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Raymamina,

Ciao,
H

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by erica.

we went away finally i was going to lose my fucking mind if we didn’t my nose is extremely red i can’t tell if it makes it look bigger or smaller alright tv time i have some funny stories to share but i am too exhausted/drunk/hung to figure out a good way to condense them wait i’ll try and i will caps lock for added effect.

WE WERE TRASHED FUNNY TRASHED AND HIDING IN THE WOODS SPYING ON THE PARTY WE JUST LEFT THAT WAS WINDING DOWN WAITING FOR THE OLD FOLKS TO GO TO SLEEP SO THESE COUGARS COULD SNEAK AWAY WITH US TO THE SCARY HOUSE WE WERE STANDING STILL IN THE DARK AND THEN GAVE UP AND I USED MIKE AS A GUIDE TO LEAD ME TO THE HARBOUR AND HE WALKED THROUGH EVERY SINGLE FUCKING BRANCH LEAF EVERYTHING SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE THEN WE LAID DOWN IN THE DIRT FOR AWHILE SO TARLEY COULD GO DO SOME SPYING AND WHEN WE LEFT THE HARBOR TODAY TO GO BACK TO THE MAINLAND ALL OF MIKE’S BOTTLES FROM WHERE WE WERE LYING DOWN WERE STILL THERE.

tv.

dinner numero two

forget me nachos, eat them and you totally forgot you did unless you have a picture to look at the following morning.

hell’s!

that was longer, i cut it yesterday to be more whimsical. i bought it originally to wear on my birthday but it was too cold and i was going to wear tights too and i didn’t feel like having a pear-shaped disgusting look all night long. i have that in black too i might cut it, we’ll see, you kinda have to pose like mariah carey if you wear it a la buff and when i say mariah carey i mean big ugly tits and stripper shoes.

don’t know the story behind this party, no one really cared, just you know, a fire guys, whatayagoinado?

fil does a me.

what did i order?

aimoo! she whisper talks i never noticed that before. aimoo said in school in alliston kids said she was brown and ate weird food. don’t you just love white trash?

fil had two burgers yesterday must be nice.

i can’t bring myself to eat the tentacles, battered i can, grilled, ungh i can’t believe i am even looking at these now sorry seafood lovers you are fucking weird.

oh what’s that ANOTHER picture of me? GET OUT!

i was just thinking about the last time i was at h&m at oakville place and i was looking at the cheap 7.90 shirts and i had two shirts slightly different shades of grey and i asked this girl who had piles of i dunno more glamorous shit in her hands and i asked her what shade of shirt i should choose and she chose the one i didn’t want and i asked why did she choose that one and she goes i dunno and i hold up the pants i was going to buy beside it and asked if it was too matchy and she said yeah i guess so. i bet she thought i was a dickhead, why would i ask her advice if i already had my mind made up? also you are not suppose to talk to strangers when you are shopping cos then it emphasises the fact that you are buying shit you don’t want or need or even like which is counter-active to the zombie spending money therapy.

have you ever been to oakville place? it is mental, like rodeo drive in a mall, little slutty girls everywhere with their dad’s credit cards and everyone is checking everyone else out, and the cougar mothers barrrrrrrrrrf. it feels like planet biodome california, like the hills, i swear, everything is like that these days. tube tops, hair extensions, wedge flip flops leave me alone you are not on your way back from laguna fucking beach!

progress, this is called my pain canvas, fil and i got in a fight one nite and i wrote all those emo sayings on it.

paint is still wet, have yet to re-do the sharpie outlines.

it’s really hard to focus when ugly little kids are slamming the universe in the park when the windows are open.

this will be finished a quarter to never, you can call dibs on it if you want.

me: I’M TRYING TO DO SOME PAINTING BUT THIS LITTLE KID IS SLAMMING A ROCK OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN AGAINST A POLE IN THE PARK AND I AM THIS CLOSE TO ASKING THE ADDRESS OF WHOEVER IS WATCHING THE KID SO I CAN GO TO THEIR HOUSE AND SLAM A ROCK AGAINST THEIR FENCE A THOUSAND TIMES LATER ON WHEN THEY ARE HAVING DINNER.

Phil: uh oh

me: RAGE
titall killed my painting mood

Phil: titall, eh?

me: totally
i meant
ha

Phil: tits
i mean
totes

me: i changed my mind i cant have spadina gardens
i have to eat the ********** at ******* tonite

Phil: ok i am fat anyway

me: AW
dinky!
baby
you are adorable
THAT KID IS STILL SLAMMING HIS FUCKING ROCK
LOUD FAST LOUD SLAM SLAM SLAM
GO AWAY
NOW SOME OTHER KID IS DOING IT TOO
WITH GLASS

Phil: it is a make raymi crazy conspiracy

me: IT SOUNDS LIKE CHAINS ON MY BRAIN
I HATE CHILDREN DIE
the women watching must be super hung or on tons of tranquilizers
theyre just sitting there all calm

Phil: pills man

me: everytime my finger touched a paintbrush SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM SLAM
how ironic what i was working on is called my pain canvas

Phil: haha

me: what time do u want to go to the ******* i invited aimoo
she said she is back d/t from work around 6.30

Phil: oh ok i dunno i wont be outta here till 6 anyway

me: ok 7ish

Phil: okish

me: vice guy emailed me
im going to work hard on it all day tomorrow and write it all
i am too annoyed to think right now fucking asshole kids

I’M TRYING TO DO SOME PAINTING BUT THIS LITTLE KID IS SLAMMING A ROCK OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AGAIN AGAINST A POLE IN THE PARK AND I AM THIS CLOSE TO ASKING THE ADDRESS OF WHOEVER IS WATCHING THE KID SO I CAN GO TO THEIR HOUSE AND SLAM A ROCK AGAINST THEIR FENCE A THOUSAND TIMES LATER ON WHEN THEY ARE HAVING DINNER.

last nite’s dinner not an adequate wine base oh well the scale will thank you in the morning.

light cream cheese instead of goat cheese, pre-chicken.

fil brought home stinky cheese AGAIN. i say bring home whatever cheese you want, something i will like though. ungh. i made him these even though he spilled wine ALL OVER my new fucking pants and sprayed me in the ass before that with a spray bottle. my pants are drying in the tub.

i was most proud of this guy, he was the end of the loaf and had all these bread pockets to shove chicken and cheese and basil into i am a fag.

don’t ask me what that cheese is i will barf on you.

i have not mailed this yet. i was high when i made it. i am going to wait ’til 2014 to send it.

yep definitely baked, gentle thoughts?

me: O========3

Phil: is that supposed to be something crude

me: i was trying to figure out what you use for balls
Q====3
sigh

Phil: 8====3
doi

me: oh
sorry balls wizard

check out this dude

he had a thousand things brought with him to play some nerd game world of warcraft? i walked behind him and saw he was at a store called wands r us. i think that’s his own modem. i’m guessing the majority of my readers look like this.

this person is sexist.

one of the things liane sent from shanghai.

me: did you like getting blown last nite

Phil: duh

me: should we make a blown chart

Phil: ?

me: omg
a calendar of blownness

Phil: sure yes

me: sometimes it’s like you dont know me at all
i just had to stir my coffee with a knife
the last two days it was a fork

Phil: oh mercy how are you surviving

me: tomorrow it will be a q-tip
lets use every single plate and glass before we do the dishwasher

Phil: ok

me: it wont all fit though

Phil: no it wont

me: so much for that idea

Phil: yes, so much