My time is limited, henceforth valuable.

I am ripping myself off for my blog birthday yeah fuuuuuckeeng right I’m awesome. Maybe I’ll give you a little more 411 on some of the randoms I’ll come across as some images in my archives seem to have disappeared/didn’t make the migration SO I cannot do the chronological blog year 2000-2013 of a photo of me from each year, I will try to stay true to that but here’s a smattering of oldies from each era. Lol.

ps. Joey and I up there are being interviewed about something here, Net Neutrality mayhaps. Then we spoke on a panel about it at the Gladstone an everyone said we sounded like Paris and Nicole afterward. JEALOUS. We were like, you need help? You gotta dumb this shit down for reals. Then they got all geeky on it. See exactly my point, if no one cares no one helps. Stop it. We mean girled them right back. Daps Sass. xo.

Well here is one of me from my London/Oxford UK my tube pass mug shot and I look like a Japanese cartoon character. Note I was a devoted Vice, uh devotee since I was 16. That is where Invented Raymi the Minx on their message boards I was very passionate about that and lurked them from England blabbity blahhh. I blame this cut on Milla Jovovich i was like I look like that bitch and she is rocking that f-ing haircut in Joan of Arc ughhhh. I was in England for a Writer’s Craft Journalism course that I aced. I partied but I didn’t miss a class.

I also like to draw did you know that? I have a side idiot art blog called DRAWING BAD. Indeed guy!

Don’t ask me how old I am here but wow, just wow. Embarrassing an awesome at the same time what nerve I had man also what nerve being so awesome. This got flagged on youtube I danced to something else and an illustrater sketched me as a cartoon, I’l track that down too remind me they’re awesome.

Oh here they are. Ok tht one is huge I’m too lazy to fix it.

Omg his stuff is amazing he has done a lot on me check it out. Much obliged thank you.

I’ve never seen this one before and I think it is based on this video of me being a hippie.

Wow I can’t even watch that one lol.

Here I am on my ten year anniversary party and wow what is this pageant wars? YES ALWAYS!

This night was nuts I could have bagged a famous bro but I went the high road. Carly and I lost our shit about it in the bathroom though and we were also in the middle of hanging out with Uncle D the Ass Man all in all and insane night but super fun and weird. This is the basement of Tattoo.

One of my first talks and I rocked it and I was nervous and Sean Ward and I drank beer to pre-game the jitters then it got fun and I learned a lot plus became rather pumped up about myself and here I am actually showing them my traffic stats which were mega insane at the time but OMG unheard of today! LOL. I made them pay me too that was important. Official.

This picture is gangster. Sorry for choosing all the same hair era pics I shall try to diversify I think I’m stealing your bandwidths too a am searching in flickr for raymi the minx.

Me at 19 in NYC. That was probably one of the most cray periods in my life, well one of two but all rock and roll pure n through and when my blog first exploded into popularity I was a cult hit Two years in. Now I am as boring as marmalade heehee.

Warwick Castle, me 17. Being a cheeky piece of shit. Look how hopelessly I dressed, that hair had many different elements I was also into Republica, was in England it was cutting edge. I choped off Rapunzel waist length blond hair. I am an idiot. I altered my life.

Me last September with hair extensions in. hair hair is getting to be long yeah yeah I say that aaaaaaaaall the time. These extensions are in Holland right meow.

She Does the City made this about me. Jen rules. Congrats on the Baby!

Err me in a fat period in NYC 2006/7?

March just before I met my bf in Aruba, In this photo my life is completely different an I have no idea whaat every pohoto is like that then haha nevermind. This is doing my head in “looking back” and all that. Al owe rented a movie. It’s my dad’s actual birthday. How odd is it that I should start a blog on the same day as his birthday? It’s all in my archives check it out yourselves.

Fan art.

Me in Oxford at 17.

When I was on the front page of Youtube.

One of my blog banners from when I was 25.

My roommate when I lived in Brooklyn. We were together when 9/11 happened. She has twins now an I am now the age she was when we lived together.

Nana Papa and I just chilling out.

Blondetourage <3 4EVR.

This is my vimeo avatar and I am never going to change it ever because I will never ever look that good ever again. Well maybe we’ll see haha.

20 in NYC. That restaurant is gone now.

Have a wonderful day! Thanks for watching :)

quad blogger from raymi lauren on Vimeo.

Happy Birthday Julia Blogerts! 14 Years and you still won’t shut up. I’ll always be your Raymesy.

not what it is but that it is

Hi everyone. First let me preface this by blaming everything on you in some capacity that is somewhat feasible to fall for, then I will say I wanted to leave the muchos important post below room to breathe before I started in about my stupid self again. It’s my ex’s Brother-in-law if you must know *bombshell* like thee ex, yes, that one. Although there’s like several of them (shrug) it’s the only one that matters as far as I’m concerned. As much as I enjoy lurking a couple of ‘em on twitter just to see how much I can repulse the shit out of myself, they were really nothing to me in hindsight.

Anyway a FT job kinda saps you of your blogging mojo now I get all the fuss over people whining about me being such a good blogger cos I didn’t have a 9-5, yeah whatever I am still exceptionally interesting, talented, funny and good looking though so there’s really no excuse other than the infrequency of blog posts and me-time that I’d rather spend geeking out online because I am one of those needs to be alone types to wind down. Trust me there’s a line up for my dance card and it’s flattering but I get the sense that some people are beginning to get T-O’d with my no-shows. Like sorry I’m a hermit on the best of days.

The last thing I want to do on my day off is get on a train to Toronto, and walk. Or think. I want to be a babbly mess in a blanky pretty much. Man I’m crabby, just go with it. This is me as a crazy person in Chapters at some point on the weekend. Then two old chicks sat down beside/behind me and talked. I lasted all of twenty minutes before I passive aggressively sighed and left to sit by the kid’s train toys thing where more loudness and playing happened right in front of me but then I was like dammit I’m here committing to this Mexican chair loud ladies talking stand-off that they didn’t even notice was going on. Old me would have blasted them away with something snippy, but new me is cool, calm and collected and thinks about the know-it-all fugly troll inner-monologue of judgement and disdain for your hero. It’s a book store. Basically a library, so why are you chewing the fat in the only designated reading section you lazy self-entitled gas bag cows?

Red 2 is a little too campy but still super good. It’s hard to enjoy movies sometimes when you’re too busy deconstructing every goddamn element like a Scorsese dickhead or something but I just can’t help having an analytical mind that 1. catches everything and 2. is always right about those things. For example how they always play dopey music whenever Mary-Louise Parker is doing something, “acting” I mean. This is to show us that it’s quirky and, it’s safe. No offense to her she is pleasing to look at and the make-up was cosmetic, lighting great and I’m sorry she died in Fried Green Tomatoes I really am but her schtick is tired and painful at times. But I championed her rival comeuppance/alongside Catherine Zeta-Jones.

Oh yeah, on Thursday it’s my blog’s fourteen year anniversary. I will definitely blog that day. I don’t know why but it’s like blog law to blog on your blog birthday. Next year will be 15 years omfg so I guess I have to so something incredible for that milestone I’m thinking something artistic like get Banksy with it. Who the hell even knows what a year from now will even look like. Our shoes will be flying with exhaust pipes on the side.

Yeah I dunno. Yolo.

I threw half of this out, it got cold and I wasn’t feeling it anyway. Tomorrow I have frozen swedish meatballs THRILLHOUSE!!!!

On birthdays they do a solid and get food, throw a party whatevs so we had Mexican. I had a chicken rice bowl. It was awesome. Hence why I have swedish meatballs on lock down tomorrow. If this blog post is too intense for yo I will understand if you stop reading right now. Bye.

Same day (as the top photo of me) moments apart in window light. Selfie pro-tip I mean, I do not at all look this pretty IRL in real life I look like Ja’mie, yes a dude in drag (with pretty eyes) I am cool with it. Or Lady Gaga, we both have the big nose fucked up face that is somehow attractive thing going on that I have mastered the art of appearing to be good looking for fourteen years and that my friends is why I should win the lifetime achievement award so I can just move on and get full-fat already holy geez good grief.

There’s a bottle of vodky in there somewhere YOLO.

Oh yeah baby what’s my name. This is a stupid license plate yeah go ahead haters track them down and tell them I said that not like everyone else in Ontario hasn’t already said the same thing. When was that a good idea? Never gonna regret that one? It’s almost as stupid as tattooing MINX on your arm I mean, what an idiot.

Do you think you’ll be remembered or go down in infamy and even if you go down in infamy will they still remember you?

Fourteen years eh.. I remember it just like it was yesterday, starting this thing knowing it would make me famous and all I would have to do is minx the fuck out of people with my writing and my emo face and wild nonsense. AKA be myself.

Should I be MORE successful to date? Heck yeah. Should I have made more effort? Oh yes. The blogging industry has imploded in on itself. I know that I am the real article, originator… you know all bloggers have to kiss each other’s asses and they all despise one another, cut each other’s grass and only appear when one or the other is “doing better” to get the spill-over then go on to brag about themselves. Rise above that shit, be above branding. The moment we started talking about ourselves as brands it was all fucking down hill from there, we got greedy real quick and sold out. Everyone knows sell-outs die out.

I’m happy to still be an old school blogger, a purist. An idiot talking about what I ate and who annoyed me in suburbia that day. I don’t know what the next chapter will be but I know it’s not the final chapter yet. GONG omg emotions. Thanks for sticking with me all this time folks, you/it means the world to me. xo Raymi The Minx <3 Goodnight.

Time to get real

This family is very important to me. Please watch this and consider donating and helping out. Thank you. It would mean the world. Bryce’s life.

And read this too please. Oakville mom refuses to put a price on her son’s life
People suffering need support from politicians
. Thank you!

too busy to be interesting

HI! LOL

Hi friends, real or imagined. On the way to work selfinator. I take them for my bf but who am I kidding, I am taking them for you and by extension, me. I am sorry I am full of crap all the time but I just can’t help it.

There’s a selfie influx lately cos I have to look good daily and my motto has always been if it looks good then shoot it. Baha.

That’s the money shot though. If I could just look like a hot corporate Geena Davis like always, life would be good.

Serious business now. How to be Emo in twenty seconds.

I should have taken a picture of the discarded pod casing pile massacre, I eat like a frigging idiot.

Sent one of these dumb ones to bf and he said my hair is getting really long now. Yassssssssssssssss.

I love waffle thermal shirts. I wear this one inside out or the proper way dependent upon how I am feeling. You can take the girl out of the grunge but you can’t take the grunge out of the girl.

I have one of these bottle stashed in every pace I could possibly need it lol.

I had cheese and mango for lunch part one. I’m beginning to forget things I bring and leave in the fridge then my stomach will growl and it’s like wait a minute…!

I better get my movies back tonight. When people lend out your shit w/o your permission it’s like, at what point did that seem like a good idea to you?????

I think people identify with Wes Anderson because he touches on everything ultra mega fantastically nostalgically kitschy and hipster, reuses the same actors whom to which we also identify and so he has “a thing” in fact he has many. And we want in on it. Like come on, Bill Murray? If your thing could be Bill Murray wouldn’t you call it a fucking day too?

This one was meant for my frame but I printed it too big so I put the special place Holland park bench photo in instead. Someone asked if I photoshopped it cos it’s so green. Nopesters!

Shrimp Diane is my jam. BRB #maybe.

PS A NEW V-SPOT CAME OUT TODAYMI CRAYMI BUNNY EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOOT IT! <<< Click that ish.

V-Spot 4 in particular was the feelings for me. It’s like Life of Pi in 5 minutes, bawling. Well played Google India. <3

Lucky fourteen

Cheers to me yo. Celebrate your shit doggunnit!

Cheers to me indeeeeed. A real stamp is being designed for my side blerg bar. Having access to designers now is great. btw don’t I look like a pimp? Heidi Fleiss was always a role model of mine just saying, before the going to jail thing I mean. She ran tings!

Me in Holland. That was a fun night. Okay I have homework to do bye xo.

FAQ

Okay hi.

I like how I preface all blog posts all breathless like I just flew in from San Diego (and boy are my arms tired!) like guys, hey I’m here now! I just ran down the hallway to BE HERE. I already forgot the ultra awesome joke I was going to make about myself. When your brain is your only friend your attention span is off the chain. Oh right, now I remember. I was just skimming down my blog and thinking how boring my life is or how I present it and I admit I am super boring except not really I get to do what I want more or less I now see that after being around people with kids like when asked what I did over the weekend and I’m like SFA it’s almost disappointing I have no exciting thing to share, although I know that I did do some exciting things like eat Chinese food alone on the couch drinking screwdrivers watching “I have no recollection” though it must have been good otherwise I wouldn’t have been watching it at all. Oh right I watched We’re the Millers. I give it a 7, imdb gives it 7.1 you be the judge.

The original title of this post was Frequently in-asked questions of me. I then realized that in 14 years I never made a blog post called FAQ. And that is sad. And I know that because it says “faq” in the url for this post, otherwise it would say faq-2. That means in fourteen years there haven’t been frequently asked questions about me. Which isn’t really true because I get asked questions all the time, same things posed differently and probably a lot of things I deem TMI for this blog. I’m way more private than I used to be. It’s like sitting on a mountain of secret stuff, which is what makes gossip so juicy when you finally hear something about the regular cast of characters in your life it’s like, grab the popcorn.

Not saying I am hiding anything particularly juicy, well maybe some things always but there’s no point cos homie don’t play that way no mo so! Writing here is supposed to help me perform better elsewhere but I don’t know anymore ahahha. Here is a picture of me with blonde hair on a zebra. GOODNIGHT.

We passed this landmark weirdo restaurant again this summer and I was like oh yeah there’s gonna be an elephant and other zoo animals, an arc… BF and sister were like how did you know that? as we zoomed right by it. Baha.

I’m into a Gaga phase again btw. This performance is great, once she breaks into Do what you want (with my body). I also like her because she reminds me of my childhood bestie who I got in all sorts of trouble with and was cuckoo bananas to the core, like Gaga and they kind of look similar in the face plus we sang 80’s songs in our backyards and performed in our sliding glass door reflections into the garden hose and other ridiculous shit. Peace! honk shoo honk shoo (snore sounds). I hope she doesn’t read this, I bet the other bestie (I had 4) will, and think it’s about her haha snap.

In ten days my blog is FOURTEEN. Intensity.

And don’t forget about that Lifetime achievement Award that I fit into conversation at least once daily. IRLY.

And don’t forget the humble LIFE nom brag. This is where you say I wouldn’t mind winning that one, and yeah that’d be great but for reals I want the LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD cos I (Danny Glover voice) TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT. gahah. No really, I am dedicated to blogging, to you guys, my little Raymis day in and out life changes and so many of those you have always been there, raymitheminx.com has always been there, for me it is my breath of fresh air. xo

Thanks be to awesome

Hi Monday, how was yours? Here’s all my favourite songs (and their awesome vids) of the mo’. My blog was just mysteriously down for a bit there and I blew a gasket, Monday is a harsh mistress ain’t she? I’m just going to stop promising you guys things for the next little while because I just can’t follow through all de time. Namaste. I super intend on loading you up with a decent blog post tomorrow though okay? I’m already overdue my V piece and like I got a full time gig now which takes first place obvs blogs sorry. Maybe I’ll get a second wind before passing out, but maybe not. I go to bed earlier now even though you think you can fool yourself running on like no sleep and still being a functional human being the next day, in high school sure yeah but as a 30 year old. Um no. Can’t. Also it’s just that some woman on my mom’s facebook got me all steamed and I gave my barely any energy left reserve up to that plus had some running around after work to do making that me-window that much smaller can you imagine if I had kids I’d be flat-lined right now. LD BF combo that and toasted yo.

that was cool back when i did it

I super wanted these flamingo peach pink ear muffs but I’d never wear them, but I wanted them just in case I need to wear them. Do you have irrational clothing thoughts/instances like that ever?

I went with this fun mix-up of Anna Sui perfumes, the purple one I tried in store and it’s lovely. As for the rest fingers crossed. I maxed out all my potions so it was time to replace plus I’ll probably give one to my niece.

Between scent sampling you sniff coffee beans to neutralize the ol olfactories there gov’na. Crazy neat.

Rocky is a food cat. If you are eating food, he is there. We checked out some Keeping up with the Kardashians – btw you should prob just shorten that to “The Kardashians” just saying as a profesh copywriter and all ;).

I want to get the office hooked on this and I know how to introduce it. Am eating it all day long today btw, and this time no shrimp. It’s just as amaze as Spadina Gardens. I’ve never encountered a place to get it right like Spadina G before ever.

I did not feel up to making decisions today, so I didn’t get the hat although grey beanies are my thing. It’s 3 for 10 or something like that, I’ll save those brain busters for tomorrow when I go out for more work attire. Today I jut wanted fun. The poncho is fun work casual or for if I go on a tequila bender. Aiiiiiieee papi!

Once I slipped into my hipster Mr. Rogers cardigan I got late night narcissitical. Sorry. You have to as a way to overcompensate for whatever thing I was insecure about at the time.

Formal Friday. Shut up. Hee. I have no idea how I am going to top it next week.

A work homie said I dressed like a geek the other day I was like WHAT!? Then they said they were shocked. AHAHHA this is not the offending outfit and I was like dude I have to dress like a geek then someone else backed me on the nerd front and was like yeah it’s cool to dress like a nerd, it’s good, it’s good to dress like one. See I get it. It’s like playing life dress up everyday, no wait, actually is playing life dress up. I like it. Expressing yourself creatively as a creative is manditory in the being awesome department as well as not stunting the creative flow, or process.

This will be over soon. I take pictures for my bf. Yes, lame ones.

But my hair is getting longer and you know that’s like in the top 3 of the most important things in my life neighbourhood so you know I am liking that.

I almost got a leopard print watch even bigger than this one but thought that was too insane, I’ll stick to the mellower loud and neon peach one instead, yeah much more subtle.

The price point is no different betwixt shoppers and the bay so hit the bay this time plus they didn’t have what I bought at The Bay at Shoppers. At shoppers my makeup was on sale. I bought 4 tubes. Ultra discount. Usually that means they’re phasing it out which worries me.

And here I am as a sweet dork. Peace no probs.