so i’m not at the hospital, i’m going to a clinic tomorrow. waiting 5 hours wasn’t really appealing. we waited 2 just to see a triage nurse i took a wizz then she said 4 more hours to go to see a doctor unnngh bye.

we are in duane’s hotel room right now, christie shot-gunned a can of wine, duane’s loaded, christie‘s loaded and now we head out to some dj bar and it’s pissing rain. oh man duane‘s funny drunk. tony’s stuck in chicago we think. hahahaha.

i’m avoiding showering and getting ready cos i don’t want to go to hospital so here’s some memory lane for you, i’m thoroughly depressed now and therefore ready for hospital.

the first time i went blonde to surprise fil when he came back from a work trip, i fucked it up and had to spend 200 to have it corrected and this was the outcome, it felt too adult for me at the time so eventually added more blonde and disastered it, big mistake.

i had black hair for so long it just didn’t feel right this is moments before fil came through the door to meet us at band practise.

the following summer i chopped it all off once i dyed it dark again and fried my hair to all hell, most depressing time of my life, bob-headed and fat.

sigh.

this picture makes me very happy, i remember feeling really happy that morning, the cottage and sunshine morning and likely drunk still from the nite before.

HONEY SAY BYE TO THE KIDS GRAB YOUR COAT THE BABYSITTER’S HERE!

well duh.

everytime fil looks at that photo of himself he goes what a little retard, i cannot agree more. awwwwwwwwww.

one of the rare times i wore a bra oh hey paige.

the condo looks so bare, heaviest wedges ever.

hair’s getting longer, still bored with it, bangs o’clock. ahhaha i just noticed cid in the background.

i love this guy.

yikes! easy there fatface.

so unhappy.

poor me.

oh look art vandelay showed up.

there are fifty photos of this “series” on my laptop i wonder how wasted i was, pfft “wonder”.

k bye wish me luck.

oh how nice another email from a fan of my queef article. i get these pretty often, though this one is the most, well, you’ll see:

I don’t know how old this article is but I just had to say… that a good set of pussy farts is something to strive for. It tells me the girl is getting fucked right. When my cock is swollen nice and big and her pussy is wet and tight, lips all swollen and juicy… there’s no room inside for anything extra like air, so just hammer the fuck outta that sweet cunt and make it sing. I really like the slurping sound when you pull out and the follow up fart when you slam it back. Get her to moaning and squealing at the same time and it’s music to my ears. When she’s laying there quivering and tears a rolling, not knowing whether to cry or laugh or both and smiling from ear to ear… then you’ve done it right. Kiss those sweet lips and thank your lucky stars you got a woman who loves sex as much as you do. Cum on guys, get w/ the program.

later…jay

(i was only able to read half of it).

i fought with a french dude on christmas eve, it’s a pretty good story, i’ll share it later. i’ve kind of been out of my mind since dec. 1 another not so good story i’ll share later. basically, i’m not pregnant, i did a test two nites ago cos i was nauseous for the twentieth time this month and shot up out of bed and said that’s fucking IT i want to know NOW (bought a test a week ago but it was too early to use it) so no i’m not knocked-up, there is something else wrong with me (yay!) and i have narrowed it down to my right kidney, based on how today goes, not banking on it to be too amazing, i’m going to be partying in a hospital waiting room tomorrow. we walked to winners yesterday and i was panting and out of breath and sore, maybe i have a bruised rib on top of that? dunno, but it is nearly impossible to bend over to lotion my legs or tie up shoes i have to time it to when i am exhaling and lean over slowly. i took a tylenol 2 last nite and laid on the couch. mom don’t tell dad about this and alarm him for fuck sake thank you. my kidney area has been sore for two weeks now. so all these things combined, thinking i’m pregnant essentially all month long (thanks for putting that in my head fil) xmas, and everything i have been a fucking basketcase, and of course when you get a notion like pregnancy everywhere you look and hear is something about babies holy fucking overload. when we were in indigo i was this close to having a full-on panic attack/fainting spell and was searching frantically for one of their stupid chairs to sit in but they had all been removed, nice.

christmas morn’ fil’s new ride video.

turkey time video.

cid’s millionth time-out video.

loner GO train ride back to toronto video.

christmas eve 2am.

just waitin’ for fil to get out of the can.

catskills cops video.

the editors backstage at v-fest video.

spying on the city from mg‘s hotel room video.

casby’s aftermath video.

matthew good load me up backstage at massey hall video.

me: i just ran in on fil in the bathroom cos i thought he was masturbating with my vibrator in the shower, he wasn’t – it was his new battery powered toothbrush
he does calf stands in the shower when he brushes his teeth so he was bobbing up and down and im like omg he IS! then i see the toothbrush
ha

Jamie: hahhaa

me: i guess the toothbrush would be a good ruse for covering up the vibe sound
but then it would be supersonic loud

Jamie: maybe he was!
see if your vibe smells like butt

me: ewwwwwwwwwwwwww
wouldnt you just use it on your balls
or peener

Jamie: wouldn’t that hurt?

me: i wouldnt know

Jamie: my balls are way too sensitive to be vibrated

me: too much information

this little showcase was empty so i put all the leftover ornaments in it, i thought it looked good, the next day when we came back over my dad had removed them, i knew it. anal!

i re-gifted this, ever since i shoved a jr. mint up my nose and it got stuck and exploded hot mint down my nasal passage i haven’t been a fan of the mint/chocolate flavour.

fil got the tiniest remote control car ever, video of it to come.

yay it’s finally fucking over!

i have to return this bad boy, the clasp pops open (i have a broad back, it’s a small).

fil got me this it’s not here yet that’s why i got to see a picture of it.