heard u were lookin for me

Hello its been awhile. Thirteen days, to be exact. Which is a short while if you consider my infrequency yadda yadda ya. I’m ready if you are.

I felt like I was in the mood to blog yesterday and today but now here I am and uhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Hey is that that “cell phone charger” purse everyone made fun of Kim Kardashian for not too long ago? I think it is or something thereof and now I want it… so small and compact, for all the clubbing that I do not do.

One Christmas, two ago, I showed up to my Nana’s wearing this and my mom was wearing a red plaid shift dress too. We have had this happen many times over the years it’s a cosmic like mother like daughter thing, with no prior planning or talking, it just happens.

This post is just an old fashioned smattering. Blogging for the sake of blogging. Blog and telling. Honestly, the good things that happen just from pressing publish here sometimes y’all might just try it for yourselves huh? Talk less shit and do more shit.

How to make friends: buy some.

Hi girls.

Bedridden all weekend basically movie after movie bender. We went out for Mr. Greek Sunday early night and it was DEAD. The soup sucked. The salad, okay.

I don’t mind the post apocalyptic vibe after watching infinity end of the world movies this weekend. This setting would be trashed if that were real. I know they hooked it up with Dollarama decorations as there was one in the parking lot and I used MY BRAIN.

Looked normal but was bland. Needed soup all the same ah suppose.

Not the best foodie photo in terms of subject.

On my walk home the other night. This store always has a cute display alack I’m not into clutter I have enough but I appreciate the artwork. We are drawn to things that remind us of things we once experienced or owned, another time period.

I’m blessed I don’t have a sweet tooth. I love photographing sweets though, decadent, colourful, darling confectionaries that they are. I can’t walk by a Fortino’s bakery showcase without getting whiplash on my phone camera arm capturing those bad boys fast enough. Stay tuned on this though I just recalled something I have coming down the pipeline for y’all regarding dessert.

I think this is the Kylie lipstick app. It’s basic. I dun curr.

My NEXT post will be about the ADVENTURES OF RAYMARIE. Get it? Marie and me? BYE BRANGELINA.

Big appreciator of the Burlington sunset game. It’s always gorgeous from the vantage point of this parking lot. It is the best I don’t care how much suburban shit is in the way.

Oh hi there you’ve been indoctrinated into the Burlington town club :).

I do it’s true. It stems from year’s back during my early hey day of emo selfies gazing into the lens trying to out-stare myself. I am the subject, I am the artist gazing back at. Some people have resting bitch face, me? Stoic. Because my mind is sizing up everything before me, calculating shit I is busy guy. I also admire the vacancy a la editorial aesthetic.

I love Toronto. You get to go on a magical Christmas adventure everywhere you turn.

Last week Monday and now she’s back in Mumbai honestly one of my greatest lesser known lowkey pals, cos of that whole doesn’t live here thing but we’re all huge fans. Come back soon!

Nostrils check. jk. I was just so tired-looking this day it seemed to be the only flattering angle to get me at. I worked at wework this day because a mystery package arrived of beautiful psychedelic lipsticks and sometimes the universe is like Raymi here, you need some more disco in your life and you are like yasss bitch!

This lipstain stays on hours so I don’t have to feel naked lipped like I normally am. It’s all in the details.

Yesturrrrrrday and I am okay with that.

Always take several variations of the same picture so as to ensure pissing off everybody.

Got these for my Dad lol. We should live in a society where we get paid for a brief review of every item we ever buy as to always be making money back. I’m not wrong. Like, if you wanted to know my thoughts about either of these things? You gotta pay for that even if it’s a shit review you get paid oh the things I would say about this grilled chicken pasta lean cuisine CRAP A LA CRAP right now. There is my brief review now put $1 into my account thanks bye hahaha.

Nana’s tree on fleek. Always is. Oh but if this tree could talk lol.

Sure I’m down you know it.

Work hallway.

Wedge salad I can still taste, think about, and will eat again.

This is the other bathroom at work it took me a few weeks to even discover. The other one is hella drab so I was like SWEET RELIEF when I discovered this one.

Oh hi there she is!

We shared mussels, the special. Two orders. Patrick from work was there too. It was a very chilly night.

And yes I was as I feel like I do nothing mostly, which is fine I don’t feel the burning sensation to show a non-stop cocktail party lifestyle full of fabulous shit I much enjoy the mundane simple pleasures blah blah but I do like to go out a wee bit to balance it out, the cold weather makes me feel claustrophobic from hibernation at times which makes Toronto ideal because there are just so many various pockets of entertainment for you to explore when you start climbing the walls.

Alright I get it, you get it? Have a good one!

if you hate me get in line

Hey all Happy September!

Boy, time flies like an arrow fruit flies like a banana Hey-oh!

Hi ma. Nice seein’ ya last week I’ll be in the hood again today so holla at’cher girl.

Instagram stories crop your pic like so. Meh. Sorry for phoning it in, this is us Friday on our way up north.

Yesterday at my friend Tamara’s building. Love these colours.

On my travels last night. I like creepy things… empty, haunting spaces at night.

Yep.

Legendary.

I’m a TTC convert now. Sucks when there’s delays now I get the pain of the city when shit shuts down. Hating myself moreso for allowing the uber addiction and fear of public transportation rule me and my bank account what a waste I am still paying for *swan dives off a cliff*.

Mad love for this work space.

I’d wager that the owner of this Porsche is a fun person.

Or they are colour blind.

Last weekend was beautiful weather more of that, yo!

:)

Two things. First thing, this was terribly hilarious to me at the time and the second thing is I thought it would sell this side of the bed and be more appealing. We fight over not sleeping on the inside of the bed and it worked, well I won but the unicorn didn’t actually help.

The first day of fall is in 3 days, Sept 22 *swan dives off an even bigger cliff*.

Random street pose. Dena my work gal pal indulges this behaviour big time.

I am impressed that the food at the Rhino is not as shitty as I last recall and the service is slightly less offensively slow too. It’s not the Rhino unless you recognize at least 5 people on the patio or walking by, as I did.

Burrito bowl with pulled chicken and tons of basmati rice beneath it was very good and I was an in a state of emotional eating so I ate all of it. Next time I’d share. Sometimes there is no off button for my eating/consumption like some morbidly obese people are afflicted by. I try not to live to eat but eat to live but who am I kidding it’s the former for certain.

There was a fire drill last week so I went here to use the bathroom then bumped into some colleagues and it turned into the best fire drill ever. I was not enthused by it being the day after 9/11 being in a claustrophobic stairwell crammed with people holy jeez. I use those stairs all the time anyway instead of the elevator because I’m a hyper-hypo and also yeah PTSD I need to just flee and not rely on elevators personally, and there’s those types in a crowd who will go slow and fuck it up for the rest of us and then the fast ones who will carve out a path through the herd and guess which type I am.

Another pig out day. This is after we both had a shawarma. Saw a sign for 2 for 9.50 (a great deal!) and it was delicious so much so we stayed and ordered a plate I think I immediately passed out when we got home. Great success! This week I’m doing a healthier thing so shush it up buttercups.

Last Monday or was it Tuesday, was it a long weekend last weekend? Anyway, whatever day this was was so depressing and rainy I hated it. I had to go around town to get some shit done, didn’t realize the agency I was going to had moved. So I got to spend extra time in the rain and I chose this particular course because there was a florist shoppe nearby it was all supposed to pan out from the train station I chose to travel to blah blah I kept it cool but it’s funny all the horrible thoughts that can go through one’s mind when they’re walking in the city rain. It was worth stopping to take this cute pic.

If you’re going to give flowers get something that lasts.

I may or may not have added one of these to the orchids. I JUST CANT HELP IT I’M A JAPANESE GIRL TRAPPED UP IN HURRRR.

Toronto gardens are adorable. I love those limited space ones in L’il Italy or wherever that are jam packed with crazy shit!

If you wanna come by for some backgammon lemme know.

Delish bday drank with Dena. I feel like I got a lot out of summer but I also feel like it whizzed right on by too quickly.

Weird pose I don’t care I love this dress Dena needed to go stress shopping at Winners one day at lunch time and I’m the one who ended up spending more oh well worth it. I love this dress however there is a gigantic black stain on the back from grease or some oil. Sadness. I bet I’ll wear it around xmas time for sure.

Another Raymazing pose don’t care I felt hot this day so I am owning it.

Hi again. This is what happens when you blog once a month you have a collection of hoarded photos.

TTYL thanks for dropping in these super posts take hella long and I promise you won’t have to wait a month for the next one.

You heard the sidewalk.

i’m your villain

Wagwan friends and foes, how’s your August? It’s just flyin’ by eh. Damn.

So this here is a blog post. One of the things I used to do to summarize this life I live and account for some kind of meaningful existence. I used to blog fiendishly around the age of 19 because it justified the partying I did when I lived on Crawford in Lil Italy, Toronto… the reckless behaviour everyone that age does and all of it is written down in this same blog if you can believe it.

I can remember about skipping the line at Mod Club when it was still at Lava lounge. Wednesday night was the night of the Mods in Toronto and Saturdays were Blow Up. I remember watching Esthero talk to the door guy from my spot in line and I said to myself, Raymi, when she fucks off go do the same. And I did. The door guys at Lava recognized me all the time and my annoying pushy ways so I always walked in when they’d wave me passed the peeps waiting in line. We all have had our Club 54 moments and some of us are better at remembering them than others, or bother to write about it.

I have been known to be dramatic. I have always romanticized the moments of my life. Chosen endeavours just so I could write about them or experience that weird thing. The problem is that there became too many things to write about, being so overwhelmed by that and guilted from the pile-up of things I didn’t write about… so you just social media instead. Blogs lost. Drat.

I know people out there still read because I read articles every day. I read the entire internet every day. I know what all the buzzfeed and jezebel news, pop culture, memes, celebrity breakups, deaths, disturbing breaking news stories are at all times my mind is so full of garbage, valuable and not and I am so caught up by it I don’t stop to reflect at all in fact, I crave it even more. Do you hit the hourglass on your twitter search? Well I do and that’s how you get the best fastest trending news.

Haha I love how I just bragged about reading the internet a lot. stfu raymi

I went rock climbing this week. was exhilarating. Lots of adrenaline and a great workout. Will do it again for sure. I am very competitive so if you are, you should give’r a go. We did another feature on Raymi Toronto too, check it out.

I am afraid of heights so I’m glad I could climb and put that thought out of my head. By the end of the class you’re climbing without the harness.

Don’t care how old I get a part of me will always stay young and childlike. Fun keeps you young, young looking, happy, feeling good, all that jazz. Being a miserable crab does you no good. I understand it’s hard for some people to be happy and enjoy their life, it’s partially mental illness for sure (and circumstance). You just have to keep trying. We all go through bad periods and we never think things will get better, but they do. You just can’t wish things to happen you need to take action. When you make changes that’s when good things happen. Change is good.

I think being kind of a goof is God’s doing of helping me self-preserve and protect myself from all you assholes out there. Then he sprinkled self confidence, a big mouth with a rich mind and some good looks c’est voila, work with that. Do I believe in God? I dunno. It’s like, just an expression haha. All our genetic make-ups, DNA, and personality styles that change with evolution and I don’t really know what I’m saying. Some are more cunning than others and most are said to be just, born stupid. Brainwashed masses ordinary types but who is actually smarter, them or us. Blissfully settled normal people or those who feel the pains of the world and try to do something, can’t sleep at night from anxiety and worry… but also know how to spell properly.

Saw my Hair guru Donna Dolphy yesterday and she made me pretty again.

We have a good time and then we hit the fatigue wall and just existed in silence together trying to get through the appt.

This is Dena my work friend we are both ADD meant to be. It’s a blast hanging out with her, talking and walking and girls gotta stick together we both work in boys clubs so, yeah. Luh her.

My bf says he likes leather pants so I tried some on to see what the fuss was about and if I even look good in them. 5lbs lighter, some toning, then we’ll talk.

The many musical minstrels in Toronto warm my heart. Check her out. Bravo and obviously so charming from this angle up here.

I am grateful for my life and everything in it which is why I give back as often as I can, give my time to others, and try to be selfless to balance out the good fortune.

This was after I sneaked up alone and took a selfie. Part of climbing is falling and learning how to land.

This was last Sunday. We aren’t going up this weekend cos we’re goin’ to a wedding elsewhere. Should be fun.

We went for tacos on Monday, good deal. Quality of food….ok for a “smallerish” town. The beef I was not impressed with it was ground like come on make effort. BF said get steak next time then. Agree.

I am in love with the heat right now and it did almost feel like a vacay… okay staycation I hope it stays hot for a long time. If you read my blog in August or September and October it’s the same shit every year you can hear how depressed I am, I mean READ how depressed I am about the weather changing. Oh you love fall? Why? it only leads to winter you idiot which lasts forever so STOP.

:)

Those are my safety shoes. I look like a waitress. Part of the fun of life are the costumes we wear and the manner in which we express ourselves. I like to walk softly and carry a big stick rather than overdo it glamwise. Once in awhile yes I love to dress up-UP like tomorrow I will wear two different outfits, one at the ceremony and one at the reception. I am worried about footwear though.

I asked our work neighbours across the hall to let me look out this window and see if it was raining yet then I had to take a picture I just love a good snoop, passing it along to you.

Dena took this she was like work the angles, and angle, click. Work the angle. And pose. We got it done!!!

The ghost image on the tree + doggy ftw.

that sky

The curls like instantly dropped. Too humid. Lovely while they lasted though.

ok we get it.

Okay that’s the last butt pic for awhile. I will state that I don’t feel it’s right to butt shame me I can’t help having an immaculate ass so much so that just seeing it invokes all kinds of emotions like, it’s my body it’s what I look like if my bathing suit is eaten by it it’s not my fault it’s just legs and ass grow up get over it it’s summer bye bye.

Okay I’ve had enough and you probably have too have a great weekend, don’t be a stranger and remember it’s not about what I look like it’s about the fun I am having.

Live your best life as they say.

BONUS POINTS if you can name the band who does the song that this blog post is titled as.

I’m a party girl in a party world

Hey there it’s me I’m back to say what’s up and chat a little bit before I burn out on blogging again for the next couple weeks (months) haha. There have been a few changes since we last hung out. Where to begin? In the middle probably works although if you follow me on all my socials you’ll know what gwan already – here we just elaborate more.

Let’s start with work first. We have moved offices and so far so good so awesome. It’s not too far from where I live I can just bike all the way up Sherbourne and be a sweaty mess by the time I get to Bloor BUT I get chiseled in the torso from pedaling, using my whole body and then on the way home it’s a chill-ass free fall going down south pretty easy. You heard about the bike deaths happening lately in Toronto don’t worry I am a good cyclist, I know the roads, and I don’t listen to music I am fully-alert. I think cars SHOULD slow down and chill the fuck out, there have been days when streetcars or a vehicle whomever is behind the wheel will want to race me and let me know they got around me only for me to beat them again and again just goes with the flow of traffic/congestion and bikes being able to get around like fuck off guy let me live my life and get out of your way we can all get along, right?

Something nice I did today happened as a little boy came walking down the stairs to the subway and passed me as I just got off, he was going really slow and I said to him, you can still make it – I knew the train was still there. He knew what I meant and then beat it all the way down the stairs where he no doubt got onto that subway train. I bet he was like, that lady was so nice wow and then he did something nice for someone else too hopefully. Sometimes, often times, I will say hi to strangers, randoms, cashiers, wish them a nice day or simply smile at them when I know they’re not happy and probably no one has acknowledged them as human beings like all day so I take it upon myself to be the light. Many times I can be depressed and stuck in a particular head space and it would be nice to have like everyone shine positive attention on me for a few minutes but then there are times I am like fuck off please so it’s up to you to know the difference and good luck with that.

Date night last week and I am unapologetically happy as heck because I have been boyfriend-hunting for the right one for too long now. We are fortunate that we were set up on a date by his father and we instantly connected. I am gaga right now. I love that Ariana Grande is also in a whirlwind romance right now too I can relate just block the haters out.

This is the outfit I chose to make an impression including sexy heels from my mom. My mom gave me the skirt it’s a bit big maybe I can shrink it. I showed up a bit late and it had started pouring rain, the restaurant was packed and I had to walk through the entire thing to get to their special table everyone’s head turned like a Julia Roberts who is that moment. I still have my coat check tab because we were the last ones in the restaurant and I just walked behind the curtain to get my raincoat for myself. After the date we got on the phone immediately I think he texted first and we were just totally grinning high on life I was invited to the cottage the next day as you know I went up and the rest is history.

I jumped off a 30 foot rock into the lake landing the way you do not want to land and learned a valuable lesson to point my toes when people tell you to do so, it’s more than a suggestion – it felt like hitting cement and yes it was embarrassing. My bruise is just about healed two weeks later. A girl was too scared to jump so I went up there to support although I knew I’d chicken out too and I won’t be doing that again until I practice off of less-high rock faces.

This is from Tuesday and these are some pretty important people to me, the work fam. Send off drinks for Evan whom will be missed but change isn’t the end of the world.

I tried for a Madonna look and realized it was not really work appropriate although my personality and confidence can help be part of the outfit therefore it doesn’t matter what I wear. I am stubborn and go by the beat of my own drum so it takes awhile to penetrate. My laundry in my building has been out of order for weeks and I am starting to lose my fucking mind they tell me today it will be good which means my life will be laundry for the next few days.

There he is.

When we can’t see each other we text when we can and now facebook video message. It’s nice to have a balance and someone who wants to do shit with you and you don’t have to chase. We are a good fit.

The benefits of being happy are so many. You look better and well, you’re happy. Relaxed. The hunt is over. Tired of dating people and you know within a second they’re not the one and you’re not the one and then you’re like is it ever gonna happen for me? Let’s be real, I am 35. I have definitely thought for awhile like ok am never gonna have a kid now great I will be a bitter woman for the rest of my life and look at kids and babies longingly and then go home and scream into a fucking pillow.

Another benefit is inspiration. When I am content I can blog. It centers me. I need a muse and that’s that. Empty posts of dating and dining is shallow and makes me sad and you start to take everything for granted you don’t enjoy the spoils because you’re using them to fill a void a lack of love in your life. Also, my blog post title is clearly a play on Barbie girl, which, I may be as well. It was a joke reference I made earlier this week to a work friend and then I said I will make my next blog post title that. If I have a title it’s all I need to start one up. When I sit down to write I have a general idea of what I will say here but my mind is a crazy circus most often times it’s a mystery to me too what’s gonna come out next.

I took a few days off drinking a couple weeks ago because I did not like who I was becoming and that tiny little change really helped me and then something good happened. I guess it’s true, everything you want is on the other side of fear. I still want sober days and to be better, get healthier so I will.

<3.

Hummingbirds I mean, come on. Swoon.

We kayaked and it was very magical. I’ll be getting a siamese cat tattoo on my back right shoulder next window I get.

If you know what the Hell this is please let me know. He visits a lot. All the bugs that fly at me cos of my hair or whatever startle me and I shriek and then people are like good grief. Okay sorry I can be dramatic but wouldn’t you be if a June bug flew at your mouth and head and then another giant moth and then THIS MOTH too? Okay I will upload the video as evidence and you can decide if it’s worthy of screaming.

I think you know what my vote is.

This coat tho.

This dog tho.

Of course I chose the Dubble Bubble as it’s one of my many nicknames (no it isn’t).

Working across from the Bay will slay (my wallet).

I have a hat thing. If you want to donate toward it I will gladly accept.

On sale for 11 bucks. Get your Canada Day swag in time my fellow Canucks and don’t forget to buy Canadian.

We went hiking + cave exploring in Collingwood and it was beautiful. I’m hyper-active I need to be taken on walks, hikes, drives, dinners, etc etc so this suited me just fine.

Love the digs here we have two floors to play around on.

This is my bestie Marie she did my nails and leant me these pants to bike home in. She is a very supportive gf, positive, and helpful. I am very grateful to have her in my life she is as smart and compassionate as she is beautiful.

I wore bike booty shorts this day and it was freezing cold out I am an idiot sometimes just don’t tell anyone. I look forward to my next chrome nail manicure Marie!

We have matching Unicorn lipsmackers obviously.

What time was this taken at? I know, but do you?

The bruise was just forming here ok ttyl gotta go have an excellent day and weekend to be continued…

was gonna/didn’t wanna

Hello and thanks for stopping by. I feel like if (once) I have my blog redesigned it will be easier to get back into the swing of things here. Maybe I am boring myself with all the selfies. They are kind of like, really shitty trophies. Personal vanity accomplishments. They stake a place in my timeline and when I post them I can either disassociate or I can recall, or say nothing at all.

As someone with a big mouth, I tend to err on the side of stfu more so than in the past. I used to air everyone’s dirty laundry here (mostly my own) and didn’t have a clue, or a filter. The next day during the hangover, texts and emails would come in telling me to remove this, this, and that. A picture. I was pretty greedy with this content because it was always the juiciest, best part of the story I would have to delete. Like the punchline. No fair.

Anyway, I just like reasons to excuse myself from being more assertive here, diabolical blogging, and consistency overall.

This drink is called the BECK Taxi. Lol. It’s supposed to resemble their colours.

I wonder what my cholesterol is and then I stop wondering.

Me today.

This weekend’s weather was bullshit and hilarious considering Toronto’s snowplow contracts were up and yet it was a four day assault of slush ice rain snow etc etc. Walking to lunch on Monday was Hell. Over 700 collisions over the weekend too. Suffice to say I didn’t go out once. Okay once to the supermarket for wine and beer huzzah.

ya know how I likes me emo face.

Yep ’tis I.

Can’t wait to get ripped and fit and just be able to power walk outdoors without freezing. This is why I hate fall because I know winter lasts forever and once that warm weather goes it’s GONE BRO.

Attempting to smile and be good looking here it’s almost like I am obsessed or something.

This pic makes me feel cold.

Dumb ship in our way ruined the shot. I kinda like it though.

Love my dumb-dumb dramatic poses.

Just here to inspire y’all.

woah relax.

This shirt is still the bee’s knees.

Oh hi there my sweet Marie MISSU.

Okay I think I’ve said enough for now. Just keeping tabs on you keepin’ tabs on me have an excellent one!

You can BRO your own way.

What’s up hate watchers. Hello, hello, hell yo.

There’s a party jam across the hall after work today and it’s bling-themed so I thought I’d wear neon yellow to claim as much fucking attention as I can. The full outfit will come together more so as the day progresses because it’s hot as Hell in here and cold as fuuuuuck outside suffice to say the jogging pants stay on no matter how stupid I look in jogging pants and high heels (it kind of really works) BUT a maintenance man called me BEAUTIFUL. I think it was the tats and the battitude, the Hulk Hogan, and the fact I used my real name. Gloaters gotta gloat!

Yesterday.

They say people photograph the things they fear losing most. I guess you could surmise for me it’s my beauty. Of course but really, this is just trying to nail down ONE SELFIE where I think I look other-worldly hot. Sometimes the filter on my instagram doesn’t kick in and full disclosure I NEED THAT SHIT BIG TIME SOMETIMES. Fax brugh. Anyway, my phone is old but functions still and since I favour old world tech (am stingy and not like the regular masses like you who thrive on the newest) I have to mash-up filter effect with an old phone. You know how sometimes my pictures look like I took them with a potato? Ya dass me.

Went to DX3 Canada again this year and I HAVE THOUGHTS. Kidding. Well not but no these are my tech friends, I run in this crowd and I like my homies I think they like me and I always meet new ones so let me know if you want to join sometime because they always happen anyway and it’s nice to have a crew it leads to more business and that leads to more money seen?

I went like Jimminy Cricket as usual. Sometimes I am obscenely not in the mood to talk, stand out, think, and/or feel anything and then for the same token I am usually in a get-up like this galloping around with my long ass legs and wonder why people look. Booth people get bored so basically anyone walking by will light them up it was a big effort to avoid eye contact with everybody so I ended up watching an entire start-up pitch thing in the back corner which my ADD will not always permit so all in all, cool?

Couldn’t even tell you what day this was. It used to be I could tell time by my outfits but now I couldn’t tell you my ass from a hole in the ground. I do have a funny and inappropriate story about that necklace but I can’t say it here so sorry for bringing it up and NO do not use your imagination.

Jim had us over for the Oscars and dinner and oh my fuck I need to get him a thank you present still. I met his amazing gal pal Jenn who showed up wearing the exact red rose shirt I own(ed) and is MIA have never seen since wearing it only once so I was like thanks for stealing it person whom I have never met before. It was a really good time Jim kicked me out by one and I had a wicked hangover the next day WORTH IT. Jim said he was delicate too ahhaa.

*caption redacted*.

This dressing was SO good.

This space is so drastic from my own I think my attraction could also be attributed to the view. I am obsessed with people watching in only that they are easily visible and you catch glimpses of these humans undertaking their mundane life things in these expensive boxes in the sky of a city no one can actually afford to live in and it stresses me out whereas the view outside of my own windows are of a completely different Toronto and it stresses me out in an entirely different way.

I have so much to say but am running out of steam let’s just quietly take this one in.

I was actually looking for my black dress with the plunging open cleavage but could not find it so wore this one and that’s that.

Ya I have a belly my period came in like a wrecking ball the next day. Once I start biking again I’ll be chiseled as fuck. Promise. Also I do not really care about being “juicy” if a guy doesn’t dig it I don’t care. I don’t care about anything really. It might be a problem? Nihilism? Close to Narcissism eh?

A colleague recently ripped on me for the dog ears filter I periodically rock. He said it was, fuck, who cares what he said but it resulted in me hating him for a fews days LOL.

That’s Heather my bestie I showed up in peach and she put her peach shirt on and we peached out she’s such a little peach.

BTW it’s my birthday in 15 days. I will be 35. I remember when people said this would be sad if I did it in my 40’s. Don’t care then don’t care now. It’s life documentation and everybody does it.

I know however that they meant it would be sad if I continued in this particular vein but, where are they? Because here I am and also, fuck you ha ha.

I did learn how to stfu a bit more about my personal deets although a picture can say a thousand words it can also leave a lot out and you will never know unless you’re a goddamn detective or KNOW how to read between my lies..err lines.

okay tgif got me like gots to go now yo thanks for being you!

issa Raymbo vibe

Hey y’all hope you’re a superfan or can stomach a fuck ton of selfies. Both!

This is my David Bowie look. I posted a selfie years ago and an internet buddy responded in kind with a picture of David Bowie doing a dramatic looking off into the distance pose so every time since it comes to mind. Creative collaborators should always be looking over the fence at what the other guy is doing and taking some of that magic back with them.

I bought a new outfit and then we didn’t even go out. We made it downstairs to the bar then the mood passed. Whatever. No hangovers this weekend for it. I really like the green bomber coat I bought too, you’ll have to wait to see that didn’t take any pics of the whole ensemble.

I wish I got the skirt in a smaller size. Oh well. I got the small, I figured an xs would be ostentatious.

Feeling the black and white look.

Brown boots and black do not go I know the rule. I smash it but also I had these black heeled booties beneath my desk at work for a month, suede? I haven’t sprayed them I’m protective of them so they only made it down the road. I’m glad people didn’t dance all over them for sure they’d be toasted.

Someone bought a scale so now I know my number. I am pretty chill about my body these days as in I am fine with being juicy which is a nice and sassy way of saying I am kind of a sexy blob. Curves and all that are acceptably hot now thanks KardASSians. No really. Thank you. But I do miss my bike body and the endorphin rush that it brings and money saving cycle psycho insanity I receive. Last season I didn’t start riding my bike to work until mid-July so only got about that in shape which was pretty good but this season I’m taking my bike out way earlier than that. Let’s meet back here in September and see how much of a turbo-babe I am cool thanks.

It’s a bit big I am hoping once I start wearing it and shrink it mayhaps the sideboob will mellow yellow out. It fits fine as fuck everywhere else tho baleeee that. I got another cute one-piece to round out my collection. The Michael Kors (navy blue) one I got I don’t want it to get destroyed from over-usage and chlorine, kk.

Sometimes life is ruff.

I really like the rainbow filter. I come by the selfie honestly as I kind of started it. Facts. Anyway, filters did not exist back then and just cos I am egocentric doesn’t mean every selfie posted over the years has been stellar so now it’s a new toy to play with. Just cos women age doesn’t mean they age ugly or look ugly every day as an “aged” person. I have been told so many times what am I gonna do when I’m ugly, or lose my looks (I have one colleague/friend who has NO FILTER WHATSOFUCKINGEVER) and I’m like, “will still take selfies”. I picture myself like a quirky Yoko Ono Tori Amos weirdo sort, it’s not just about the beauty, the aged beauty but about the moment and feeling evoked therein, the outfit, the fashion… and as ugly as I may (soon to be/am now) there’s always plenty way more ugly than me. AND. Filters. As previously mentioned.

With the right attitude you really can wear whatever you want. Don’t worry. I get roasted on occasion when necessary. Luckily I am a caricature of a human, “a brand” if you will and I live in Toronto where anyone still playing this late in the game wrought with Peter Pan syndrome really can drag it out as long as they fucking want. Long story short, rock jeans like a ball gown and a ball gown like jeans and you can get away with it. Like the time I wore a bathing suit and daisy dukes at the casino. We went to check on the car where it was parked in the beaches, got in, and just drove. Won a lot of money too. Life is wild…

…basically this is to say that I slept over and all I had was the work shirt from the day before so I needed a shirt to wear lol. It was cold this day and rainy I didn’t have a cardigan or hoodie but I had the Christmas blanket hoarded at my desk which I wore like a wizard cape for a bit. It looked Raymazing.

Had a great time in a fabulous home in Oakchill last weekend with my mom. Thanks Tray! Love you love you love youuuu!

I tweeted everything while there. Marie goes, is that a bowl of diamonds? Yes. It is exactly that.

Julie said this was like looking into my future, this pic of mom and I. Well good. I’ll be a lucky woman if I get to age like me ma’am.

Next time I will make more effort in the clothing I pack. I can make it work but it’s always this thrown together garbage that if I wasn’t so fucking cool would be like who is this idiot? I am glad I bought that pink toque, it stops people in the street and they talk to me. One guy was like PINNNNNNNNNNNNNNK and I just went, “yes” then everyone around us laughed. Shit like that. There are comedians all around us. Embrace them.

Oakville is a special place to me. 1. I was born there. 2. I have hung out everywhere, know so much town gossip and history generations over it’s a nostalgic punch in the face everywhere I go. Like for instance, this used to be the Bearded Collie and when I was little I was practicing my dance moves in here with Sarah and I knocked a waitress’ tray as she went by me. It was a disaster. Then years later it was our watering hole for awhile and many, many, many other embarrassing things happened here okay not many just one that I am too embarrassed to recount for you now for some reason but trust me it was LEGENDARY. The worst. HAHAHAHAa.

swoon.

A very magical place.

It was cold af.

The champers was flowing.

Gosh this super post just keeps going.

The service was slow, they were slammed so I get it. My order was messed up too. I was chill but enjoyed my table mates complaints about it all. When she walked away after taking our complex order I said wow there is no way she going to remember that? After 3 things my brain shuts off and I have to write it all down.

I said no hash browns. I got em anyway. They are so delicious I had to eat them. We saved some for the birds. I got cold slices of tomatoes later on which I didn’t eat. I said don’t you grill these? She said no as if I was insane. Yes. Because grilled tomatoes as substitute would be impossible…if you only…had…a grill back there.

It’s so easy to fatten up on weekends. Too easy.

Fed the shit hawks and ducks.

Mom wore my cat hat. Also by the way if you need your house painted, let us know.

Whoops.

When I christened myself as Raymi I knew then what I know now that it is the BEST CUTEST NAME IN EXISTENCE AND EVERYTHING SHOULD BE CALLED RAYMI.

My mom has mad fashion style.

Gotta have my pinks

Mom said we look snapped here. Snapped. Nice slang mom.

I didn’t have a bawth here. Should I have?

Corporate whimsy look.

Someone tried to say these cat filters are ugly. Um. This same person is full of shit. Cats are adorable. Illogic really irks me.

Proving a point.

David Bowie emo look. Yes I do work at work this is at the end of the day lol.

Water baby forever.

It’s the bandeau, relax.

Well, thanks for stopping by! Have an excellent Sunday.

Raymi in a b o x

As with all magazine features, there is a q&a that goes into a black hole when there’s a lack of space issue. Which delights me because now I can funnel a bunch of views to my blog and use that content for my damn self so without further ado, read on little buddy. This is what I thought about myself in July.

What’s one word that best describes your box portrait experience?

It was an empowering experience and I am really glad I braided my hair that morning plus wore those dangly earrings, it really worked out.

How did you feel afterwards?

I felt pretty pumped, proud and accomplished. A few friends expressed interest in getting naked in the box themselves. Seeing is believing so once they saw the magic that the simplicity of boxed nudes can be, it just spread from there. I don’t think they ever got around to it so now I imagine they’d be kinda pissed at themselves.

What was the reaction of your family/partner/friends?

Awesomeness and a funny facebook thread. I am renowned for my past with nudes so I am pretty sure some people were like whatever Raymi. You still get a thrill each time you undress and despite considering myself a bit of a nudist, I still get shy.

Would you pose naked outside of a box? And how do you think the box changed things?

As previously mentioned I’ve gone buff before. I think I’d pose nude again if I had full creative control, great lighting, props, setting, location, and concept. I guess that sounds control freakish but you gotta do you. I’m into outdoor nudity in places you wouldn’t expect.

What was the last thing that you did that scared you?

I hung out with Miss World Canada beauty queens for a few days subjecting myself to jealous personal comparisons and accepting the aging process. It actually wasn’t scary after all. I enjoyed momming them a bit.

What do you wish people understood more about you?

How charming and witty I actually am. More people deserve to experience me in real life and have the pleasure of my humour. A lot of people think I am crazy which I chalk up to a big misunderstanding and sexism. I am simply a self-assured go-getter whom also happens to be an unbridled genius. I’m special I know it and exploit it for personal gain. One must, no?

How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?

19

In what ways are you the same as your childhood self?

I have arrested development. I was thinking about this in my uber ride en route to work this morning. I’m OLD but I have no intention of aging, maturing, or ever growing up any time soon.

Thanks to HOLR Magazine and to Mike Parker