cheeseburger in a can keep scrolling.
this is how much of a loser i am. i sat across from GABRIEL BYRNE at fresh by myself today and stared at him 677078 times and wussed out of taking his picture he looked at me a lot too with intrigue perhaps or maybe with stop looking at me eye contact pleading? anyway i took my time collecting all the take out items i ordered so my body was facing him and one of his buddies turns around to look at me (they were checking out everyone there) and i sort of half smile but am too shy to look at gabriel again so i duck out get to the corner of bloor and spadina (on my way for a tan) and notice that MY FLY IS DOWN.
SAME CORNER I NOTICED IT WAS DOWN LAST WEEK WHEN FIL DROPPED ME OFF.
FUCK YOU THE CORNER OF BLOOR AND SPADINA.
if you need me i will be in my loser cave.
to my left was where he was sitting against the wall.
at least i got an old tenner out of it.
and yes the irony is not lost on me that i was at fresh alone in the annex and had to ask a waitress who that guy was that i kept staring at and can you take his picture for me ? no you have to treat them like normal people? ok then. and my voice was sick husky raspy and then when i went for my tan all my food diffused throughout the room and travelled in through the fan at the foot of the bed and blasted me in the hot sweaty face for 8 SUPERbed minutes and i was already hot and flushed feeling from being sick to begin with it almost matched the last time i went where i thought i was going to crap the tanning bed the entire time.
oh and the environmentally sound take-out container containing my dosas decided to totally disintigrate so i had to carry the see-thru plastic bag of food home what looked like a huge bag full of barf.
i am never going outside ever again.
how would YOU feel if your fly was down in front of this guy?
FUCK MY LIFE!
when i got to the tanning salon i looked in the mirror and realised i didn’t look as dweeby as i felt and i bet he would have been charmed by me in some shape or form.
alack, yet another thing i have pussied out of.
is it tuesday?
oh its thursday
Phil: are you in a time machine