever saw a turtle scale that steep hill to cross this road? My God.

The parking lot of Dundas Valley is/was covered in snow. We were stoked. Haven’t been here in years and will spare you the who gets credit for this super wicked fun idea for a day LOL but obviously me. It would have been nice to add YOU ARE HERE on the map before heading out to the multiple criss-crossing trails of D Valley but mebbe that’s just me. We got a little lost but google maps is shockingly accurate, yay that.

You tell me where you think we are on this map and I’ll give you a quarter.

My Grandfather, Dad’s Dad, his name is JRW, John White, so this was special and saved our asses on the way back also might I add the degree of difficulty for this trek was quite something because of the snow we had to clomp through. We were winded after the first incline and then discovered there would be a fuck ton more hills and kind of went mad. We stuck to Sawmill trail for the most of it then it got wonky and we were going it blind.

It was a beautiful hike that’s for sure. We did not bring enough snacks or beverages/water in case we got lost-lost in hindsight and we laughed about that the entire time. There is nothing worse than getting stuck somewhere and being hungry. All I thought about to mentally motivate myself through the end of this hike was the Thai stir fry I was going to make when we got home. It was delicious.

I’ve gotten new boots since and would love to break them in here! Kicking local snowbanks can only do so much for a girl.

Break one. You get to see the serious walkers out and about when you go for a stroll through the hills yeah and this one guy came through in leather shoes and leather jacket no hat no mitts we were like WTF LOL. Meanwhile a group of serious loud-talking walking ladies that you can hear an entire kilometer away because it’s so silent there completely engulfed in nature if you are currently going bonkers from being indoors too much and want an escape, I recco a hike. You might see deer.

It doesn’t look like much but this incline killed us it’s only half of it as seen from above very humbling we were dying AND we hike all the damn time. The snow helped and hurted us.

Canadian Beer fridge. If ya ain’t givin’er ya ain’t livin’er.

one more scope-out before moseyin’ on I’m tellin’ ya this is called Dundas Valley for a reason. More like, eight finity valleys chrissake.

To you, this is a boring picture of snow but to me it is a momentum downhill advantage that you throw yourself at. You walk down, you walk up, and on and on it goes. We would get to a peak or vista whatever the crap only to see a whole other hill to climb, hence the going mad. Still need to chart the course we took to properly brag about the Kilometers.

Walked through many pine tree clusters and bf says they were too perfectly placed therefore man-planted. I appreesh if that’s the case and you better believe yours truly got nature-splained the whole way.

Gorgeous. Spectacular. Magical. Years ago, I spent a December in Holland and went on a walk on Christmas day just over the border in Germany which resembled Canada so much. Both The Netherlands and Deutschland look like Canada. That’s all. Humble travel-brag.

The silence was also quite striking.

It was like being in a Christmas card.

We did a big hike with friends in Fergus not too long ago and they are habitual long distance hikers they would adore this and would do every single trail. They are also German, speaking of.

I uploaded a ton of pictures I am trying to be discerning. Failing.

Ooh la la that’s what I like. We dilly-dallied a little this day and so the majority of people weren’t passing us or out hiking by this time so we were pretty much alone which adds to the excitement in getting lost potential. Ain’t no one comin’ to find ya. I love disaster survival movies, most excellent.

This is all melted by now and muddy. We did a magical snowy forest night walk last year and everything had melted the next morning I took no pictures it was like a dream and never really happened the snow was so fluffy we were climbing hand over foot using head lamps. Bananas. Should probs do one of those naked and afraid reality shows.

Random blobs of snow would rain down on you or in front of you. Coolness.

Sort of dressed like a tree.

Oh look, more incline. Great.

Not dressed like a tree. I was mad at myself for wearing my neon orange Carhartt toque in case deer were around they’d see me a mile off but wait they could be colour blind and I actually don’t know anything about deer except their droppings really smell if a dog rolls through them so do not let that happen! Worse than a skunk.

Oh look more flooferness.

I wanted to be tall enough to punch that snow on the right from below to make it dust all over my bf but am not ten feet tall, unfortunately.

On second thought, ten feet wouldn’t be nearly enough and you don’t get good air from jumping off of snow you just sink further into it haha.

The picture of me in the beginning of the post was taken down this corridor.

If we brought a football would slam it right through that one.

I think you are starting to get the point.

LOL bf just walked by and sarcastically went, “WOW”. Yes I KNOW I hope this ends soon too.

It’s the Narnia escapism for me.

Then a bit of a fork this is probably about the time we started getting confused.

and again in landscape. I couldn’t even measure our course if I wanted to (and, I do!) because I don’t know where we were I kept “recognizing” things and then secretly being like, nope, I don’t think this is the place. I’ll just keep that to myself lol. I need that hike tracking app.

Went off course to another trail to hang on this little bridge by a creek.

I have never been here in the winter before with snow it is harder to catch your bearings ya ya okay you got it.

See a heart though!

A heart kite aww <3. bf said he pre-arranged it for me haha.

Ooh yay signs of life.

Picturesque. This was coming up on the Bruce trail now holy hell intersecting is happenin’.

The sun is trying to appear amidst the Siberian winter sky I’m surprised I even noticed it.

Another crazy incline going in the wrong direction and yes we did it and I lost my purple mitt on the other side of the hill so bf had to run and fetch it we could see it sitting there like an idiot just after huffing it back up the other side of this hill it was a low point for sure but hilarious so win-win.

Gotta get one of these first. That Mandarin bag is probs worth money now that buffets are closed eh jk.

So we turned around cos we could see the road and were on the Bruce trail which would have been a whole other trail from no return it was time to re-route and figure it out.

Running back with my mitt. Luckily I noticed it so quickly. You constantly take your gloves off to take a picture or grab/do whatever then walk a bit before putting them back on again and by that time your glove is long gone and you don’t know exactly when you lost it.

We were getting tireder by this point so any back-tracking was annoying and again this was a mighty incline. One of those days where you just want to go straight home but we still had an errand to do first which felt like HELL on earth.

My hero.

SO PRETTY. Definitely doing this again.

I filmed a music video here in 2009 at least I think it was here. As I said, we were hella lost. The only thing we brought was Scorchin’ Hot CHEEZ ITS! Leftover lasagna from the night before but ate that in the parking lot at the beginning.

doggie booty oh no.

WHERE TF ARE WE I AM OVER THIS

Finally some gotdamn Valley. We saw deer droppings, no deer. rip off.

Ain’t nobody sitting by this point just trying to get it done with actually I used this bench to get something out of my purse.

“His eyes looked like two piss holes in a snow bank.” That’s a bona fide PEIism for ya ahaha I told it to my bf and it’s one of his fav inspirations now needed to give it legs ah suppose.

There are some dangerous walking parts fyi.

Someone was fully in their element.

Hi Grandpa. <3 Miss you.

bf decided to Bart Simpson slide down this that’s the destruction he caused. Forever young.

Sent this to my Dad he said he always tried to put him on the right path lol.

That’s where you drive in and pay thank GOD there’s still one more long haul to go passed another parking lot though this is also a major tobogganing hill we were bummed we didn’t bring one.

Til next time xoxo your pal Raymi!

The post Lost in Dundas Valley appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

First of all, Happy New Year guys. 2020 holy shit eh! I mean, I had some resolutions but I already broke them so, there’s always 2021 to try again and I won’t be beating myself up about it or losing any (some) sleep either so let’s just move on right now. Yesterday I sent myself all the photos for this post which knocked the wind right out of me (it is SO boring) so I shifted this post to write for today instead. However, the problem with that is I am a different person today than the one yesterday who had all these thoughtful and sentimental feelings about said images. We will see what happens next, hopefully some brilliance and laughs not entirely at my expense.

(ps the plugin at the top is being fixed so ignore the Instagram block up to the left my bad!)

Went to Niagara Falls last Sunday, or, on Sunday. Hit a few wine tastings en route there (trius, peller, this place vintners?) which was hella fun. bf had tickets we had 16 glasses so like 2 flights at each place. We have packed a lot of activity in the past few weeks so bare with me here.

Please have a bathroom in the future for your wino custies. It was bad enough it was pissing rain #onstorm that we drove through to get there making the adventure seem all the more insane. Looking at wine merch when you’re blasted is super fun/ny too. I buckled at two pink glasses that say “Bubbly” in gold on them like I totally would.

Speaking of, Blow Up’s 25th Jubilee was so fun. Saw many people from the past maaaaaan, so good. The top floor was caving in and kind of thrilling being up there and also below on the first floor, it was bumping I was “concerned” lol.

This was a tame snippet feat. some of my select moves. Did you know if you go in my archives (please don’t) you can find stories about mod club from when I was 19, and blow up was the sister to that night in Toronto.

At the risk of being majorly made fun of, I give you me, dancing #mod #silverjubilee of Blow Up. pic.twitter.com/5AScipVcoZ

— RAYMI THE MINX❄ (@raymitheminx) January 2, 2020

Groovy times.

What movie does this make you think of? If you said The Irishman you are correct. Even the door is red. Scorsese on that foreshadowing a bloody killing tip son don’t think I didn’t notice I studied that mother-frigging movie and got in no less than 5 facebook fights as the world was watching it on netflix with their wrong opinions to boot. Ya I said it.

5 Stars for cuteness.

Foodie pic blindside swish! This is what I ate after all that wine I was hangry af and I was worried about getting in the pool after all that food but no worries there as the pool was too disgusting anyway, we just sat there and watched the awful view while digesting before heading up to run a bubble bawth. It was a covert opps mish smuggling our two pieces of buffet pizza which we had for breakfast ahahaha.

I incorporated my bathing suit into my outfit because, Raymi but also because this sucks me in I was doing a lot of wine and eating and thinkers gotta think yo. This is after Wine Stop 1 at the same location. It rained all day and night.

Christmas evening sorry I feel obligated to jam up this post with the requisite amount of raymi pictures I don’t even like this one!

New Year’s day, this was not enough and the amount of chicken and cheese were dismal not to be a complainer. We were, you guessed it, hungry. It’s butter chicken poutine fyi. One 2020 resolution is to eat out less and cook more. Seeing other friends on FB do the same too which is hilarious and inspiring to me because I know some of these cats are majorly addicted to going out so I am just waiting for the next restaurant picture to pop up and putting money on it secretly in my head and when it happens I will screenshot and send this part of my blog post fahaha #petty.

I asked him if he would still love me if I looked like this. He said, “it would be hard.”

The best thing about Niagara Falls is the nostalgia. It reminds me of the 80’s and being there in the 80’s and the crazy confused memories a kid conjures from that wild carny tourist traphole like the worst thing about NF is all the people amiright.

Jumping back to Christmas now. Enjoyed the fishnets and my flashy red polish, Mr. Rogers doc on in the bg. Think of someone more pure than Mr. Rogers, I’ll wait.

Oh hi Nana!

We died at this omfgggg too perfect. It is still funny.

Started doing these timer kiss portraits cos why the hell not. Maybe someday down the line will reveal the ridiculous way in which we got togeths. I am hesitant to TMI, I mean, I’ll totally TMI some things but not others. Will just have to continue watching haha.

While we are two peas in a pod in the classic sense, only one of us is a Leafs fan so the chirp-game is strong. I think he secretly likes them, deep, very, very, very deep down, somewhere. There is appreciation.

Thank you for the 1 tiny bottle of shampoo, super generous of ya but seriously the VIP parking was great and the later check-out too. bf’s golf umbrella went inside out as we were walking the falls at night in the rain didn’t matter really anyway because it was misty from all directions the umbrella was pointless. Then I lost $50 at the casino but it was my decision, Gamblor got a hold of me I needed to stare at skids, drink a beer, and throw money in the garbage. Should have cashed out at $70 but then you keep thinking you may build and build but you don’t you just crash. I love Roulette. I was watching Molly’s Game last night and she says poker is a game of skill, roulette is chance. So it means there’s a chance!!! lmfao.

Marie recommended this beauty app which is obvi not from Canada but I love it so shut up.

Yes it’s a beauty filter but it looks mostest like me I think. I am blessed with plump lips but they ain’t this plump so I have considered Kylie Jennering my lips thanks to seeing how much hotter I could look.

Yeah it’s a bit much lol. My Raybans are MIA, I put them aside on NYE and haven’t seen them since. boohoo. Update: FOUND. In a secret pocket chamber of the many pockets in my new coat.

We did a Christmas city circuit starting from my hood and it was a secret surprise to have a drink in the art deco lobby bar at Royal York which was slammed with fancies so we peaced after snooping around. It smelled like gingerbread from the actual gingerbread house they built in there.

Anyone else experiencing post-Christmas blues? This might be the Christmas blog in to February there’s still a lot of stuff to cover here.

A favoured place to pee when passing through neighbourhoods.

It was a magical Christmas, alright.

This is another great new place near me.

Went to Casa Loma on New Year’s Day, walk through Wychood and to the tunnel of glam on St. Clair. Will post that another time.

I’ve been to a wedding here, a medieval faire, and a Film fest party – all humongously epic experiences each in their own right.

Horses lived here.

Swoon.

Smiling Buddha on NYE we rocked the coat check. Fucking awesome. We were like whats up for new years, one of us needs to plan and chart out the coming week and one of us is like let me breathe we will figure it out anyway making $ versus spending money was a why not plus a duh, let’s do it I was in the throes of tweeting the job posting for them and thought fuck it why don’t we do this?

And it was a grand time. If things aren’t fun then you won’t find me there that’s my life motto.

Getting these aligned was a process but team work makes the dream work.

When you are a walking instagram what do you expect. The best was he was so oblivious to me but everyone else was zeroing in so I had to deke them out then go for the kill, piss off lcbo’ers mind ya business.

Lovely drives thru country snow, very good balance to my city life. Sometimes the concrete jungle is legit so claustrophobic don’t get me wrong I have loved every neighbourhood (save for one) that I’ve lived in in the city – if we made a map/tshirt out of it, it would be so very populated like people who thumbtack world maps for all their trips and travels mine is like that except Toronto neighbourhoods (plus LA Maine Brooklyn UK Holland Aruba Miami Vancouver blabbity blah…), like many people too I am sure. In short, if you sublet and you hate it, you just leave it. Boom.

We re-watched both The Hangover movies because it makes us laugh our brains out. The little things yeah.

See the falls over yonder.

We combed the Fallsview casino mall because it was cold af there outside by the falls and maybe I was cranky, I have seen this before are shitty things you say haha actually I was about to have meltdown number 1 okay hear me out, we were walking uphill in a wind tunnel and I said okay this isn’t fun anymore right before he could say anything my hat blew away right off my head up in the air in a big arc and backwards down the hill behind me into a group of people getting off a bus I had to haul ass down to get it before it got another gust of wind beneath it and a little kid jumped to it just before I did, nice kid, everyone had heard the bang of the brim of my hat hitting the sidewalk so I heard a cluster of Spanish tourists gasp it is funny as hell in hindsight but he knew I was about to full blown lose it so he grabbed me by the hand and dragged me up the hill in a sweet way but yeah, I was losing it.

We had our own lookout observation area it was very relaxing plus 80’s tunes were playing it’s always mesmerizing staring at the falls.

Girrrrrrrrrrrrl.

Okay I’s gots to bounce it’s been a slice have things to do so bon weekend see you soon happy 2020 xoxo your pal Raymi.

The post Blogging in 2020 vision appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

…and like myself again. It feels good to be back but where that is, who knows who cares I have done a lot of pretentious self-reflection self love self care weird fucking things this summer I dunno. I isolated myself. I took’er easy. Any way I will be working my way backward through my phone of the things that are still there on it that I did this summer and the thoughts that I had while doing them and that will be that. In the blink of an eye the season t’was over but it’s not officially done until sept 21 So. There.

Oh my god if you saw the set-up I am dealing with right now to get wifi into my own apartment you would die I am trying so hard not to be a bitch and just roll with it but add loud hammering into the fold louder because my door is wide open to get the signal using a stool as a table and my shoe rack as a mouse pad rest even moving it a fraction to the left cuts it off so where I thought I was on easy street before on my micro-kitchen counter…I download netflix movies from my account so that I can binge them in bed by nightfall I am too annoyed and embarrassed to show a picture here I sent one to Marie and she was like girlllll get Rogers I didn’t want to get into it here! but maybe the secret to maintaining an audience (like women in China livestreaming do) is to complain and share every fucking mundane thing that I roll my eyes at other people sharing on Facebook and yet… read every goddamn bit of it myself.

I have been back in the city a couple weeks now? Going on week 3? I spent a month abouts in Burlington, from Wasaga, to Oakville and all I had packed were bathingsuits and one pair of shorts that I wore all summer LMFAO… anyway we will get back to that. But anyway since I have been home in Toronto NO WIFI. The Super was my wifi hookup and he moved out. I refuse to spend one more fucking dime on anything period in this city if I can help it especially since there is pre-existing wifi in our building already this whole time unbeknownst to me, and a strong signal at that if you can bloody reach it, or speed, at least when my door is open and I am perched over my laptop like an arachnid from District 9 (look it up) my fucking back is killing me bruh.

Now I can bundle my phone package with internet right? Wrong. But then the guy at rogers is like wait I can get you a good deal. Brother man fuck you. Don’t act all back door special with me I have had my account since I was 19, I am 36, do the math I am paying you way too fucking much already. Even if I bit the bullet we still need to figure out where the fuck to install it in this old-ass building. Why the hell would I even go get my own modem when it’s already here and we just need an extender on the existing modem down the fucking hall from me I can see right now I am legit on my last nerve — fix this yesterday. Was told will just go by the computer store on College 2 weeks ago and it hasn’t happened I am beyond pissed. I am also SICK of having my door OPEN – it isn’t safe. Maintenance dudes keep looking in AT me too as a bonus while I am typing here on a stool. I will probably delete this but I needed to explode. I am annoying them they are annoying me. They can hear my same twenty songs I play over and over.

Other than that I am doing great and very happy ahhaha sorry! Not lying.

I am glad with the things in my life that I do which make me happier at a later point in time when I look at my photos and in the moment I have this obsessive compulsion to capture and hoard experiences and then self-reflect maybe share a fraction of my adventures later on I have been doing this for the majority of my life it is my truth and it’s how I sought to attract my tribe, anyone, who would listen to and see me.

I see poets as roving packs of magic creatures, demented, lovingly so besought by their wariness and experience I eat it up. I fill my head up with so much fantasy to self-preserve and contain my way, in which I need to constantly justify my nature? Truth be told I am comfortable in who I am, arrogant, and also afraid. It is an adrenaline at your backside. Think twenty minutes of anxiety every twenty minutes and that is how I live.

you have to make amends with everything before you can suffer nothing before you can be everything you ever wanted to be.

We’re always thinking of little schemes and ideas for me to hone my talents which are so fucking good like a how to online date thing where I tell newbs what to watch out for because let me tell ya I have been a bible of wisdom for my squad in their new time of swipings prime of recent.

I just have this life I dreamt of before when i was so enamoured by hipsterism kooky aesthetic and am now trapped by it because living in Toronto is so expensive when I leave this place they will slap paint on and charge $2000 for it so I am like fighting the man and the power and everyone always anywhere anytime.

I need my mister dress-up lifestyle I look to other institution peoples like myself in Toronto, how they are fairing, and some have all become lampoons of themselves by design, by necessity, and by need to survive. We all have had our own successes, failures, fall-backs. BUT most importantly COMEBACKS and I am here for it! I so support my fellow Toronto celebs my music industry pals who helped MAKE ME. ILU 4EVR #Gratitude #blessed.

NOW on to my next annoying topic to rant about which is purely self-inflicted toxicity of my own actions embedded deep within a place of my disgusting vanity and vulgur as it is I find it hard to justify looking pale in the winter time I am only angry at myself for not freezing my account for two months of the summer such waste throwing money in the garbage and tanning salons are crooks in the bests of times you have to show up and do paperwork like a gym like uhhm no one has time to even consider the sheer terror of that.

Perhaps you find what I find in this blog style vein of an art-form to be antiquated, outlandish out of style but it is normal to me. I never knew but of anything else and to even fucking second guess it is a travesty.

How greedy with your time are you? Because I am so far gone indulgent with mine I was JOMO before that ever existed like putting your state of being in a physical valium existence this is what Netflix does to us today it’s just too good too easy to watch through a cinematic lens parallel to our facebook landscape connections to those we knew years ago.

And getting back to basics of doing irl things is utterly amazing. As an adventure thrill-seeker you fill the chambers of the void with constant doing the older you get because you finally know and fear and realize how limited time truly is.

Nothing makes me feel more emotional, more poetic, more depressed, than autumn. If it were a person I would punch it in the face, buy it drinks, and ghost it. Because you know what comes next. Sacrifices are fun and all unless you’re the cat on the pyre. Winter is LONG. I think the majority of my blog posts are about how much I fucking hate winter. Wow.

I’ll just take a sec to switch gears here and breathe.. LOL.

Nothing bothers me but everything makes me insane.

Relate?

I come up with these lines all day long I wish I would just write them down make a set out of them. This is the start. This is a preclude to a podcast.

the things that you admire, inspire, and you let shine out through and you remember that moment again and what it reminded you of so sweetly, to begin with.

If you want to go somewhere from 1909 go to Allan Gardens. Bring a b cup, a marie antoinette glass (coup glass) cos she had b cup sized tits ha ha I love that!

Took in two softball games ate shawarmas it was lovely.

It got cold though. Made do.

All in all a great summer it has been. I went all over and was a beach bum as much as poss.

SO here is the story of my Christmas blanket. Since nobody asked. Two Christmas parties ago I was a marketer for an agency and I lost my receipt for all the Christmas crap I bought for the Christmas staff party and they were like Raymi we can’t reimburse you for that so I was like fine THIS BLANKET IS MINE NOW plus all these elves. lmao.

I left behind lots of shit there is no love lost I just think it’s funny. I bought it for this couch we had in the office Tess suggested I cover it up with something as a last ditch effort Dollarama came through. Those girls loved me Valentines day Easter St Patricks Christmas Canada day Halloween those were good times sigh. I’d go to Dollarama her beside my place before work and pick out fun ass things to put together on display for instagram and clients and candy for the team for morale.

See that bee.

They were everywhere.

I went to pee and came back with crayons and we had a colouring contest had a girl impartially judge who was better and we won against my boy Troy sorrryyyyyyyyy we only had three colours to work with.

Love this beach, bish.

We found a discarded bubble disc I have no other way of knowing how to describe it but anyway it was essentially a frisbee so we tossed it back and forth until it broke for a good 20 minutes I stood on top of the rock formation because it was the last place the sun was hitting and it was such a perfect game of frizz I felt like an Olympian all these moments I shotgun to my heart to get me through winter my least spirit animal.

So happy to live so close to here.

and to here.

So centrally located to many places it’s why I live where I live and I take it because it’s a gem and when I lived in the beaches I felt the same melancholy temporariness that it was living anywhere in Toronto but I am grateful for what I have right now so that’s that! It’s fucking cool it’s unique it speaks to my eccentricities my lone wolfism fuck yeah no roommates.

Oh lord I uploaded way too many photos than actually wanted to deal with so lets to be continued this never-ending story for now thanks guys see ya.

The post I feel as though I’m coming out of a fog appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

Hey y’all hope you’re a superfan or can stomach a fuck ton of selfies. Both!

This is my David Bowie look. I posted a selfie years ago and an internet buddy responded in kind with a picture of David Bowie doing a dramatic looking off into the distance pose so every time since it comes to mind. Creative collaborators should always be looking over the fence at what the other guy is doing and taking some of that magic back with them.

I bought a new outfit and then we didn’t even go out. We made it downstairs to the bar then the mood passed. Whatever. No hangovers this weekend for it. I really like the green bomber coat I bought too, you’ll have to wait to see that didn’t take any pics of the whole ensemble.

I wish I got the skirt in a smaller size. Oh well. I got the small, I figured an xs would be ostentatious.

Feeling the black and white look.

Brown boots and black do not go I know the rule. I smash it but also I had these black heeled booties beneath my desk at work for a month, suede? I haven’t sprayed them I’m protective of them so they only made it down the road. I’m glad people didn’t dance all over them for sure they’d be toasted.

Someone bought a scale so now I know my number. I am pretty chill about my body these days as in I am fine with being juicy which is a nice and sassy way of saying I am kind of a sexy blob. Curves and all that are acceptably hot now thanks KardASSians. No really. Thank you. But I do miss my bike body and the endorphin rush that it brings and money saving cycle psycho insanity I receive. Last season I didn’t start riding my bike to work until mid-July so only got about that in shape which was pretty good but this season I’m taking my bike out way earlier than that. Let’s meet back here in September and see how much of a turbo-babe I am cool thanks.

It’s a bit big I am hoping once I start wearing it and shrink it mayhaps the sideboob will mellow yellow out. It fits fine as fuck everywhere else tho baleeee that. I got another cute one-piece to round out my collection. The Michael Kors (navy blue) one I got I don’t want it to get destroyed from over-usage and chlorine, kk.

Sometimes life is ruff.

I really like the rainbow filter. I come by the selfie honestly as I kind of started it. Facts. Anyway, filters did not exist back then and just cos I am egocentric doesn’t mean every selfie posted over the years has been stellar so now it’s a new toy to play with. Just cos women age doesn’t mean they age ugly or look ugly every day as an “aged” person. I have been told so many times what am I gonna do when I’m ugly, or lose my looks (I have one colleague/friend who has NO FILTER WHATSOFUCKINGEVER) and I’m like, “will still take selfies”. I picture myself like a quirky Yoko Ono Tori Amos weirdo sort, it’s not just about the beauty, the aged beauty but about the moment and feeling evoked therein, the outfit, the fashion… and as ugly as I may (soon to be/am now) there’s always plenty way more ugly than me. AND. Filters. As previously mentioned.

With the right attitude you really can wear whatever you want. Don’t worry. I get roasted on occasion when necessary. Luckily I am a caricature of a human, “a brand” if you will and I live in Toronto where anyone still playing this late in the game wrought with Peter Pan syndrome really can drag it out as long as they fucking want. Long story short, rock jeans like a ball gown and a ball gown like jeans and you can get away with it. Like the time I wore a bathing suit and daisy dukes at the casino. We went to check on the car where it was parked in the beaches, got in, and just drove. Won a lot of money too. Life is wild…

…basically this is to say that I slept over and all I had was the work shirt from the day before so I needed a shirt to wear lol. It was cold this day and rainy I didn’t have a cardigan or hoodie but I had the Christmas blanket hoarded at my desk which I wore like a wizard cape for a bit. It looked Raymazing.

Had a great time in a fabulous home in Oakchill last weekend with my mom. Thanks Tray! Love you love you love youuuu!

I tweeted everything while there. Marie goes, is that a bowl of diamonds? Yes. It is exactly that.

Julie said this was like looking into my future, this pic of mom and I. Well good. I’ll be a lucky woman if I get to age like me ma’am.

Next time I will make more effort in the clothing I pack. I can make it work but it’s always this thrown together garbage that if I wasn’t so fucking cool would be like who is this idiot? I am glad I bought that pink toque, it stops people in the street and they talk to me. One guy was like PINNNNNNNNNNNNNNK and I just went, “yes” then everyone around us laughed. Shit like that. There are comedians all around us. Embrace them.

Oakville is a special place to me. 1. I was born there. 2. I have hung out everywhere, know so much town gossip and history generations over it’s a nostalgic punch in the face everywhere I go. Like for instance, this used to be the Bearded Collie and when I was little I was practicing my dance moves in here with Sarah and I knocked a waitress’ tray as she went by me. It was a disaster. Then years later it was our watering hole for awhile and many, many, many other embarrassing things happened here okay not many just one that I am too embarrassed to recount for you now for some reason but trust me it was LEGENDARY. The worst. HAHAHAHAa.

swoon.

A very magical place.

It was cold af.

The champers was flowing.

Gosh this super post just keeps going.

The service was slow, they were slammed so I get it. My order was messed up too. I was chill but enjoyed my table mates complaints about it all. When she walked away after taking our complex order I said wow there is no way she going to remember that? After 3 things my brain shuts off and I have to write it all down.

I said no hash browns. I got em anyway. They are so delicious I had to eat them. We saved some for the birds. I got cold slices of tomatoes later on which I didn’t eat. I said don’t you grill these? She said no as if I was insane. Yes. Because grilled tomatoes as substitute would be impossible…if you only…had…a grill back there.

It’s so easy to fatten up on weekends. Too easy.

Fed the shit hawks and ducks.

Mom wore my cat hat. Also by the way if you need your house painted, let us know.

Whoops.

When I christened myself as Raymi I knew then what I know now that it is the BEST CUTEST NAME IN EXISTENCE AND EVERYTHING SHOULD BE CALLED RAYMI.

My mom has mad fashion style.

Gotta have my pinks

Mom said we look snapped here. Snapped. Nice slang mom.

I didn’t have a bawth here. Should I have?

Corporate whimsy look.

Someone tried to say these cat filters are ugly. Um. This same person is full of shit. Cats are adorable. Illogic really irks me.

Proving a point.

David Bowie emo look. Yes I do work at work this is at the end of the day lol.

Water baby forever.

It’s the bandeau, relax.

Well, thanks for stopping by! Have an excellent Sunday.

The post issa Raymbo vibe appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

Adding the title of this blog post to the resume of my life as I have dedicated much of it to exactly that and I am still standing bruh. Now here’s some things from said life. Hold on tight y’allready made it through the cold open. Don’t get me started on comedy. Every sentence that comes out of my mouth is either a punchline or preamble to something (I find) hilarious. I am getting better. The key is to remember your material.

Mom stayed with us for a week and we all survived. Hey man I ain’t saying I am innocent either just saying is all. This is from Canada Day. We went to Woodbine beach after for the free concert and shenanigans in the beer garden with our roommate plus mom oh it was a time. Living in the beaches is ridonkulous. I will look back on this summer and cry whistfully into the wind. As much as I dig moving forward if I look back at all the amazing shit I have done in my life too much stacked together without enjoying those moments. When I look at skyporn cloud pictures from kew beach over winter I will explode. I will just explode.

Sushi/sashimi the other night. They forgot a roll we were like yes we want it. We ordered pizza later on at night cos we were still fung lol.

Canada Day. What’s in the baaaaag man.

Did your head explode? Good. This is Fella. We are bonding now. The little fart has my heart.

Taking him to the vet was a trip. A sweaty, eating my hair while my shorts were falling down and walking in the wrong direction of where the vet is -trip.

My face has been breaking out because I am aging backward in time. You have to have popeye’s at least once in your lifetime right. With gravy and biscuits, dirty rice and macaroni ahh gad the shame the delicious shame.

Starting the ol diet off with a bang. No more deep fried foods diet lol.

We walk as much as I try and force us to. We are living in paradise FOMO BRO. Thank God we don’t Pokemon Go. Not to be a hater but we have enough things in our life.

This guy had this house built on kew gardens property for his homegirl when they got married to keep her close and happy. Lucky chick. I read the plaque while drunken lawnbowler preps sauntered by me, rejected from the steamwhistle short bus (it was full). Could tell they were embarrassed because it happened right in front of me. One calls out, “claaaaassic” both in ivy league sweaters tied around their shoulders. I fucking love the beach for reasons exactly like this. So I sped up to walk ahead and let them bro it out alone up to Queen and a patio to continue getting blasticated but then they caught up to me reading this plaque. I must have read that plaque 4 times before I was able to retain any of the information written on it. Then another prep threesome walked by I could feel their eyes all over me. So much awkward loud silence like, I should have been HEY LEMME READ THIS TO Y’ALL AS YOU WALK UP THE STREET NOW. My problem is I size people up too quickly and then, I hate them. I had seen the gf ignoring the bf while on her phone and snapchatting her drunken mother riding around in circles on their bicycle. The bf had seen me note ALL of this. So in my head we had this, again, awkward knowing secret together. I bumped into them one more time as they headed into a bar when I noticed they were all wearing identical khaki pants and white buttoned shirts. Themewear for the lawn bowling club’s rager. Aren’t you glad I share things?

I really do love it here. It’s calm. Fabulously. I read alone on the beach. Not for long. I am too hyper and ADD but the whole process of packing a backpack, hitting some shops then reading til it’s dark while I get eaten to death by mosquitos forces me to slow down. It clears my head. I get lonely but I like it. To a point.

Julian Bachlow has been getting a lot of acting gigs lately it’s impressive. Some days are long shoots so we don’t see each other as much. Gives me time to reflect and to miss him.

Love this little nook we happened upon one day. It changes too. New things appear or leave.

Very The Friendly Giant.

Went to Fat Bastard burrito Saturday night. Everywhere we go it’s like performance art lol.

I know why it’s called fat bastard burrito though. Get a small. It’s gigantic. I ate it again on Sunday.

I had the butter chicken. Phenom. With noodles. It blew my mind.

Before we hit the road selfie.

Feeling this Beck jam big rn btw.

What should we call our variety show?

We watched Fast Times at Ridgemont High the other night. It is still amazebaaaalls. Sorry to bring amazeballs back. It’s crazy the cameos in it.

Super beached out af like it’s raining desperate.

My nails are naked rn about to paint them after this post or keep them natch. We will see.

What happened in Nice today…I feel like a dick writing this post. I began this post earlier then we went out in our “super ultra safe neighbourhood” and came home to the news. I kept running out to the porch to tell everyone because I am a disaster junky like that but also I have been desperate to write a blog post for days and keep getting sidetracked and this is like putting my foot down I AM DOING THIS and I am writing this fuck sake. It just feels like it’s raining bad shit all around us so I like to appreciate what I have and those I love. Cut the shit and get on with it.

I made him this bacon bagel sandwich with lettuce from the garden and tomato. It was out of control excellent.

Little pug pug made it to the big times. Everyone died when they saw him at the vet now I know why dog people like being dog people because they get to feel like the popular girl ALL the time it was like Jesus ENOUGH jk we love it I have stories of dog beach adventures man let me tell you life is good sometimes.

Have to get into my fancier gear once in awhile to remember that I still do that sometimes.

Someone is babysitting him for a few days this picture just tore my heart to shreds.

If this bridge could talk. Took Julian on a tour of my old hood. It feels like you know my life because everything that has ever happened to me in this park comes flooding back.. but how could you know. Anyway it was a trip. It was like I was just there yesterday. We off-roaded it into the jungle and my legs are all scratched up for it. Julian loved it… mom not so much. It has overgrown a lot in a decade and then some haha.

It was a tour of Lauren. I brought them to a cemetery in Streetsville. A friend of mine is buried here. We made friends with this cat who fell in love with us and followed us out of the cemetery and then my heart broke some more. I had a doctor’s appt in ‘sauga is why we were all there togeths.

I can’t wait to find my belt.

I can tell you a lot of stories about the Credit River. Involving me and/or others, the police, bush parties, fires, river walking, setting shit on fire, sneaking out at night. Forest sex. Crazy bananas things. What is this our Texas? Well, for a time maybe so, maybe so.

Falconer Drive is totes diffskies now. Shit of legend. Curfews at night lol.

Kay back to Toronto now. La la land. I see things you would not believe there is even a beaches mascot now, a dog, a guy in a dog mascot costume. Brilliant.

And this!

Losing steam here now people. Yeah it’s snack time.

All about dat neon tho.

I made a new friend one afternoon. We laughed and shared the best stories, totally vibed and took each other on a social adventure I could feel Don’s happiness as he told me about his grandmother, who championed him when he smiled on the inside and outside as he spoke. He blew my mind with some real talk perhaps too controversial for my blog but when he left he said he really enjoyed talking to me. I wished Julian was there to meet him.

Hahah what’s with all the emo pictures I will try to switch it up guys swear.

Your life is a piece of work and yes it’s work but it’s a piece of artwork so design it how you like share it how you want tell it how you feel make it magic make it real.

If you venture into this dog park you can pretend you are on another planet if you wanted to a little Jurrasic park here and The Martian there, nah bruh?

I watched the storm roll in wondering if it was a storm. Rolling in. Baha. Then I ran home in the lightning scared out of my mind. Lightning storms um nope. All the rain storms lately are cool it’s SO HOT the planet is like “time to explode into rain mawfuck burst inna rain son!”

I look like a bohemian slob most days so the one or two days I make effort I do the selfie thing so these are my faux apologies.

Sleeping on our new mattress on the floor has been FUN/NY. Okay I will tell ONE embarrassing story. Not really embarrassing at all but like, we were drunkies after sushi and needed more food so ordered pizza but we were rolling around on this frigging thing and like basically already on the floor..and drunk with the giggles. We laugh at our bullshit a lot at least. Wow cool story, nice and short.

Beginning of the mural. Maybe I will tackle it tomorrow.

Doing starry night has made me keen on researching Van Gogh. Quite the guy.

Oh look. MORE pictures of me. LOL.

Tash and I hit up Brass Vixens last week as well. Going for another class real soon. Love it.

Went to the Drive-in. A summer bucket list must! okay guys time to irl so ttyl xo rlw!

Ps. enjoy our soulful rap hook btw!

The post elaborate stupid things appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

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Here is my promo video. You may have to view it 5 times or so to catch it all. It’s the clip before the Q&A plus something I will house on raymitheminx.com forevermore! I’ll brb with a blog post here today so come back. Baby don’t gooooooooo!

The post RAYMI THE MINX Q&A PROMO appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

The post Konqistador Raymi the Minx Glitch Art Collab appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

Please ignore my blog titles. Sometimes I think I’m being dark and witty then I save these sayings that come to me and by the time I get around to blog-using one it’s like, cool relevant?

I love to be obtuse. When I’m not busy being acute, that is.

Whatever. I’m funnier than you are.

I try not to get lost too much in the stupid things I profess. This post is only supposed to be about the handful of selfies I uploaded and nothing more today, but now I AM lost in explaining the method to the radness which an artist should never do, except I always do – can’t stop now.

Winter is very much feeling like a jail sentence. I have been watching a lot of this show called Banshee, do you know it? It’s that show where the sheriff is a guy who just blew into town out of jail, conning the town and it involves sexy Amish people (there’s this one chick you just gotta see, oh man) and more interesting back story going on in the show. A lot of nudity and violence.

I’ve also completed watching the first season of The Affair. So juicy that one, gets a bit dark and draggy but you’re sucked into the story and characters. It makes you think about relationships a lot, cheating, passion. What’s more important, your lust or keeping family together. I think an age-old conundrum and people get agitated about this subject because nobody wants to know if they’re being cheated on.

Went for a very needed tan with mom. Time to get that body ready.

Definitely have to do some cardio today. Boylord is getting together with Dave Love our drummer today! Something came up.

How I look w/o instagram filters not bad for an old lady

That bloaty paunch is gone now too. Well, reduced.

So yeah I guess I switched boyfriend teams… the other one has already been married before (twice) and not interested in doing it again and seeing as I am of a delicate age right now it’s time to sail on down the river hahaha. I am bummed I liked him. We had great sexual chemistry. Sayonara!

I’m not making a relationship the focal point of my life right now anyway, some changes are (a change is gonna come!) about to occur to keep me occupied and build my brand/career some more/there’s always more peen down the road. BUT, juicy gossip bomb, as it turns out you might recognize some of the surroundings I’ve been posting my selfie settings in.

Watching the affair, having one…

I will admit the vindication feeling is superb when someone breaks your heart, realizes they lost someone incred then fights to get you back for months and months and months. Now that I am back from the dead it’s different now humongously.

There is a distance now that must be earned back. I’m getting over the other guy. I feel sick all the time and have no appetite. I never tell this shit to you guys but whatever. I bleed like you do too I am not any better.

I will have to continue this conversation later though because we have a viewing this afternoon and I have some errands to do and hair dye to buy.

Yesterday my tits were famous a little bit. They got more fav’s and retweets than this by the time the russsssssh ended lol. I love bragging about my one secret famous friend who gives me advice every time I am about to do something stupid (and slutty) and he always says to go for it. So I went for it and #freethenipple rewarded me.

I cannot handle booze anymore. This was yesterday. See how I need to dye my hair real bad. Gonna get this superhero kinda red.

Face obsession done, fungrily yours,

RLW.

The post you dont like it it dont like you appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

And I also love Sia too, so much so that I made a weirdo platinum blond hair video to Sia before Sia did, maybe she even copied me who knows God I miss those shorts left them in a cab on Pride a couple years ago haha giver!

beat and the pulse from raymi lauren on Vimeo.

I also liked her back when I looked like this.

And that.

Okay happy TBT I think these are all the Sia videos I have. More crazy news coming soon always.

The post Just tryna be a heartthrob here appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

Hey guys, didja take yer joke pills today hopefully jesus -uck am I ever in a crabby mood. PMessy nahmean. And I super want a drink. I am at the point like why am I doing this. This sucks. Is boring. And so on. Plus Christmas is basically here which means Drinkmas.

It’s Day 13 of no drinking and I want a dark and stormy right fckn meow.

But then I looked in the mirror and was like hubba hubba. Just jay-kaying guys. How will I ever become friends with Gwyneth Paltrow if I drink. Bet she never lets her hair down or allows herself to be out of control like ever. Stringent chicks are so fascinating. Speaking of typecast people, Gwyn is one of those skinny broads in loose-fitting black lingerie proudly on gawky display in several of her flicks and you can only do that when you’re a beanbole and to be a beanpole you have to be majorly uptight. We have to make do with the bodies God gave us and if you’re flat then to pass as sexy you have to be coatrack thin. Or that’s what the sickness beauty perception states.

Smiling makes you look younger too. Fortunately more than half my bloggy life was devoted to neve smiling so I don’t have massive crow’s feet and laugh lines. All my lines are on my orehead from fucking around with my eyebrows and applying mascara EVERY DAY I am 100% going to get botox one day and have a forehead like a balloon.

I had a gap in my teeth as a kid and then one day it just closed, maybe when I was about twenty, but because of the gap when I smiled (when I was forced to) I never smiled with my teeth showing I hated my Madonna gap. Now I know the power of my teeth and flashing ‘em but you have to be careful and not overdo it because you can look like a game show host which I have on many occassions. Smiling smiling smiling, inside dying.

If I wrote a book like how I write these blog posts I’d have no recollection of what my book was about because I have absolutely no attention span and whatever I cared about last week is like ancient history in internet time.

Made this.

Sorry if you’re grossed out. Or tempted.

Reminds me of Fubar 2.

So glam.

Yep I still dress like Peter Pan.

This was yesterday. God I miss running. it’s just too cold and too much hassle.

Pumped about getting so much laundry done yesterday.

Still eating candy like crazy I think is turning us into monsters.

Keeping food as interesting as poss.

I have every intention to run again soon though, this headwrap is part of the plan. Today woulda been good too it’s kinda mild.

That’s enough for now. Have a great one.

The post Muse of the stars. appeared first on Raymi the Minx.