Hey there dudes got a question for ya, does this look like an oven to you?

Well to some cray Austrian artist genius guy it does. Can you tell what it is? If you follow along I will show you. Too bad Bech didn’t come she’s Austrian too.

Tat sent me deets on a foodiexclusive rehearsal/media preview of the TORONTO CARRETILLA INITIATIVE (huh?) some fancy arty thing that’s part of Luminato Festival. I thought it sounded like a unique concept (housing it at Brickworks was a good tip-off), something fun to try, and at the very least a reason to wear my floral apron plus free grub and entertainment. You’ll get a chance to check it out in the Distillery and some other places from the 9th of June to the 17.

There, that was easy! Hmm LA Weekly you don’t say. So basically they clamp a bunch of shopping carts together with cutting boards and mini propane tanks and stoves in a U-assembly-line formation and then get a-cooking. It goes set-up, prep, eat, dismantle then skidaddle. That’s pretty cool, novel, and I love a group participation pitch-in activity. It makes cooking way easier. You too can also sign up to get in line and help out, stick a kid in there why don’t you they are the best little helpers and you don’t have to lift a finger plus cutting garlic stresses me out.

Colleague said there was media royalty there yeah duh obviously. We saw Mr. Mintz but then he was gone before I could chat him up. You might recall this piece on me in the Star he wrote. Great headline, dad we should have it plaqued ha ha.

That was a great meal and we all got tanked, kind of, sort of. Right Rob? I have to re-html that blog post’s photos before I can link to it. My To Do list just bulged at the buckle. Oh intern! Corey wouldn’t allow my cellphone technology to make his food look fugly so I drew funny MS Paint drawings instead to kind of get around that, what an a-hole right? (what me or him lol).

Delicious and scary!

Anyway…

This apron is massive but you can cinch it up teeny weeny. I wore it to Barque Smokehouse afterward because I was not done eating. It’s a total decorative apron I will probably lose my mind if I actually get food on it, which I did, a pocket full of brisket ah gaaad.

Two dishes were up on offer. One sweet and the other savoury, you guessed it. Here I am inspecting the sweet one. Any guesses?

It’s gnocci! With icing sugar on it whaaaaaaat? Plus poppy seeds! Oh get out of town. It was the softest most oowy-gooey disintegrate-on-your-tongue gnocci I’ve ever had, so fresh, like just invented fresh. The sugar was an interesting blend with the poppy seeds, although I definitely pitch for the savoury team I will never turn down food. It’s rude and that’s not the right attitude. I get really offended by picky eaters, sometimes even allergies. How dare your gluten sensitivities hurt that poor baguette’s feelings! There, there, little baguette. I will eat you. Munch munch, all better now as I scowl hard at you haha kidding. (I don’t kid).

Gotta love food artists. Love messing with them cos they take it so seriously, only once my belly is full though, beforehand it’s all manners for days then once your little grilled cheese sandwich (Ruby Watch co. wink wink) is in my hands and in my mouth, gloves are off.

I will beet you senseless! I will beet you at anything I beet! This was the savoury one, the garlic smell was palpable throughout and flavour too and at the bottom of the beet pile was more of that baby soft gnocci mm mmm there goes a skinny day out the window. Good thing I did lots of sit-ups and tricep extensions the night prior. And I went on a psycho run before colleague picked me up.

Verdict: Beets were born to stain white cotton. BORN TA! So I better get this in my mouth quick. Also I was fungry.

And that’s what it looks like all put together.

So friggin’ cool.

I tried to mask my runner’s hair, did I succeed? Sometimes you can do a sloppy braid and adorn yourself in lots of glitz and colour and they might not notice.

Alexa and I discuss my hair. I self-deprecated (as usual), caught myself and said JUST TAKE THE COMPLIMENT and we all agreed. Thank you for helping me better myself Alexa! Lets do lunch sometime.

I really like this picture of us too.

I made him take my picture doing this cos I gave myself a hand washing complex when in fact I do it all the time and the last time I went to Lee’s or Sound Academy was ages ago I probably wash my hands 40 times a day. Ok maybe half that.

Ahhhhhhhh sweet clean endorphins release relief.

They were ahead of schedule so some of the assembly line action was missed and baby didn’t have to get messy but I still wanted the photo opp, always get the photos kids.

But then faking to making it quickly turned in to actually making it oh great. Whenever I am hamming it up I always get busted but then I strike a pose like what they are seeing is supposed to be happening and raymi voodoo hypnotizes them in to my trap.

He’s got me in his sights, I have poppy seed butter in mine.

I wanted to at least “do something” so I grated parm on his gnocci. I even screwed that up. Only just a little

My aim and projectory was slightly off, I don’t think I grated any on to the ground I could barely get a good grate on. Well no, I think I did three good ones in succession. Hi, I’m dumbing it down, have we met? I’m pretty sure I said, “I can’t think of everything!” Lol. I’m always practising my peewee herman tv show dialogue. GOOD MORNING MR. T CEREAL!

I offered to help dismantle then kicked myself because I did not actually want to do it but then I dug the hole deeper in bragging about handy girl skills like Sayed (#lost) building houses for a not for profit charity collective and now I am pissed all over for Rebecca ruining the end of lost for me, I haven’t seen the final two episodes. COOL THANKS DUDE!

I think wearing an apron to food feature gigs could be part of my “thing” also I have the matching platter to this so you could stick me in some bizarre a la eyes wide shut secret society party. If you like that kinda thing I recommend seeing Sleeping Beauty btw. No not that one, this one.

You might recognize that chick from Sucker Punch (another wicked flick). Anyway…

The man himself! Rainer Prohaska.

Cool guy, Can tell he’s deep and thoughtful. We didn’t speak too much (I kind of just babbled) but I felt the aura, the, chocolate, sound of music austrian spirit emanating from him. Ooh I want to go hang out on a mountain in a nice little cottage now I will have to schedule some serious daydreaming Tumblr time in the very near future.

I’m still hungry lets go somewhere, but where?

Will they make fun of me if I wear my apron? Does it look like I care? Mom those are the black pants you gave me they made me look like a server. That was my intention for some reason. A little PR girl here, housewifey there, what-e-ver.

FTS!

Our last joyride in colleague’s car. He sold it and was late collecting me cos he almost got a speeding ticket. That is so colleague worst luck ever with tickets. Gave me more time to work on my hairstyle.

Here is a list of the upcoming menu schedule for the Carretilla Inish in TO. Bake em away toys!

Schedule: TORONTO CARRETILLA INITIATIVE

June 9

12:00 PM, Distillery Historic District

“Austrian Potato Soup”

3:30 PM, Distillery Historic District

“Italian Potato Soup”

6:30 PM, Distillery Historic District

“French Potato Soup”

June 10

12:00 PM, Distillery Historic District

“Simple Potatoes with Salt and Butter”

3:30 PM, Distillery Historic District

“Potato Cheese”

6:30 PM, Distillery Historic District

“Tyroler Gröstl”

June 11

12:00 PM, David Pecaut Square

“French Potato Soup”

June 12

12:00 PM, David Pecaut Square

“Tyroler Gröstl”

5:30 PM, Berczy Park

“Tyroler Gröstl”

June 13

12:00 PM, David Pecaut Square

“Tortilla”

5:30 PM, Fort York

“Tortilla”

June 14

12:00 PM, David Pecaut Square

“Gnocchi”

June 15

12:00 PM, David Pecaut Square

“Gnocchi Leftover”

3:30 PM, Loblaws at Maple Leaf Gardens, 60 Carlton

“Potato Cheese”

June 16

12:00 PM, Evergreen Brick Works

“Austrian Potato Soup”

June 17

12:00 PM, David Pecaut Square

“Austrian Potato Soup”

Raymbo out.

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