Oh hi there just calling to say hi. I am not a phone person, I am a text person. I do not enjoy speaking on the phone. I see it as a waste of my time. Once in awhile I love a good chat but mostly I like to just sit in silence alone all day long hunched over my laptop. Sir Hunch-a-lot. So, if I do call you it’s because I think I am in trouble or I am fighting with you and have too many things to type about how much you have offended/annoyed me. I disperse my gossip evenly throughout my top five texters but sometimes it’s good to just have radio silence and cut your secrets in half, like maybe I shouldn’t say that one part, yeah, I’ll sleep better.

See how he just gets dumped down like that, you gotta be quicker bro. Some randoms were like are you going to crowd surf? Uh, no. One doesn’t leave the house thinking am I going to crowd surf tonight? baha I’d love to be the kind of person though where that would be a possibility. I am not going to have kids until I fucking crowdsurf goddammit. Summer bucket list. I crowd surfed at Metallica when I was 15 and it took me practically the entire show to get the balls to do it. But then I did it twice. And then I learned what happens to chicks who crowdsurf. Disgusting gropetastical city. Then I was young and naive so I didn’t enjoy it but now that I am a pervy don’t give a shit I think it would be kind of hot provided I was loaded enough to just go with the flow bro. I had hair extensions in at wakestock and didn’t want that to be fussed with so I didn’t do it there either but we had enough horny mobscenes of jocks surrounding us, we had our fill. In the video of Lady Gaga crowd-surfing no one seems to be feeling her up out of celebrity respect despite her wearing a mesh body suit only.

Also have you seen this?

I love her makeup tutorials. Moving on.

Where am I?

The tale of 2 broke girls continues.

But we must start from the beginning. I was almost going to bail because after the taping of creeps on Wednesday night, your hero let’er rip on the town so I was not feeling so hot yesterday but I caught a second wind, got my act together and went out. Jules needed my +1 so I couldn’t pull a bail stunt. Aunt Raymi saves the day. Again.

They have their own little thing. My Friend™ does this for attention and she places herself in high traffic areas so that you cannot avoid her. She is ridinkulous and being a little more clingy lately now that Lady Garbage is gone. They cremated her. She is gone gone gone like I am picturing her in a box buried in the ground under a nice tree someplace then keep reminding myself that nope, not possible. I didn’t think to ask what they did to her and I wish I didn’t know because it makes me more sad. I think morbid heartbreaking thoughts as hard as possible to make myself sad so that I can feel feelings because I think it is healthy. Healthier than being a soulless bitch and just being oh whatever it’s a dumb cat bye bye, you know what I’m saying? I loved her. I gave her her own name, she had a few others but you all know her as Lady Garbage. Okay I just made myself cry next topic please.

Jules and her lollipops why must my 20 year old friend always constantly remind us about that? She’s going to be 21 soon and then she’s going to SF AND she’s going away for a month before that so naturally Bechnique and I are pretty gutted about that OMG crying again what a loser I need a f-ing nap haha.

I waved to her at one point when I was dancing on the vip booth and she was like, what? Lolhfkjdsfkjs that was hysterical to me.

Hilarious. It doesn’t look like that when you’re there and the lights are going all dance club bananas when the flash cancels that out and you get a photo like this the cloak of darkness protection vanishes and it’s just two funny dogs and people standing around. I love crowd scene photos, so many little stories going on and funny faces, stupid dance moves frozen in time.

This picture is funny to me we are all equally rtrd’d.

This one needs to be bigger because you need to take it all in.

I need hairapy. People be diggin’ ma ponytails. Not one other girl in ponytails out last night. Wonder when the trend will blow up. Maybe also cos I wore ponytails on creeps, we shall see.

See? I am stoked that there are TWO episodes of creeps. The finale is July 11 and the reunion episode is July 17 which I’ll miss cos I’m in Aruba so tape it for me and put it on tha internet. I got to have my retribution on the reunion episode so I must see it!!

Hours spent killing time between tapings on water and vegetables made the cast really bond, a happy and most welcome surprise. I’ll post the rest of my pics next post promise.

Makin’ fans and friends urrywhere I go.

Can you tell I had an all nighter (practically) the night before? Not really!

Seen here, guy in the tie is Bobby and he featured me in one of his columns in Elle magazine and it will be in the August issue he says. I gave him some manswers for dating advice or some such. Behind Lauren is Zach Bussey, more pics of him in a sec. He said we have met before but I have no recollection of that because I was probably tanked at the time and he looks like a nondescript average dude no offense. I meet tons of the same people over and over again at these twitter things and I still can’t remember a lot of their names but I know their faces and too much time and parties have gone by for me to go hey dude I’ve partied with ten thousand times what the fuck is your name again?

I remember when I had your hair Meg and then I messed it all up. I like you Meg, you’re sweet.

Zach this is a great angle for you.

Mr. Edgar what is up.

Uh great.

I fist pumped a lot last night and made it rain money. Yes it’s stupid but you can’t help it your arms just get in the air and before you know it you’re the epitome of, of, a total tool idiot. But it’s so fun espesh from the VIP area dancing and being watched and smiled at. That was so Kardashian of me. I can see a few people busting me taking this pic heh.

I like your shirt booboo.

Bobby and Meg, what’s that all aboot eh? Do tell. I’d watch! Okay mommy’s tired see you on the couch. Have a killer weekend! I’m dancing in the Pride parade on Sunday/Canada day I can fit one more girl if you’re interested.

Disgustingly yours, Raymapaloser.

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Hiya player haters how’s your lunch? This is me and Brian at the nxne party last night, it was a killer time I talked my face off and told all the right lies to the right people it was such a peach. Snoop Dogg did not make it out unfortch ha.

Who are these people? Who cares!

I walked all the way to the hyatt to get my badge in my wedges then to peter pan then to the hoxton, all in wedges, all in walking. It was a pretty fucking stupid idea if you ask me. Then I ended the night trying to double on Rebecca’s bike which was impossible so I ran along side her (and ahead) home, in wedges. Suffice it to say my right knee feels like it had surgery on it. Great!

Mr. Hollett is a fan of RTM.COM what what! Even knew who stupid (Rebecca) was! We talked about all kinds of shit. Better party pics to come later once I kiss enough event photog ass to get the good ones.

Picking up my badge, tough crowd, tough crowd. Just kidding the panels are down another way. Bumped into Meg Button and a guy and I was like did you learn anything today? SYNERGY ENGAGE ENGAGE baha. Meg’s hair is always stunning. I can’t wait to have long thick full hair again. People might kill themselves from jealousy.

Everyone made fun of me (jealous) for my “Oooooh” MEDIA pass. That’s right assholes bow before me I am the news now. Always was. Always will be. This just in I am going to the bathroom meet you in the lobby!

Rebecca went out in her pajamas last night and this smooth talker got her in to the party (and Jules) Jules was like we knew you would get us in blabbity blah I say the right things and it’s true. No those aren’t pajamas but she kept saying they (it?) were (was). I am drinking a gin fizz and I adore Peter Pan, why I never go there I don’t know. The inside is so charming. Drinks could be a bit cheaper though.

Jerk chicken caesar (with no croutons).

Let them eat soup!

On the phone with little Lois!

I wore bathing suit underwear. I did not flash any photographers cos I didn’t adequately girlscape before heading out. I have french hair shorts baha. SHH!

We annexed this corner and I hoarded it then made sure when I left it that other people would continue to hoard it in the event I might return (I didn’t!) it was a super fun time not a zoo like the opening night parties usually (always) are. Sometimes they’re nucking futs right!

Okay well that’s all the pics I have now we wait for the rest but in the mean time here’s some crap I ran out of time to blog yesterday. I would phone it in if I could I really would haha.

This belonged to Britt.

Heard you haven’t been working out as much lately. We should do something about that.

Where is my goddamn lighter bro! I can’t find it!

If you can’t be smart you can be adorkable. Speaking of, the other day I said facetiously on twitter, Blogging: no skills necessary. When clearly there are loads of skills necessary. True I am a shitty lazy blogger but still I am a GREAT blogger so that’s all I meant sorry for the epic confusion. Sometimes my humour goes over people’s heads and they think I’m being broad when I’m not. I’m talking about myself guys what you do on your own blogs is all you. Except from the parts that are ripped off from me lol.

Yeah guy. Zzzz. Feels like Friday so much. Back to work!

The post mover shaker faker appeared first on Raymi the Minx.

Colleague and I took 800 shots last night. Widdled down to 150, he said 50 tells the story. HA ha yeah right you wish start your own blog then OH wait, I just looked through 4 more pages worth o_0. Lets trip down through the vortex shall we then? Ps. Do you know that song lyric (post title) by modest mouse’s Tiny Cities Made of ashes song?

I’m going to play it right meow! You should too.

I dressed like a spanish ballroom dancing fly girl. It’s going to catch on, watch for it.

Now here is why this going to be a 4 part post if I’m not too selective.

I spy Ally on the red carpet, the beginning of 30000 familiar faces. What an amazing party list! I throw my head over one shoulder, BAM fifty faces I recognize. I kept pinching myself about it only being Monday night.

Flipbook. Adorable.

I’ll post a video of my book or you can just super scroll.

It’s like this son!

I look the same but the image on the screen isn’t.

Bahah I am ridiculous.

What is this Etalk Daily?

I look like Madonna. Slight gap too.

Or Monroe.

In we go to the Hoxton. Kenny owns it. Bumped into him, he tells me this and my eyes go like this 0_o. Out of sight. I was trying to say how this was like Night at the Roxbury and we are living it but I lost the ability to speak at that point.

Glamorous little figurines everywhere I hope they didn’t feel ostracized by how hot they are or were last night.

I spy linds!

When opportunity knocks…

Capture the pearl necklace moment. Would you believe that was staged, he missed it initially. SPOKESPERSON. Plus point person capital me. Ok I will stop pointing that now.

Had absolutely no idea the theme of the party. I stepped into my tickletrunk, found my AA tube skirt, my one piece-piece from nearly naked (miss you dudes!) snob girl (it’s fake gucci) purse and voila. ALMOST wore the hot pink gauze around my neck, but that ages you so no. Not yet.

Tweet wall made my drink order take forever. I invented in my head that the bartendress was purposely avoiding me. Later when I moved along to the middle part of the bar, deeper, way faster to get drinks. How many did I have, Colleague?

OH right the oyster bar. I had twenty. I love yuppies and oysters, standing with yuppies while eating oysters, messing with yuppies and hogging all the condiments then braggarting my hot sauce skills. I did all of that.

Open bar too. S- Show. Classic.

The Fairlie sisters!

Coke bottle chandeliers fabulous and I never noticed. I guess colleague gets bored when I am infecting people with Raymitis. Ohh that sounds scary!

Another stunner.

Seriously serve me!

I rolled a cigarette out of my tip money. She still didn’t care.

Zzzz. I got three Jack and diets, slid one over to colleague like a smooth criminal would and made like 5 guys burn up with jealousy over him getting a drink like that. THAT is how the singer of Queens of the Stoneage passed ME a shot of (I’d love to but I can’t) vodka at sound academy. Ask Darius. Evidence here (scroll to the end and I kept the shot glass). Speaking of Sound Academy, taking a fleet to sound academy for empire of the sun tonight going to be gangbusters. It’s not sold out yet fyi.

Me and Christine and Ameet who was going to cast me in an H&M ad but couldn’t in the end cos of my tattoos (BOO!) checking us out. HI! send me more work thanks please :).

Here I am telling him off about it. I was on FIRE last night!

Here I am turning into Sharon Stone.

We had the same outfit. Brock was like who is she? He is like a mini guy raymi ahahhaa groupie. Me and casie like to push him around. He’s coming with to SA tonight.

Lisa said she liked my style regarding bringing my colleague as date/in-tow. My secret weapon.

Place was packed all night long. Estelle was the performer. Amazing divarifique :).

Sean and I are going to do another video segment together like old times. THE ISSUES! My hair is really greasy and flat and I look like Duncan. I’m gonna have to put a tattoo on that burn mark. Gnarly.

Sean & Raymi discuss the issues from Sean Ward on Vimeo.

(music by my friend Unagi, that’s his rap name real name is Brolin, still wicked).

LOVE pumped up servers! speaking of pumped up kicks i’m seeing foster the people, maybe I’ll take my dad! hey dad I have plus one for that wanna be my date? I’m also going to Portishead.

I love her hair!

Some kind of tartare what is this? Give me this I know this!

Shawn is also coming to Empire of the sun tonight.

What’s up Cory did you go to the Bunny ranch while in Vegas?

Dan Levy, do you have ANY sort of relation to Eugene or your brother, also named Dan Levy? bahahah ok I just got it. I like that you were dressed like Tom Hanks in Big and didn’t get that significance. EVEN!

Cool.

Casie’s little hat.

OMG sorry to interrupt but the thing I am singing in just made pitchfork media!!! HUGE!!!

Me and zach. He was shooting for diet coke. He always puts me in NOW when we bump into each other at concerts.

More Oysters.

Holy crap full on oyster vortex.

I terrorized that cute yuppie beside me. He liked it.

Bathed in the ATM glow with Casie.

Colleague and I provoked lots of people, you must in order to get them to come out of their shells, easily, I coax them out. Hello Mr. Nus back there. Looking good.

Yo said you were fat again. Liar.

We should do phoney ad campaigns together posing as husband and wife. “Your daddy’s rich, and our mother’s good looking…”

ROXANNE! YOU don’t have to wear that dress tonight! Hahah can you imagine a dude screaming his guts out at his woman of the night woman? Sigh.

Why do I look like putty?

Jenny we missed you!!! Project Jenny McBeth soon.

HAHAH the background the everything. This is me discovering my flipbook.

WOah relax there, get out much? nahahaaahahhahhaa.

Doesn’t take much. Oh I have welsh eyes. Know what that means hehh… ask my friend Mr. Jack Daniels about it.

So cool. Luckily I did a pin-up pose combo, I thought it was just going to be 6 stills like photobooth I dunno. This idea is way better.

Then an extra.

Hee hee we are all busting on this photo on twitter right meow.

Then I danced on the top of the stairs so everybody in the room could see me.

THIS PARTY IS MINE!

HahHAha my hair.

I thought that was the social network guy. SWOON. You have my card dude we can pretend! Steph I’m doing Steph face!

You’re my gal Val. I’m waiting on your blog post about Raymi’s Runway Tips. Brinner Soon! (Brunch at dinner time, during a hangover) (gahahahaha!)

Casie and I slightly match as usual.

I like my purse strap over the shoulder mom thing. Hard to dance with a long purse. Worth it cos I look like Heathers. Well, this is mean blog girls after all. lolz. Hisss!

My head is getting skinnier.

It was such a fabulous time thanks again!

I spy a girl that caught colleague’s eye. I got her card too! Wing girl!

Stunner!

We need to get another look. She might come to devil’s night burlesque. Hot Raymi army is growing. RAYMI ARMY Should be our burlesque name cos then I get to jumble it around like Army Raymi yarmi amy? Uh confusing.

My arm is ripped and I fanned the crowd with Christine’s purse fan. I am nice to the world. I felt bad for those wearing leather jackets inside a club as their outfit. I didn’t even bring a scarf cos I knew it would be sweltering.

Had many roast beef rolls throughout the night.

Kept saying OK JUST ONE MORE lol.

Groovy.

Trippy I like.

Neat.

Getting ready for Estelle.

She just went from my hair to her hair and I said that’s interesting as I lived many years with YOUR hair. We are going to be great friends.

SUCH a great performance. I spied Kardinal in the crowd, we go way back:

She was perfect. I boogie’d.

Lauren O’nizzle looked like a politician’s wife. Without missing a beat she waved like Jackie O. I almost wore my bow headband. I wore bow earrings instead. Too much bow.

Side stage view was grand.

Why are you behind a pillar?

I look like Eileen here (my nana). OH COME ON EILEEN! I spy Dekel.

Cutie cutie cutie!

And I spy Shawn again. I overheard two girls discussing Estelle’s skinnyness ooh good point something else to be envious of.

Then there is the “other” world of Raymbo Bright you’ll be experiencing some of pretty soon, the music “industry” part. That’s Dekel.

We go way back, but who cares I certainly don’t!

And from the cheap seats.

Dance party!

Classic!

Hi Kenny!

There’s the mark zuckerberg actor guy behind me ahha and we both look uhhh…

More good looking people.

Ok time to go.

They were girl versions of tin toy sexy soldiers.

I made them do this. SPOKESPERSON!

See? I am such a Madam and they just listen. Teacher said I would make a great teacher.

HAhaha aw see how they’re still standing like that?

The one on the left looks like Megan Fox.

See!

Fabulous Night thanks for the treats Diet Coke :).

Want captain Raymbo to cover your party with my colleague? E: raymi@raymitheminx.com I’d love to! (While finishing this my blog traffic/numbers were cranked. Not one cuss word to be found in this post either could ya tell?)

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