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blogupied

Hi. Me again. Yesterday late in the afternoon we went to our favourite park to feed the ducks and it was bananas. Or ducking futs. The night before we went and dumped all these crackers in the water and nothing I think ducks and fish abide by normal people sleep/eating schedules (LAME) but anyway today we will prob go back at the same time and do it again BECAUSE DUCKS. Maybe follow that up with a nap lets not get crazy now people. No lets.

Happy Pride BTW I love this photo I stole off Jezebel. Jezesmell. Love/hate those feminists, more so love. Anyway stroke thy inner gay all week long hey hey heyyy.

The carnies are coming. It’s HELL DAYS. Helle Poort. It’s neat that they have all these “things” in Holland that to me are strange or bizarre but no different than other things Canadians or Americans or Brits may celebrate. Like, Flag Day. What the hell is that other than the obvious?

That’s the Hell Day dog. If you see him on your property legend has it that SOMEONE WILL DIE. They are the messengers of bad news. Not necessarily that someone will die but PROBABLY. Or like, something Final Destination style and cos it’s farm country you’ll likely see the dog roaming a farmer’s field omg I just sharted.

Necklace park, favourite. Not actually called that but you know me by now I am an idiot. Just came back from there now and fed the ducks, it was adorable I don’t care how lame it sounds we are getting more and more Forrest Gump and kind of enabling each other to go full R-word today we thawed bread from the freezer, the good stuff, the rich brown bread and I like that because it’s not going in my mouth and henceforth my hips. Raymi 1; carbs 0.

Unfortunately they mowed down my daisy field though wtf. It’s nice and clean looking now but walking through it was uber whimsical and part of the to-ducks fun. Jerks. OH WELL.

Walky walk walk. Those are his vintage Nikes I made fun of once then he explained how they’re a retro look people wear here and I was like, still don’t get it. I hate that I come from a people of haters like elementary school back in bullying days everyone ripped everyone to pieces so if you wore pointyish shoes like these for gym class you were one of the poor kids. I remember that and it stuck. Frigging assholes. I wasn’t a “poor kid” but I saw how they got ripped on (don’t worry I was a leader and stepped in a lot) but now these NIKES are over a hundred Euros to purchase.

Look at my thumbnail I painted it pretty stupid. They’re getting longer again so the obsession continues.

SO science fiction retro robot.

I look pale and lip-less BUT my hair looks long, is getting long. You guys are fucked now I am going to be so hair flippingly arrogant. Platinum is fine if you abide by a healthy diet of no partying then it will have a better chance to rejuvenate and as we get older we grow less hair too so that’s also working against you. I can still feel hairs breaking every so often but with darker hair it grows healthier, thankfully.

Holding a whipping switch which is also part of the experience. First it’s a secret tickle on your neck or ear then you realize it’s not nature but Raymi then it’s a whip fight til the thing disintegrates. FUN.

Holy crap how fabulous am I. That’s one of my blog pose head tilt tricks. You’re welcome. Think I’ll insta this one. Later though it has taken all day to blog this garbage, hella ADD + I don’t finish posts in one sitting anymore. God bless Save Draft.

Sky porn.

Still holding my weapon cool cool.

I can’t wait to be tanned and jacket-less.

Okay dork.

Other than old people, these are my peers. We’re getting complacent with them and they’re definitely getting used to us, we’ve watched them grow and tomorrow maybe we’ll steal the smallest one. KIDDEENG. But furreal I now know what my favourite past time is and I might have to start a bread budget cos this shit ridonkulous. My videos of them feeding are “off the chain” I’ll upload one later/eventually.

I don’t like when the babies get pecked from the parents/older ones cos they’ve grown and learned feeding skills and are seen as a threat now I’m always like NO STOP HEYYYYYY when I’m throwing bread and it’s a total covert op to throw a piece over there so one duck you temporarily favour can get the one you whip in his direction. Is there duck blogs? I feel like I will probably start reading them and maybe join a duck blog ring/discussion group like yesterday and bf used to feed ducks with g-ma so is why he loves this shit so much too and cos I”m like an animal whisperer it makes me in like flynn forevs.

Yesterday I was a little scared of them. I do have a bit of a bird phobia. Today I was just tickled pink by them, piled on my feet the littlest ones. I’m 5 years away from my baby making chance window to close so I’m probs biologically overly mental about shit like ducks.

Art too but that has nothing to do with my biology, just my eccentricity.

Love this thing but wtf is it? We’ll enjoy TDot island cos there’s lotsa weird on that too yeah.

Walking to art zombie. It’s what hipsters at art openings look like anyway.

I lurve it.

So close.

I swear wasn’t walking as slow as it looks.

Why isn’t there a plaque for this one?

You can’t even spin it.

This is the instagrammable one I think it just has that jerk off quality. Doin’ it.

These WTFs are pretty amazing too.

They, also do nothing. They just is.

I got those shades for five bucks in Kensington last summer cos I knew I’d never find a sweet colour fade/blend like that again.

And the orig from the top one.

Keepin’ it LOTR lush. Reminds me of that park in Vancouver, Stanley? It’s so moist there everything has moss on it. Love moss. I’m probs part fairy.

This branch is super low we pass it all the time and finally I spun around on it, he told me to plank I was like NO WAY NEVER.

But I was also stuck cos it was too high, too low, too thick and I have no abdominal strength and my pants were too tight and, more excuses? Okay I just got my period too essentially handicapped oh right, I’m handicapped too at least I tried. I look really tall though right and I’m not even straightened.

If you need tree trunk models I’m game.

I assure you this was not planking I was momentum pushing myself upward from being stuck in a leaned-head stand position while he laughed at me.

Okay I’m bored of this now I’m going to tone my pipes. Happy Hump Dizzle.

7 thoughts on “blogupied

  1. “This is the instagrammable one I think it just has that jerk off quality”–ah hahahaa. Your hair looks super shiny.

  2. Awww, ducks! I worked at a park & had a sort of pet big white duck, Quackers I called him, super tame, let me pet him/her, one day was dead, got by a dog or shot, dunno, it devastated me to this day, that was omg 30 yers ago holy crap I’m old, oh well :) Love your parks & the sculpture things :) :D

  3. Anne I thought you were my age this whole time fwahah sorry about your duck. I’ve had many temporary bird pets too, even a seagull LOL seriously a seagull spent the day with me once.

  4. i know i know, sometimes it’s crackers, i’ve fed ducks bread since childhood and to the best of my knowledge didn’t kill any. I’d prefer not to feed them bread at all but it’s so convenient, it seems everyone does the same too. I will buy grapes.

  5. At work, there used to be this duck. We fed him and he was very tame. One Monday we came into work and there was a pile of feathers and a duck head on the ground. Someone killed our pet duck, probably because he wasn’t afraid of people. I will never forget that duck, but I don’t feed them any more.
    They like grapes and salty crackers.

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