i’m a lousy lazy lay
actually i’m not a lousy lay, i’m pretty good in the sack i just prefer to not put much effort into it sometimes. like i put so much effort into making the vessel dynamite. sick. slammin’. so maybe yeah, you pick up the slack now for me will ya?
so the red flag and i have been pissing the day away. the red flag is my current kill btw. i’ve been trying to exercise some restraint in the discussing what i’m bagging department, well, in the not discussing it department. discussing it on my blog that the universe reads department. now why is he a red flag? many reasons. well, for starters he’s an emotional island which seems to be my fuckin’ cup of tea. he’s also rife with baggage. it was going to end last week actually, i foresaw it ending in one giant mess but things changed, we had “the talk” so we both know where we stand for the most part.
knowing something can’t go anywhere is a bit of a relief but it’s also like maybe it can? you still know it can’t though. i see him as a challenge, i like challenges. i think i can conquer people. i ensnare them in my dramatic world and they enjoy their stay in raymiland if but for a short while.
so it’s exclusive banging for now but it’s not like i’m not looking for something better. he said that he won’t be able to give me what i need and thats fine i don’t need a boyfriend right now. he says for now i’m on the rollercoaster at raymiland and i like it. i’m gonna ride again.
i’ve made contact with an old consort from a good ten years ago at least. retardedly good looking, hasn’t aged at all. now this guy is a major deviant so who knows where it’ll go, how it’ll go. i do not intend to fuck him, so there’s that decision made for now. it’s still a jealousy trap which we all know i’m a huge believer in/fan of.
when i contacted red flag i told him my intentions were entirely indecent. i was thinking about how i was coming back to the city and maybe i should have some extracurricular activities lined up for myself. he took the bait and off we went. i remember feeling sad after/during the first encounter cos i figured that woulda been it. i’ll have to come back to this later kinda gotta split and i’m covering for someone tonite. later wieners!
February 18th, 2010 at 4:43 pm
with my past unpredictable on/off/casual relationships i was always worried that every time would be the last time i would hear or see from them for a while. always worried about never getting closure. i’m such a wimp.
February 18th, 2010 at 5:08 pm
here’s my 2cents worth
When a guy tells you he can’t give you what you need…
hear it the firs time
and then believe it
Don’t fool yourself into thinking “its a challenge”
think of it a time filler till you find the “right one”
As for reconnecting with a former deviant
is it just your curiosity? Because hooking up with past flings just brings back the old empty feelings you had with them before,people don’t change much
and its not true intimacy
Just take your time and enjoy yourself
and know that this isn’t a race
February 18th, 2010 at 5:13 pm
Oh mom give it a rest please. There aren’t and never were emotional attachments with the past deviant. And as for red flag we’re just having fun, no pressure or complications.
February 18th, 2010 at 5:27 pm
just giving you some wisdom advice
you have a good head on your shoulders, you will figure it all out on your own in time
situations with too much baggage and a perceived “challenge”
in reality translates to “too much work”
add to it an emotional connection and you can get dragged into it for too long
So you are right
take your time, just have fun
and keep options open
And nothing wrong with just loving yourself for awhile
its a wonderful growing experience
February 18th, 2010 at 6:46 pm
I’m with raymismom on this one!
February 18th, 2010 at 9:17 pm
oh my fuck.
my ex has those shoes. is that red flag in that pic?
(i cant believe i just stared at his hands to see if it was his hands)
February 18th, 2010 at 9:22 pm
Also in all seriousness, even I’M with your mom on that one. A good rebound is a one night stand, not someone that will mind fuck you and make you wish you were back in your last relationship.
The “casual relationship” rebound ends up usually hurting you more than the relationship you were recovering from in the first place.
February 18th, 2010 at 9:27 pm
Its not him breanna hhaha. No hurting goin on here no worries.
February 18th, 2010 at 10:59 pm
Aint nuthin wrong with Mr Right Now instead of Mr Right.
February 18th, 2010 at 11:05 pm
i’ve been in one of these with a guy from many moons ago for about a year now – getting out is tricky. have fun!
February 19th, 2010 at 1:34 am
i had to re-read this one to get it but i don’t think i quite fully understand but you know what it’s oKAY!! No need to break it down for us, raymiland rules.
February 19th, 2010 at 1:35 am
that Krista is actually me, Krista oceanaria
February 19th, 2010 at 5:28 am
it looks like phil in the pic…definately something he would wear
February 19th, 2010 at 10:24 am
it’s not fil and i think more than one dude owns the same pair of shoes. why is your name babylove that’s so gay, please don’t tell me what my ex fiance wears and call yourself babylove in the same sentence. gross guy.